How do you distinguish between the drama of immature girls and the stability of mature women?

[MzAsh]

Often, the maturity of the women men want to date reflects their own maturity levels. Understanding this can help in identifying why some relationships feel chaotic versus those that are more harmonious and supportive.

Do you see a correlation between your personal growth and the maturity of your partners?

[Sun_Kim-Ai]

In my personal experiences, I have always been attracted to and in relationships with older women because they had a stabilizing and regulating influence on me.

I think I've grown into the person I am today - calm, collected, with eyes on the whole picture in e every situation - is thanks to those women and what they taught me.

Those experiences greatly shaped what I look for in any kind of relationship with a woman, be it romantic or platonic - I find myself very comfortable with women who have clear goals and how to reach them, who know what they want and what they don't like, who have no issues letting me know what they won't accept and/or tolerate and have their own thing going. Usually it's older women who are like that, also because of experience, but I've met some younger women who were like that as well.

Honestly, I am turned off by immature and fickle women, who don't know what they want or change their mind all the time; or that depend on me for everything (I don't mean economically, I mean emotionally and psychologically) and make me the only focus in their life. I shouldn't be their father, I have three daughters already to raise, and even then I want them to be independent, successful women on their own.

[SixFootSexy]

The only difference is mature women aren't fighting other women or self-sabotaging. They have experience to know themselves and not get caught up in petty things that don't matter. They respect their partner and give him the treatment they want him to receive.

I don't think my personal experience of growth has much correlation to maturity of partners, beyond in my early 20's I learned that a woman 'being hot' isn't enough to be in a relationship for. She's also got to have brains and virtue or it's just not worth it.

[DishLady]

The glitch in the question is that mature women aren't as "exciting" to guys as the crazy immature girls are. Just look at every pappy dating a crazy young thing who could be his daughter? Libido is triggered by the drama of being with that kind of gal.

And for those of us who would rather be ladies who don't want or need the drama, love the romance but want to be treated with respect... it's super slim pickings. By the time the "good guy" get to us their hearts and souls have been ravaged by the lunatics out there...

[MzAsh]

But if they’re choosing the lunatics, how can they even be the good guy? The good guys aren’t interested in these women, and those are the men mature ladies should choose.

[DishLady]

It's not rocket science. It's a matter of what gets the guy's compass pointing due north -- the cute bouncy young thing who makes him feel like he's invented the sun and moon.

It's not something that determined whether the guy is "good" to begin with. They like to feel special too.

But then that special feeling gets all caught up in games and nonsense that they learn from crazy gal #1... #2... #52... And their guy friends add their opinions about navigating the dating mine field... And you've got all the guys who are essentially burnt out and no longer relationship material.

[MzAsh]

Of course men want to feel special, but they’ve always lost value in my book when that’s the way they want it, by the little girls.

[DishLady]

It's not 100% on them. Older women also get burned by bad guys... and "mature" to lose faith and hope in finding "a good guy"... It's a nasty little Catch22 situation.

[AnonAndrew]

@DishLady
Well, that's not because they find their immature behavior "exciting." It's because they're young and hot, heh.

[Ariesman81]

@DishLady Thank you for being able to see both sides of the coin.

[MzAsh]

It’s not really about age. Women find younger men hotter too, but it’s all about whether or not you’re smart enough and mature enough to see that they’re too immature mentally and emotionally.

[AnonAndrew]

@MzAsh
Studies actually show that men are most attracted to young women, while women are most attracted to men a few years older, regardless of age.

I find your claim that a person isn't "smart and mature enough" if they have much younger partners a bit odd. I've seen both men and women who are smart and mature with much younger partners.

[MzAsh]

Did you catch my first sentence?

[AnonAndrew]

@MzAsh
I did. Then I read the second one as well.

[MzAsh]

Well, again, this was sent a conversation about age. It’s about maturity. Two different things.

[DishLady]

“Mature” is a state of mind but too many people THINK they’re mature and they’re not, regardless of how old they are. For example trolling and dragging out a convo on someone’s random comment at all hours? Immature. Let’s call it a night already, shall we?

@MzAsh and @AnonAndrew, no one has to read every line with a fine-toothed comb. It’s just g@g. As for “hot,” @AnonAndrew it’s 2025. There are a lot of scorchers in their 40s. Don’t toss the lady out with the bathwater.

@ariesman81 😉 I try.

[MzAsh]

Yes, let’s stick to the discussion I started, which is what how men’s maturity, or lack thereof, influences their choice in women.

[Ariesman81]

Alright... less mature men typically chose masculine argumentative women. The women who, on average, have control issues.

[Justneedtokno]

I have yet to understand this, but I do have some really great close friends that have mature conversations. Think about the conversations you have I believe

[HungTexan]

There’s some validity to your premise regarding maturity. I was personally drawn to more mature women even at a young age, and the longevity of my marriage is likely reflected in the maturity of my wife. However, I’m not sure it explains some older men’s desire to date young girls. Does it mean that they are reverting to a younger maturity level as they age, or is it just a desire to relive that stage of their lives?

[Grond21]

It depends on why they want them. It's reasonable for a woman to want someone who is as mature as her, and if she's seeking that maturity itself then there's no issue. If she's doing it because it helps her cover up her own issues or she thinks someone like that has more money, for example, then it's not a good reason

[conanbdetective]

Usually, those with clearer wants or needs trend a little older. Starting in their 30's, they start to figure it out. When it's younger women, they like adventure and experiences and their wants bleed into their needs. But drama never goes away, no matter the age.

[Nikki1989]

It all comes down to emotional intelligence, self-awareness, and life experience.

[NicholasRedone]

Her attitude - if a hot women is as humble and quiet as a nerd 🤓 woman - without being one - that's a mature woman - yet still playful when she needs to be 👋🏻✋🏻😏♀️

[NathanDavis]

my car is either on fire... or not on fire

[AnonAndrew]

How do you distinguish between maturity and immaturity?

I think it's pretty obvious...

[RingOfFire]

Personally I like a little bit of both in a woman. Keeps things crisp both in and out of the bedroom. 🙂

[MikeRJ]

Chronological age doesn't always correlate with maturity. I know some 21-year-olds who act more mature and have it together more than some 50-year-olds.

[Vegasrunner]

TBH all women crave drama. As a man it's your job to not get caught up in it and focus on your mission.

[DrPepper12]

Look at her friends. That will tell you all you need.

[virgo2267]

Let’s just put it this way…
Girls want attention
Women want respect

[Manuelwe]

How honest they are. No time wasting and love to cook you a meal before sex

[Intheclouds00]

There is no difference.