Have you ever experienced a home invasion?

[Gummy_Cluster]

This has happened to me a lot. But it's crazy, because they only steal my socks. But they don't steal them in pairs, they only take one of a certain color. So when I go looking for my red socks, I can only find one. I mean, if they're going to steal my socks, then just take the pair! If they only steal one, then I'm going to spend the next 8 hours looking for the missing sock. And they normally steal them out of the dryer. You put a pair of socks in the dryer, and only one comes out. And I know what you're thinking, and yes, I've filed a police report. I wasn't going to file a police report, but then others in the community told me the same thing has been happening to them. I get it, someone needs money to buy some crank, but how much can you get off of eBay for a single used sock? What does it mean?

[SnowedIn]

Whoa! I'm wondering if you live near me. I have this happen a LOT. Although, the MO is different. Hmmmm. Ours get stolen from the washing machine and from my daughter's room. She claims it's the cat or the mouse (we actually have one of each) but now I'm wondering if it's one of your home invaders. Frankly, I was hoping they'd take Mrs. Snow's crocheting materials or Snowflake #3's XBox but no luck there. Do you think if I put a sign on it, they would help or just leave it on red?

Oh, and people get money for used panties on eBay. I'm certain socks would command a pretty price.

[Gummy_Cluster]

LOL It's funny when people reply to a question without reading the description. One guy is replying to an actual home invasion. lol I stole this question from comedian George Carlin. He said that somewhere in the world, there's a huge pile of single socks, sunglasses and hair combs. I think it's true. Why did the thief only take one of my blue socks when he could have taken both of them?

[SnowedIn]

Wait. Hold up. You want people to read?

[Gummy_Cluster]

On my last question I told them not to reply unless they read the whole thing. You really can't explain yourself in the limited title. I never reply to a question before I read the title, description and every single post. A 16 year old girl on this site talked about her sexual relationship with a 40 year old guy. Everyone told her that it was statutory rape, and he could go to prison. But had these dorks bothered to read through the comments, they would have seen that she was from South Africa, and it's perfectly legal, just as long as the minor has a note from her parents saying it's OK. I know it's a crazy law, but you and I don't make the laws. I think Mrs. Snow makes the laws. Ask her when you get a chance. I Googled it, and she was right. I have no clue how you go about asking your parents for a note like that. How does that conversation even go? "Wow, it's raining cats and dogs. I wish I had a 40 year old guy to keep me warm at night." :)

[SnowedIn]

I think that conversation is easier that the resultant one when the sister asks "why does Susan get to sleep with 40 year old guys and I can't" in a petulant, plaintive voice. But I suppose I digress.

Yes, Mrs. Snow makes the laws. In fact, when I was in the Navy, one of my bosses was a three-star Admiral. That's a pretty high rank. And one time he asked for something. I told him know. He was amused, actually, and responded that he was a Vice Admiral and therefore why not. I told him that Mrs. Snow is a five-star Admiral. He thought for a moment and said, "good answer."

[Gummy_Cluster]

That's just funny as fuck. As you very well know, guys on this site say that women only want a guy with a 16 inch dick, and their looks need to be 10/10.
Smart people like us, and Mrs. Snow know that's bullshit, but these guys are lost causes. They are beyond help. I've written dating profiles for men and women. I try and interject humor into the profile. If you can get the other person to smile or even laugh, it's a game changer. They will become addicted to you and want more. I now refuse to write profiles for guys, because they really don't want a woman. They just love complaining that they don't have a woman. I wrote a profile for a lady friend, and she hesitated to post it. I told her she had to do it, or I would kick her ass. She posted it, and was engaged in three months. In my profile, I made her out to be every man's dream.

"I don't mind going hunting with you and your friends, but I don't want to take part in the murder of innocent deer. You and your sadistic pals can go out on your killing spree, but just let me sleep in the tent until noon. When you and the other killers get back to camp, I'll have bacon, eggs and hash-browns cooking. Depending on my mood, I might even have hot coffee waiting. But I can't guarantee that. I love fishing, but I ain't touching the worms or the slimy fish. If you can manage to do that for me, I will go fishing with you every day."

She said that guys were coming out of the woodwork to meet her. She was beyond chubby, but she became what guys were looking for. The only guys that want Barbie, are the virgin guys on this site.

[SnowedIn]

We need to open a business.

You are talented AND funny. That's hard to find.

But, I'm concerned: they want 16? What the heck am I supposed to do with 17.37 inches if Mrs. Snow leaves? What does this mean?

[ShadezMcgee]

Thankfully no, but I have had relatives that were jumped in the afternoon at home at gunpoint and physically restrained. Thankfully they weren't killed. They never found the fucking punks that did it, but those are the people who deserve to be fucking shot in the face.

All human life is sacred my ass. Fuck those clowns, they should be dead. Still baffles me that people think those individuals are deserving of rights when they pull shit like that.

[Dav1dTh0ma389]

Probably in the paranormal sense, and I just didn't realize it

[Gummy_Cluster]

That's probably it,

[CubaPirate]

Only from my grown up kids while I've been on vacation

[Gummy_Cluster]

Those dirty rotten scoundrels.

[CubaPirate]

I know they drank all my beer too 🤣☹🤣

[Gummy_Cluster]

What the fuck?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NvO-cpd8AuI

Skip to 4:16 Why is the rum gone? lol

[CubaPirate]

Nice 👍👍👍

[OfMiceandMen]

hahaha, cute analogy regarding the socks, and no I have been very fortunate not to experience a home invasion.

[Gummy_Cluster]

Lucky you. I've had single socks stolen for years. And much like yourself and everyone else, I have 300 ball point pens. But when you need one, they go into hiding. How is this possible? W

[Gummy_Cluster]

where do they hide?

[20yearsolder]

I have not, for their sake. That's a very good thing. They would have more holes in their body than when they entered

[Sparkie460]

That's funny my socks disintegrate in the washer. I put matching pairs in and poof, it's gone when I go to put it in the dryer. I think when it's spinning the water out, my sock goes with the water, into the cesspool.

[LiamJHayden]

>>>>checking the walls for blood splatterings<<<<

Nope.

[Guy13]

I have not.

[CoolCatMar1]

Nopeee