If you were wronged but they're unremorseful, would you insist on an apology or not?

[Anonymous]

Let's say you were wronged (either got bullied, disrespected, etc) and wanted an apology.

However, when you confront the person they aren't one bit remorseful at all. Would you still demand an apology and accept a fake, insincere apology (even if they won't mean anything in those words) or be ok with getting no apology if it's not sincere?

Accept a fake apology, they're stil apologizing

I don't want any apology if it's not sincere

Other

[Screenwriter]

It's a waste of time to demand an apology from a person who doesn't feel, or doesn't know they've wronged you.

You can certainly make it clear to someone who's spoken to you harshly or disrespectfully that you're offended by their words, but that's the best you can do if someone is NOT sorry. I wouldn't expect anything.

If this is a workplace situation, I'd consult HR if it's a regular problem. If this is interpersonal with a SO, you might have a serious problem in the relationship if this is a common occurrence.

[Asker]

Exactly. What type of apology is it if you had to demand and they never would've apologized on their own free will?

[Screenwriter]

Well, some people are ignorant of how their words affect others. Or simply oblivious. Stating how you were affected is a good thing. Expecting or demanding an apology when someone IS oblivious or simply doesn't care. That's a losing cause.

[LaureenVO]

I always forgive people once they give me an apology (If I'm 100% sure they were in the wrong). However the apology needs to be real and come from their side (Out of themself, so not me telling them to apologize).

[Amy10223]

that would depend on the person who wronged me. If it was a family member or my childrne, of course I would want an explantion or apology, and if they didn't give it, then I would not be happy. That's happened with one family member of mine whose husband wronged the entire family. She in turn did not speak to us for 4 years. I thought an apology was warranted, but no one asked her about it. If it was a stranger and they did something without remorse, I would not care as much, although I would also write the person off and never interact with them again.

[Asker]

Yeah it can suck when someone you care or love don't apologize and even worse if you have to remind them. Once they give the apology, it's likely not valid anymore since it didn't came from them and they only said it when pressured or reminded.

[Amy10223]

Yes, I agree. This family member never apologized and expected people to come to her. She complained to an aunt that no one ever called her. Well, I was not going to--but another sister did. So when this happens--the person does not grow or learn that they were wrong--because what her husband did was very wrong. I guess her punishment was the knowledge that no one called her for 4 years.

[MCheetah]

I don't expect assholes to apologize, nor do I expect them. I just permanently cut those people out of my life. ... One way or another. And to add to that, I typically get my revenge on people like that, one way or another.

And I'm not going to reveal the prints-free way I manage to do that remotely. I haven't had to do that in a while, cause I gave that up in exchange for trying to be more positive. But I don't mind dusting the box off and bringing it back again if I'm particularly vengeful.

But yeah, I don't expect apologies. I expect vengeance. To the point you'll wish you were dead. You'll be left with nothing. Shout out to @aerissa_jade if she knows what I'm talking about. We've both shared some harsh experiences in life. And if she doesn't know, I'll tell her in PMs.

[Aerissa_Jade]

Oh yeah, I know what your talking about.

[MCheetah]

*nor do I expect them to be remorseful
(correction)

[FilmGuy93]

Nah. But if someone is refusing to appologize for the truly horrible way they treated me, there are probably some deeper psychological issues at play.

I had a "friend" in highschool (one of several people like this, actually) who legitimately ruined my life and altered who I am as a person. When I explained what his treatment did to me a good 10 years after graduating, his response was to laugh and say "I will never apologize."

[Asker]

Wow what a truly horrible person!!!
I hope you left and blocked him, went NC on him for good.

[FilmGuy93]

I definitely terminated the relationship, but that dude has some serious shit of his own to work through. I feel bad for him, more than anything. Dude needs to make peace within himself

[Asker]

He's a toxic person. I'm glad he's no longer in your life.

[RavVid]

I don't see how you can force someone to apologize if they don't feel any remorse and won't. So I am sort of B.

But B also means you are accepting them not apologizing for having done something badly wrong and possibly still associating with them.

I think you need to cut them out of your life.

[Asker]

Yeah I wouldn't keep them in their life at all. If you had to demand an apology and get it, it's going to be a fake, insincere apology by then.
Have you seen the movie You Again? The girl used to get bullied by her brother's fiancee when both girls were in HS. The former bully is unremorseful and the girl keeps pushing for an apology saying ''Hey I wanted a real apology and I DESERVED one''. That ''I deserved one'' sounds already like entitlement to me and it's sad that she ended up getting a forced, insincere apology at the end. Bad movie.

[RavVid]

I think I have. I am not sure DESERVED one is entitled. Depends on circumstances and I might agree.

A forced insincere apology could satisfy me if there was some humiliation if front of others. :)

[HateyouxD]

Lol I wouldn't demand an apology. I move on with my life. Fuck them!

[inhua]

what's done is done. an apology won't matter anymore.

[Account]

I would merely want them to stay the fuck away from me. I don't wanna hear any crap.

[Sparkie460]

If they wronged me and wouldn't apologize I would stop talking to them. It has happened to me several times. After I stopped talking to them for a while they eventually apologize and mean it.

[humanearth]

i Say Fuck the bastard

Life is to fucking short to deal with drama

[AngryCarl]

I don't apologize and I don't expect anyone to apologize to me. I just accept that they're an asshole and move on.

[jayhams]

I wouldn't associate with that person anymore

[Agape93]

No, I'll get even.