Sometimes people sign up to be the other lover. Other times they really didn’t know. I never hear much from the angle of the other man/woman that didn’t know they were the other man/woman. I’d like to hear some people’s stories. How did u find out u were the other lover? I found out I was the other woman when a woman and baby showed up to my doorstep accusing me of ruining her family. I had no idea who she was even talking about and thought she had the wrong person but she did have the right person. I was dating her husband at the time, but knew him by a totally different name! I only realized after she showed me pictures. We were only dating for about 2 months and I was able to clear up any other questions or concerns she had and never heard from either one of them again after that day. (Apart from him attempting to call me a couple hours after she left) turns out she suspected he was cheating from around 6 months prior and I wasn’t the only one he was seeing since I only started dating him 2 months prior. It was my first time ever being in such a situation and I remember thinking how crazy it all was. I had been to his job to have lunch with him, spoken to him on the phone almost every day, he had been to my house a couple times, I had been to where I thought was his house as well. The man really was living 2 lives. Here I was thinking I’d never be a side chick.