Do you believe some people can be unlucky when it comes to love?

Question

I feel like if that's true, I am because I've had some toxic relationships but i know it's because i should've worked more on myself and for nearly 2 years i have been especially with self love and self concept but i meet a lot of guys that only want sex or seem to not want to commit anymore as in dating or a relationship. Keep in mind im an average girl, not a bombshell model but im a little curvy, i fix my hair everyday and am natural. I have some guys say hi and smile at me but nobody really asks me out and i get it some guys are shy but i dont know if im doing something wrong.

Twalli · Accepted Answer

No. I think it is lack of understanding the people who are good for you. You keep getting in relationships that end in breakups because what you want is not what you need and once the infatuation fades the relationship fizzles out. Also, needs change, and some people don't realize that until after a relationship ends because it no longer fits their needs. As you grow older, your needs are less likely to change. For example, after breaking up with her boyfriend for 4 years, since the start of college, my sister had a bit of a problem. She needed to be put on a pedestal and seen as the best thing to happen to the guy she dated. She needed this, and dated two guys because of it. Yet, she got over her issues and is now dating a guy who says she's the best thing that ever happened to him, but he has enough of his life together that their breakup wouldn't hurt terribly much. He has a good job, her last two didn't.
As for not getting a boyfriend/girlfriend that comes from shyness and overconfidence. If you think you are a 10, but you are more of a 6 and you shoot for 10s, you will not get dates becasue you overshoot what you could actually obtain. Shyness is bad in another way. You find plenty of people you might like to date, but are too shy to make a move on them. I was nervous talking to people, so much so that a girl I had a crush on since 7th grade took me until 10th grade to ask out.

lightbulb27 · Accepted Answer

yes and no. Anyone can have an accident. But if you can't drive, run into things all the time, too afraid to drive, or get lots of tickets... it's on you to up your skills.

You said it well, work on yourself... look for what is controlling and limiting you. Work on your social skills. Dating and relationship are a set of skills. Yes, there are a lot of corrupt guys, women have corrupted them as well as society, so it is probably harder than ever. But it's always been a game to get what you want. To do that, you have to work hard to get what you want and keep it.

Two birds sat on a wire and wanted breakfast. They spotted a worm, but one bird was shy and scared to swoop down to get food... there could be cats around, wasn't so confident in her flying. The other was skilled and aggressive. Which bird got the worm?

It's as simple as that... "Unlucky", I'm too short, too fat, not pretty enough, not smart enough... is an excuse to justify not wanting to make changes...

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Yes. Me for example.
The problem with my love life isn’t that I can’t get anyone it’s just that the people that approach me aren’t what I look for in a partner…for example, dms… I despise them.. why? Because they’re not a great way to get to know someone. I’m the type of gal that would prefer to meet someone in person.. I want to be able to see if I feel that “chemistry” with you instead of forcing one online…I don’t even know how they talk I don’t even know how they verbally express themselves when they talk.. when they message me I can read what they say but it’s so different when it comes out of their mouth.. I need to see and feel how passionate they are when they talk about certain things.. I want to be able to read their facial expressions and reactions… that’s why everytime I get a dm from a random person trying to get my attention I prefer not to respond because it’s exhausting. The “hey wyd” or “hey what’s up” and the “that’s cool, how you been?” It’s so boring.

That’s why I consider my love life to be unlucky. I just haven’t met the right person yet.

And no it’s not the people’s fault for messaging me and me having to ignore their messages it’s literally not them it’s just me.. my preference.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Yes incredibly, my family is plenty of single mom's with like 2 to 5 kids each. Only 2 person in my generation are married. 1 in mine was but she got divorced after he cheated and 1 person in the grandkids generation. My grandpa has 25 kids not all with the same woman obviously some were after he got married to my Grandma. Yh my whole family is cursed. And my uncle's and cousins and brothers have like 2 to 4 baby mama's not overexaggerating. It's too much to be a coincidence. We're cursed. on my dad's side it's not that bad like a lot of then are married all the women the men are basically repopulating the earth at.

jennifer_bloom · Answer

You do not have to be attractive or slim, if you work hard and avoid abusive people, you can find a husband.

ohsheeT · Answer

I don't think it's really unlucky I think that we're not being honest with ourselves when we just let somebody take us or we just pick somebody we all know what we want in a relationship there's times where you just have to turn that person down no matter what and you have to be honest with yourself you know down deep that that person is not going to be good for you you're not going to be good for that person so why even get into something like that because somewhere down the road it's going to become even worse and even worse I mean could you imagine getting a boyfriend things start happening you're not really for sure if you like the guy or not anymore and things start getting out of control and he started arguing and this and that and like you said toxic you say get the f*** out and a week later you find out you're pregnant I mean you got to be careful of all that s*** so it's and I guarantee that some guy walked up to you tomorrow and said I want to date you but you knew down deep he was no good and you said no I'm sorry I can't date you I would guarantee you within a week to two weeks to a month you would have almost the right boyfriend coming to you or you running into him someplace or you meeting him someplace not the guy you just said no thank you to I'm in a brand new guy because now you have that positive energy you have that that wisdom and that control in that confidence to say no I personally believe that there's a couple things that you have to go through before you can get that guy but I think for some reason you are going to attract toxic guys and I think maybe that's just how you might communicate I'm not sure I think if you were to get a little bit more confidence I think a couple things but I don't know

Rose_84 · Answer

True they only want sex and nothing more.

But don't get fooled, even if they don't want sex, they still want to waste your time for a few years because they feel 'empty' or lonely.

