Are people like this intentionally?

[Anonymous]

Let’s say you’re in a down season of your life. During that time people have the most uplifting and encouraging things to say to you while they’re in a winning season of their life. They’ll tell you that everything will be okay, that everyone’s journey is different and that your time will come etc but the moment you go from being down to being up and winning, that energy changes. You get a pay raise at work, you get that house or apartment or car you want and suddenly you don’t get those same uplifting speeches or congratulations. It’s real mellow, like “Oh. That’s good.” But when things weren’t going well for you they had a lot to say.

[ManOnFire]

People like knowing that others are not doing well. There is a saying that goes "They wanna see you do better, but not better than them." It's the evil of the human heart, and it is indeed evil. Humans enjoy the suffering and bad news of others. Once you 'elevated' they weren't so happy.

I remember when I got my first place and was doing house shopping, people in the store would give me nasty looks and smirks as I passed by with a cart full of stuff, as if they were jealous or thought I was trying to showboat how much money I had or whatever, when I really was not. I'm not that kind of person. People hate seeing when others are doing well or have ability, especially if it is more than them, but they enjoy knowing someone is down. Remember, the human heart is wicked.

[Asker]

I work a cleaning job. For the past year I only made $18 an hour for that job and when I would talk about moving out and getting my own place to my sister and my mom they would say things like “You don’t make enough to move out. You would have to find another job that pays more because you’re not gonna get more than that doing what you do.” In other words saying $18 an hour is all I deserve for cleaning. Fast forward to today, we finally got a $4 pay raise and we’ll be getting another $1 raise next month. Now when I was making less than my sister it was okay. It was all “Things will get better.” When I told her and my mom the good news about my pay raise all my sister said was “mmm” and then started to go on and on about how I shouldn’t be making more than her because she has a degree and saying I’m gonna have to start doing more than what I already do at work to earn that raise. She then ended it with “$18 an hour is not bad. It’s a good starting rate.” But yet she doesn’t make that and she straight up told me $18 an hour wasn’t even enough to move out. Now that I make more, suddenly that pay rate isn’t bad.

[ManOnFire]

Congratulations on your pay raise. Having more money DOES help you move higher, so don't listen to them. They are jealous and prime examples of the wickedness in the human heart - and family is no exclusion. In fact they can be some of the worst.

Glad to hear you'll be able to get your own place. A little advice though so that you will always be ahead financially: have enough money saved to pay both your first and NEXT months rent, then on your third month you start paying with the money you immediately make every week. The reason why you want to do it this way is because during the two months that you use saved money to cover your first rent, you are building up your regularly work money to be able to comfortably pay your rent every month. Make sense?