What do you think this is a sign of?

When I was a child, I was an active child, a leader, striving to be first everywhere, then at the age of 11 I was prescribed a drug called Benarol. It's like I lost my identity. I was zero in life in classes. I still can't get over the effects of that poisonous drug. What psychological problem is this? Since I live in the territory of the former Soviet republic, I suspect, even I am sure, that this was done by the authorities to make me proud. I'm not good at English, so I'm sorry

What do you think this is a sign of?
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