How can someone be kind but not nice?

[Anonymous]

Shouldn’t we be kind and nice? I mean I’m a kind and nice person, but I get disrespected when I’m so nice to people. My older sister always said, “I’m not as nice as people think. I’m not.” She will give you a stern direct look in the eye. She kind of scares me. She would say she she’s kind not nice. She gets more respect than I do. What gives?

She told me I need to stop being so fucking nice to people, quit being a doormat because being nice is poor, cheap and useless. That’s how people are going to see me and I don’t wanna look easy. Don’t expect everyone to be nice to me and men will see that I will be lose and cheap if I don’t say no to sex.
Damn that was very harsh…. my sister can be brutally honest and she isn’t nice about it. She isn’t a jerk though. She’s actually sweet but she only shows it to people that deserves it.

[smashleyy]

Being kind gives me a more authentic vibe. Politeness, acts of service etc is coming from a genuine place in your heart while still being able set boundaries and say no when necessary whereas being nice is just another word for being a people pleaser. People pleasers have hidden motives behind their good deeds. Being a good person is really secondary, the main goal is wanting to be likeable and control others perception of you which is kinda manipulative.

[Agape93]

They're not the same. Let's say you got herpes after blowing a guy in a bathroom stall.

Nice would be me saying it's ok you couldn't have known, you'll find someone who won't mind.

Kind is me saying you were fucking stupid and messed up your health and dating prospects, but it can be treated with medication and caution.

The first ones a lie, the second is honesty.