What do you think of the people who have been to hell and back but it was their own fault?

[Anonymous]

Say someone made a really bad mistake/decision when they were younger but they manage to somewhat redeem themselves.

At what point is someone unworthy of forgiveness?

Does it make you sympathetic at all to know the villain hates herself for what she's done?

Do you think you could forgive someone who altered your life for the worse? What would it take?

[lightbulb27]

I think they are on their way to a better place. once you've been to hell you don't want to go back. If you aren't sure you were in hell, you probably were. Not everything is your fault, a lot is projected onto us as children that we don't want, and was never ours. That combined with how we perceive (personality influence) can distort our lives and cause us to behave and make decisions we otherwise would not. So we have to learn, take responsiblity to be whom we want to be, not whom we were distorted to be.

Yes I could and have, not saying I always can... that's a tall order. It requires understanding and accepting. Without that, it's turning over to God and accepting what is good. You will have to understand yourself, your childhood training, and why you made decisions you made.

If you made a choice and it went bad, you have to accept who you were at that time and who they were. If you take out of it something greater, then... it was "worth it" in the end or had value. Thus the suffering wasn't a waste.

These can be tricky to process. Find God helps, it can equally confuse and confound with "why" questions... why was this allowed, etc..

If you are asking this then you have a soul and sensitivity, it's just a matter of getting the right vantage point so you can rise above whatever happened.

[ANDYB88]

I respect people who made mistakes and demonstrate that they’ve learned from them and changed. I think people who have actively bettered themselves and their lives show great self awareness and tenacity. They’re often more interesting to be around, and offer a more widescreen perspective on life compared to people who’ve never had to claw their way back from some kind of Hell. These are the inspirational people and they deserve to be celebrated.

[Anonymous]

I had a friend get into some serious legal trouble which was ironic because he worked for the law. He was arrested for committing the same crimes he arrested others for. Just about everyone walked out of his life. He grew up in a great family, financially set, went to college, had a decent career, in a relationship (though this was the person who aided in his crimes), there just was no reason for him to do what he did. His initial reaction as a super negative one, like people "should" allow him to move on, but he hurt so many people in the process of his crimes, that it was a slap in the face for him to demand that everyone else should "get over it." I tried to find whatever sympathy I could for him, but even as I extended the olive branch, he tore it away, so I moved on too. That is the thing about doing something "that bad," you burn a lot of brides and some that can never be rebuild. Sure you hope people will forgive you and come back into your life, but that may never happen or it may take years to repair the damage.

[Asker]

What would it take for him to be forgiven? A heartfelt apology or something bigger?

[Opinion Owner]

Nothing left between us left to say. We haven't spoken in 4 years. I think people are of the assumption that everyone needs or deserves a redemption story or that someone needs to be the bigger person and forgive/forget, but there are some people that just aren't meant to be in your life nor should you feel the need to have them there. It's a lesson a lot of people learn the older they get.

[AddylynnNightingale]

Been there. It's not always your own fault. Sometimes it's something that's completely out of your control. Wrong place wrong time, you or someone you love.

[blissinanarchy1]

I felt like karma hit me, I did 18 months for a crime I didn’t commit, but was found innocent. I did some fucked up shit before. My friend was shot in the face. In the inner city, of course noone told or testified, nothing was caught on camera. I was then under investigation for a shooting, but the victim never told or testified. The victim was the person who shot my friend in the face. It’s the way Philly goes. I moved out a while ago

[genericname85]

well depends. most likely i'll forgive but certainly not forget. for the people who ruined parts of my life, they are most likely very different people now. they aren't the person who fucked up my childhood anymore. but as soon as i see a hint of them still being that way, i'll take back the redemption.

[purplepoppy]

I think it shows they can learn from past mistakes and grow from it. I can respect someone who can say I was an idiot but I've changed and rebuilt my life. It's people who do dumb shit then just keep repeating it that I can't stand.

[Allyfax]

It would take sticking with you and fixing what they can , in life its impossible to find some1 that sticks with you though think and thin , remember life is long everybody makes mistakes if they are your world... And they make you their world , remember you don't love some1 for what they did or do , but for who they are.. keep on keeping on girl

[FilmGuy93]

That's how life experience works. Just learn from the mistake and move on. The only thing I can't forgive is people who continue to proactively fuck their lives up out of some weird sense of pride.

[Anonymous]

Anyone can make a mistake. And even a big one. But it's when they refuse to learn from them. Stupid people don't all of a sudden become smart. Stupid people continue to make the same stupid mistakes.

[Asker]

At what point would you forgive or not forgive someone?

[Opinion Owner]

When I don't think she the person that learns from her mistakes.

[Adam1978]

No the world is full of people who hasn't wronged me, she has earned her situation. She needs to live with the consequences.

[Pleaznhim4me]

You mean Satan? He is one scary dude. Try to avoid him if possible. He’s a shifty guy.

[slatyb]

That depends on the circumstances. More likely I would just keep my distance.

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

I would give them sympathy and forgive them and support them.

[Dinosaursandanime65]

The point you become unworthy is when you are only a human physically

[Anonymous]

People like that are suckers for punishment and they probably have low self esteem.

[jimmy2]

Damn unworthy of forgiveness they are lock up

[maximumpower]

No sympathy.