Maybe some people were meant to fall in love but not be together. Discuss

[Confused201990]

just after peoples opinions on the subject

[Mesonfielde]

Love is a reaction to seeing an "ideal mate", meaning someone with an attractive appearance and an acceptable personality, and makes you think that you are in love, and you have enough contact with each other that you will get attached to the person mentally as well (like friendship).

The point is that if we assume that physical attraction is based on "beauty" which is an indicator for genetic compatibility and to have better offspring, then we can safely say that physical attraction can easily be one-sided. So that sort of rules out being together, in case the physical attraction isn't mutual in the first place.

But even if the attraction is mutual at first, one can have various flaws that would make him undesireable for the other, and so, even though they could have been in love, one side is not willing to accept it.

Finally, love is DESIRE, and desire can only be directed towards something you don't actually have. Hence why many people say the "flame and spark is gone". Emotions are temporal, they disappear after a while. The only thing that could keep people together is loyalty.. but many people are hedonists and are looking for "happiness and fun", and are willing to discard their decision on the long run.

LONG STORY SHORT: Love can easily be one-sided due to its nature, but if it's mutual, one can have serious flaws that the other would find unacceptable, and the feelings themselves can disappear after a while. Therefore, saying people were meant to fall in love is a false belief, as you could fall in love with anyone who match the physical (attraction), personal (an acceptable personality), and mental (attachment) criteria.

[Littletad]

That's very confusing. I could not fall with someone and not attempt to be with them. Just can't. I do believe in finding love and then losing it though. Is that what you meant? "Better to have love and lost, than never loved at all".

[jessthatgirl]

Well you need to work on keeping your love alive. You know what I mean? There will always be tough times and it's just about facing them together and understanding one another and just fighting to stay in love. Not everybody you fall in love with you end up with because it depends if the other person is willing to fight as much for you as you are for them.

[hippychick21]

Nope. Love is an intentional choice, not a feeling. it is not something you stumble upon, you can choose to love or not love anyone. Some people we find easier to love, and therefor call it "falling in love." But why would we be designed to fall in love with someone, but then never be able to spend the rest of our life with them?

[Anonymous]

love isn't enough. it never has been and never will be. there's just so much more to relationships than that

[foolycooly1001]

i don't believe anything is meant to be.

[Gregs]

sure