How do I find a girlfriend who doesn't mind being the responsible one?

[Lynx122]

Personally I like to feel like I'm competent and I'm in charge of my life but I get worn down by everyday things quickly. I can't take care of myself and think of other people too at the same time. Someone told me I should look for a girlfriend who doesn't mind taking care of others or likes it even. I wouldn't mind giving it a try and seeing if something good comes out of it but I don't know how to even start :). It's not like I'm not responsible I don't do stupid things but someone who has the overview so I can relax my mind a bit :)

I don't know maybe this won't work out at all but I'll give it a try

[sage2021]

Did I understand this right that you are disabled in some way?

Even people that don't have disabilities are having a very hard time trying to find a love relationship.

In my family, there are one's that have one disability or another. But the one that has ADHD ended up getting married finally.

Another half brother is slow. Like it took him 10 years to get a 4 years college degree. But he did end up getting married and has two children. But she lost a lot of weight (she was pretty heavy), fixed herself up, then divorced him.🤷🏼‍♀️

So, there are some women that are willing to be with a disabled person. As long as you tell her exactly what you told us just now, she can decide if she wants to get involved with you or not.

You don't want to end up with someone who will have a relationship with you only to turn around and decides she doesn't. That would be cruel.

My last boyfriend had ADHD and I admit, it's very hard to live with someone in the same home that has that affliction. However, I did everything in my power to make his life comfortable for him, even though sometimes he drove me crazy because of his ADHD.

I don't know if you are physically disabled or what because my opinion could change if it's a physical disability.

I prefer to refer to it as differently abled ok?

[Lynx122]

Yes I have autism I didn't think it was that big of a problem because I can take care of myself pretty well. But in a relationship it actually is a big deal because I use up most of my energy taking care of myself so it's harder for me to always be aware of everything and take care of others at the same time.

[Crimsyjo]

I don't think it will get hard. Women are natural nurturers. And I know from your activity here your a super decent guy with a good logical mindset and self awareness. I don't think you need to specifically look for a woman "to take care of you". You just - like the rest of us- need to find a woman that compliments and understands your needs. Saying you want a woman "to be the responsible one" makes you sound a little less masculine (sorry. in my opinion) yet I know you don't mean it that way at all!!! You don't need a woman more responsible than most women are anyways. I get what your friend means by one that cares or likes to care. Translate that to someone empathic and considerate.

Like myself.. I want to feel safe and secure with a man. And in return I want to nurture. Go out my way to make him happy when he's sad, cuddle him when he's had a hard day, give him space if he needs space, find ways to make him laugh. And do same back. I think maybe you mean someone who can do that for you but not need too much back (as it would drain you emptionally). It's certainly not impossible. And your young enough and attractive enough. But haha the finding is the hard part.

I think you will do alright tho. Your not desperately seeking but your now open to the possibility. Could be an interesting new year for you!

[Lynx122]

Thanks :) I think she just meant someone who can take on more than we can because we're both disabled. I want to do my part but sometimes I can't I need someone who understands that and won't mind it since a lot of women think it's not attractive or ok if they have to take over. Yes I'll just try and be open minded and figure it out slowly :S

[AI Opinion]

You're looking for a partner who's like the head cheerleader *and* the team captain? That's quite a combo! 😉 Finding someone who enjoys taking charge and has that nurturing vibe is all about knowing where to look and how to approach it. Look for someone who naturally enjoys organizing and caring for others and who finds joy in it. Be honest about your needs and what you can bring to the relationship. It's all about balance and making sure that both parties are happy. Communicate with some spice, charm, and confidence—those are like lovebombing for your relationship potential! 🌟 So, go on, charm someone with your honest intentions and see where it leads! 💕

[Jamie05rhs]

I actually want to be the "responsible one" in a relationship. I enjoy it very much. It energizes me and motivates me.

... But only if she is not completely irresponsible! She has to be responsible, too!

[Lynx122]

I'd like that too but I can't.

[Jamie05rhs]

Aww. That's okay, man.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

Uhhhhhh taking you literally it's probably a bad start here! A girlfriend is not a tool nor a healer! 😅 Okay, I mean what Crimsy said, everyone wants someone considerate, on both sides of a relationship, that's just sound normality

[Nikki1989]

Look for someone who demonstrates maturity, empathy, and a willingness to compromise.