Boyfriend won't stay with me when I'm sick? What do I do or say to him?

Question

I got sick recently and my boyfriend doesn't want to be anywhere near me. He said he'll bring me food and whatever but when I asked for him to stay with me because I feel lonely and shitty right now. He doesn't want to get sick which is understandable. My previous boyfriend of 5 years stayed with me and cooked and made me tea. Maybe I'm just used to that. He was definitely more mature. I know it seems ridiculous but I don't know should I be upset about this? What do I do or say to him?

integrale77 · Accepted Answer

First of all in the midst of a pandemic did you take a test or get a doctor's diagnosis as to the cause of the sickness?
If not your boyfriend was doing the right thing and considering it could have been covid and being careful!

As a comparison my girlfriend came down with covid earlier this year it started with her son then her then her mum in the same household. I didn't want to come down with it do stayed out the house but tried to help out a little by going on run's to the shop for them.
My girlfriend completely understood the distancing we talked over the phone plenty and talked through the window.
If it was something less communicable then maybe I'd be going in the house.

Adam1978 · Accepted Answer

It's not his job until you share a life together. Aslong as you both live apart he do not need to take care of you when you are sick. Him helping you with grocery shopping is him helping you. I am sure if he got sick he wouldn't bug you about it. Want someone to take care of you, share home with them.

LovingLoverReturned · Accepted Answer

Ahhh yes... not sure how this will work in family or married life... How about a mask and hygiene and some distance, y'all can still watch a movie together... maybe just no kissing unfortunately...

But when he has a family, will he leave his kids? Lol... of his pregnant wife has a cold or wife in general does...

WhatTheHeckkkk · Accepted Answer

I totally understand not wanting to get sick. Some people just can’t risk it, and I think you should understand that…

And I don’t understand why you would break up with someone over that. Simply communicate it with him that you would like it if he took care of you more while you’re sick.

Friendlybro79 · Answer

Straight talk not meant to be mean. You said it's understandable that he doesn't want to get sick and you know it seems ridiculous and also complain about this.

Especially in the world of COVID this is more understanding. Now, if he got sick and expected you to take care of him then this would be ridiculous.

You're an adult and he shouldn't need to get himself sick because you are. Also I have never in my adult life needed anyone to take care of me when I have a cold. If I did I'd be in a hospital.

I know you're upset and this sounds harsh but I'm just being honest by saying this isn't something to say he's less mature about. He's being mature by not getting himself sick and potentially others.

GingerGuy · Answer

"doesn't want to get sick which is understandable" - apparently it's not to you lol. That's the bottom line, and some people are just like this. And I don't believe it has to do with "maturity" or how much "they care about you" at all, it's just the way they are. My mom is like this. If you have the sniffles even, she won't come anywhere near you or be around you lol. You'd think she would die she's that serious about it.

CubsterShura · Answer

Honestly I consider it a red flag. My boyfriend specifically came to take care of me when I had the flu. Even when I told him I worry about getting him sick he's like I can freaking cough in his mouth and he won't mind xD but yeah I'd be very bothered by my man not staying around me, UNLESS he is prone to getting that sickness himself from past experience.

20yearsolder · Answer

It's pretty nice that he's willing to bring you food and stuff. Maybe he doesn't want to get sick. If that's not the kind of guy you want to be with for the rest of your life, maybe you should not be dating him because he's probably not going to change

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Yes you should be upset.

Good people stay and pamper their sick SO.

Besides, whats he gonna do if you get married and live together? Lock you in a room over the flu? Not let you use the bathroom or kitchen? Seems a tad harsh...

I don't think he's thought his decisions through, seems like a red flag.

megabamse · Answer

I think that's smart of him. Why risk getting sick yourself? He is talking care of you by getting you things you need. Sort of selfish of you to want him to get sick in order for you to not feel lonely.

artstatues · Answer

If you're sick you should protect your boyfriend and your loved ones from getting sick by staying in isolation for a few days. Don't be selfish, he already offered to bring you food

metalhead_66 · Answer

Well, it seems like he cares, since he's bringing you food and all. But with COVID-19 right now I think it's understandable that he's taking precautions. I guess that if COVID didn't exist he would have stayed

LUPITA00 · Answer

maybe if it bothers you that much tell him, Its understandable he doesn't want to get sick cause who likes being sick? I don't think you should be that bothered by it. Just say I want you here

Timmy44 · Answer

He’s just protecting him self from getting sick to may be his employer has a strict sick time only a Couple days off being sick before they get fired or get on a program or you can’t be sick for any all distance time or you get fired my job has it very strict sick day policy only six per year or you’re on the program and if you’re off sick etc. you’re fired

Iron_Man · Answer

He doesn’t wanna get sick it’s understandable maybe he can’t afford to get sick maybe he’s got diabetes and he just doesn’t wanna get sick or another illness

UniquelyBasic · Answer

Its not a problem, he doesn't want to get sick and its not like he said he doesn't want anything to do with you, he offered to still bring food.

Mango-man · Answer

Well, tell him how you feel. Tell him that right now you need company instead of providing food. Tell him you wouod do the same for him.

Flower7 · Answer

It’s normal to not want to be around a sick person…especially ever since COVID started. I don’t feel like he’s doing anything wrong.

SmokyOne · Answer

I personally think it's messed up you'd risk getting someone you care about unnecessarily sick cause you're lonely 🙁  Use FaceTime or whatever. Cope more.

Anonymous · Answer

then that person is not the right person. My favorite bird was sick too, and the person I was dating got into a fight instead of taking care of me. then he became a ghost.
I'm going through two pains right now first the person I was dating has left me like a ghost and the second is my bird's disease

Hangry06 · Answer

So now wanting to protect yourself from diseases and take care of your health is a red flag for people?🤔 Best to stay single

PaganWarrior · Answer

You clearly don't understand and he doesn't have to stay with you while you're sick. He doesn't want to get sick.

Wise4myage · Answer

He doesn't want to get sick, and who wants company when they are sick?

Anonymous · Answer

See how they are always comparing the last one to the current one... this is part of the inability to bond showing itself.

Dkc123 · Answer

Sounds like he's more mature and realise the situation which around the world.

SignedAutographs · Answer

He isn't required to do so. And it's smart not to be with someone who's currently sick. Especially when they're not of the same blood

Prg11 · Answer

You're probably one of those girls who think they can get a higher IQ/higher value nan, and then boss him around.

fred_durst · Answer

just tell him exactly what u read above , your ex better than him after telling him like that , lemme know how it goes

AndrésC64 · Answer

I wouldn't want to stay either. I avoid sick people at all costs.

Anonymous · Answer

You already said you understand he doesn't want to be sick, it's simple. If your previous boyfriend was better and mature why aren't you still with him?

Jessegirl1998 · Answer

Dump him. If he can’t handle you while your not at your best. He doesn’t deserve you at your best.

NameofAce · Answer

İt is simple. Just say hım. You should say that I need to you

annabananna · Answer

Some people can’t afford to be sick and miss work.

xJayleenx · Answer

Man im sorry that sucks just tell him how you feel

Sketti2021 · Answer

Tell him to hit the road 😤

noohair · Answer

Not marriage material. I don't think he loves you.

Anonymous · Answer

It depends on the type of illness

888theGreat · Answer

he doesn't want it

EzNamirimEzDibirim · Answer

Leave him

fireforeffect · Answer

Yes I would.

Boyfriend won't stay with me when I'm sick? What do I do or say to him?

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