Then they'll move on after finding a better option. That's why I always test them in unexpected ways and see their true colors and hidden intentions.

Babygirl_S · Answer

I also feel unlucky in love. My ex was a handsome half-white guy who broke up with me because I refused to have pre-marital sex. He could have married me without a "test drive". He was so dreamy and I lost him. I feel like I am doomed because I won't sleep with anyone before marriage and modern guys are not into that.
I fear being rejected repeatedly even after having sex before marriage so I'd rather not. I am too emotional to have a high body count.
Additionally, I have started liking men with blue eyes the most and they prefer blue-eyed women. I would be so lucky if I had blue eyes. Not because I want them for myself but because the guys I fancy a lot want that feature. If I am ever able to attract the type of guy I want, he will most certainly dump me for lacking that trait or not having sex with him.

bademoxy · Answer

the sexual revolution has ruined relationships for everyone, just as the Frankfurt School intended.
mass media is monkey see , monkey do. You know how monkeys mate in Africa ; each female gets group inseminated by the entire male tribe. Since the boomers, men get inundated by promiscuity and misled into feeling LTR/marriage is now unattainable for them , so they just pursue flings as far their status allows.
thence,"it takes a village to raise a child"-Hillary. We are as good as dead, culturally speaking.

dragoblack · Answer

Myself, case and point. I'm 30 looking for a happy wholesome relationship and I have never had a girlfriend in big part due to my horrible luck. It has either been not interested, didn't see me ever in a romantic way, found me physically unattractive, been ghosted when asking about hobbies & interests (92% of the time this happens if they were interested), she's not into guys, completely ace with no interest in romance, already with someone, told i was too nice of a person to be with, told that guys like me who want a happy & healthy relationship are boring because we de-escalate any drama to avoid it, she turns out to be underage (so major nope on my end), because i didn't want to hookup, but mainly comes down to having difficulty finding mutual attraction.

Lionman95 · Answer

Yes 100% I think some people have more luck than others because of the end of the day you need to have at least some luck that the right person falls for you at the right time and moment.

There are always situations and constellations that make dating harder for some than others.

CA4444 · Answer

Yeah, I wouldn’t say unlucky though, we all have different life experiences and you can’t compare yours with the ‘perfect’ relationship of the couple next door. There’s an element of destiny I believe, and also of self work and work in the relationship

MCheetah · Answer

I am. I mean, I KNOW women don't like short, ugly, old men like myself. But sh*t man, even Adolf Hitler had a woman willing to f*ck him. Even a piece of sh*t like George Floyd, or the owner of Monsanto, or Bobby Kotick of Activision-Blizzard, had women willing to f*ck and love them. So... I just don't know.

Ill_made_Knight · Answer

I think some people try to work so hard at being impressie that they forget to be themseles. Then you've failed and it wasn't even you that was in there.
Sounds simple, but it's not. People get inside their own heads and it gets worse, kinda like people who really know their stuff but panic on exam day.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

Luck is a small part of meeting good people and making meaningful connections. The rest is up to you. Figure out a way to initiate with guys you’re interested in. Men’s lives are being ruined for approaching the wrong women, so only the idiots are still putting themselves out there foolishly anymore. So if you like idiots, just keep doing what you’re doing. Otherwise you’re gonna hafta take some chances to make sure good guys know that you’re interested.

Anonymous · Answer

Just a few bad experiences, but you seem like a very confident and compassionate girl. You do not get insecure about it, and you are comfortable with your sexuality. We all get a little nervous when talking to someone we feel for, so I would not say that is a problem. You are willing to try and fail, which is solid quality, rather than sitting back and waiting for prince charming to come to you. I think you have good character.

Synikal · Answer

If u feel this way. Imagine how some guys feel. Not all of us have that chest pump syndrome. I believe it goes both ways and people believe they are happy with what others tell them what they should be happy with instead of getting to know themselves and building into their likes.

exitseven · Answer

Sometimes people are attracted to the same toxic person. They date the same type of person over and over again hoping that this time it will be different. It is not luck. However , you can meet somebody who is dishonest and for whatever reason are attracxted to them and it could end badly. Sometimes it is just the luck of the draw.

Havthrills · Answer

I've been really unlucky. It's to the point where it seems like I just look for the wrong ones. Or maybe it's me. You sound like a cute woman. I haven't actually seen you but going off your descriptions.

AsaKyo · Answer

I personally don't think so because I believe anyone can find love. I think the problem usually lies within the person themselves as to why they're having a bad luck streak. They might be too dependent, have low self-esteem, be arrogant or conceited, indecisive, depressed, etc the list goes on. Some people are just shitty people and good people run into those regardless. It really just depends, I guess.

Bricealan · Answer

PROBABLY TOO HARD ON YOURSELF, AND MAYBE TOO SELF CRITICAL. TRY TO RELAX AND YOU WILL MEET SOMEONE EQUALLY NICE.

JosyJosy · Answer

Yep love is hard. I'm hope I don't have to date anymore

tafarrier · Answer

Im the unluckiest.

2 left for bigger better deals , guy with rich family. my wife had our daughter , seeded by another man. i had a fling with her friend, cut short, got her wet, no nuts. SAD Face.

i share my wife , she got DPd, MMF and was in her pus he was in rear.

But

I did tap my daughters girlfriend, taking her home, and ontop of me. . and a Asian gal picked me up from bus stop. from sweety sex,

Jennz6 · Answer

Hi Paula, don’t worry about it, you will meet a guy. Put your sexy dress 👗 on and smile 😊

Do you believe some people can be unlucky when it comes to love?

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