Is it a bad thing if my boyfriend has told me multiple times if a video game character is hot, as in 'she's got a nice ass'?

[Anonymous]

He's seen video game females and will say, 'i have to say she's got a NICE ass' or 'oh yeah, I got a good look at her ass' and I questioned him about it but he says it was a joke. He said before when I got really nervous about cheating and him checking out other girls that he doesn't really feel and emotional connection with other girls while in a relationship but also that he doesn't really feel personally attracted to other women when he's with me. I don't know if that just applies to real life women or if he really is joking and thought I'd find it funny and agree. He says he only feels sexual to me and others dont interest him. There's a bit more but maybe not needed to say so ill leave it at that.

Updates

7 mo

Its just annoying to ke and I dont want to be a crazy person thinking its cheating since he's already said that he's just acknowledging that he didn't notice a video game character was attractive like that or that its funny that a virtual character is built nicely. I just can't get it out of my head, if he looks at fiction like that then how do I know what he does for real women? Its like a cat in a video game is still cute even if it isn't real because its still depicting a real thing.

[Finchie40]

Would you rather him keep it to himself and masturbate to her when you aren’t looking? It’s a cartoon character , I don’t think you have anything to worry about , if you are that concerned , dress up as that cartoon character and see if he tears your ass up , if not , he loves the cartoon character but not you lol

[Asker]

Its just gross and immature to go after a fictional woman just because omg she's fictional. Its still a woman, just like looking at a picture online of a real woman. 99 percent sure he doesn't master bate to them, he has assured me it was just an objective joke thing.

[Asker]

I also think its weird to dress up as another woman and then let someone fuck me pretending they're fucking that woman like why am I even dating them.

[Finchie40]

It’s still you that they are into and having sex with , even if you dress up as someone else , it just spices up things. Also ask yourself this question? Do you ever find other guys’ attractive and think Damn he is fine? Because if that’s the case you are just as bad as your boyfriend is. So it’s one thing to look and check someone out but it’s a different story if they acted on it. Then yes you have every right to be upset about that if they did. Now I disagree with you that it’s weird that your boyfriend is turned on by a cartoon character , but unfortunately there are a lot of people that are , remember Jessica Rabbit from Who framed Roger Rabbit , Guys’ went nuts over her , she was a cartoon sex icon. But again it’s just a cartoon , she isn’t real , so all I am saying is you shouldn’t be that upset over it , I am sure you saw celebrities on tv that you find very attractive whether
You keep it to yourself or not , you are still attracted to someone else other than your boyfriend , but all is good unless you try acting on it.

[Asker]

Yeah I mean for the most part I agree, its just there's so many sexual images of fictional women out there and I know he's jacked off to fictional women before, he has assured me that doing that now is going too far but it just still feels off. I have found men real or not objectively attractive but its not like I said 'oh leon from resident evil is so hot, his arms though like damn' its a passing thought, saying it out loud means you thought about it enough to do that. I dont want to feel this stressed over a fictional woman, not my goal. My goal is to find a man who isn't easily swayed to act on thoughts and still only has the desire to actually do sex with me. Natrual attraction is bound to happen, it happened before me and it will happen while im here. I totally get that both genders can find their partner attractive enough to fuck and date then find they're satisfied and dont have that urge with anyone else. But saying out loud that someone else is hot is just a boundary crossed for me, it feels like he is thinking about them in a certain way because he has before we dated so thats why im worried. Didn't have this fear until he started being way too not joking sounding with saying someone's ass was nice 'for a video game character' its a shame too since its not a super crazy thing that should be broken up with for, I just dont want to be plagued with the thought that he's just out here enjoying pics of women just because its fine, they're fictional. Like scroll past and keep that thought to yourself, if you think about acting on it in any way or actually do then just break up with me. People leave the relationship with their mind first and if you have sexual thoughts about someone real or not then its kinda doomed from there in my opinion

[Asker]

Its also different if she's a real depicting of a woman yk other than a hot bunny rabbit. I think its would be funny to be like damn Jake sully from avatar is hot, cause he's not even human and yeah omg Jessica rabbit is hot because like she is and she's a rabbit so whatever, you're kinda weird if you actually jack off to that. Its just a boundary and it gets to where a line is crossed on if its funny anymore or if I feel like you're not just pointing out something objective and just being subjective on your thoughts

[Asker]

Just remembered Jessica rabbit is not the actual basketball bunny, nevermind lol she was the red dress other one

[Asker]

Basically noticing others attractiveness is normal but if you're happy and fulfilled in your relationship then you dont think about or care how attractive someone else is, period. I notice all the time but I dont care that there are more attractive or just attractive men out there, I dont want to go after anyone else and im happy with what I found so no one else matters to me emotionally or sexually. Its all objectively an opinion because im human and I have respect for my partner to not just spat out all the time if I noticed someone was attractive in my opinion. Sure as he'll dont act on it because idc and have desire for one person. Yk, its the actual want for others thats the issue, thinking about it or actually doing so.

[Asker]

I also think role-playing and dressing up is fine, just maybe not my thing. Its one thing to jack off in private tot he character itself because then thats just you being into the character not the hot outfit and not me. At least with me dressing up like an attractive character then its getting to enjoy a hot outfit on someone you fidn attractive and getting to actually have sex with them, im involved meaning he would want to still have sex with me, just in a got outfit that character design came up with first. Pretending im that character seems too far but maybe every once in a while, but still just odd to pretend you're fucking someone else, makes me think you wished they were real and thats too much.

[Finchie40]

Wow I wish all girls’ were like you , I honestly see your point of view and i get what you are saying , my opinion has changed for the fact that you said he masturbates to these cartoons or whatever , that to me is a red flag , so I can see why you are upset at him for that and that is clearly disrespectful, in my opinion as well. Mainly because when I am in a relationship with a girl , she is my top priority , and I honestly do not masturbate when I am in a relationship with a girl because I save myself for her , I don’t need anyone else to fulfill my sexual desires other than my partner. If I came home from work and I caught her masturbating to some cartoon or celebrity on tv , I would feel upset and disrespected as well , as to why she is doing that when she has me. So the fact that your boyfriend masturbates to these cartoon characters or other girls’ is a red flag that he isn’t fulfilled by you , he just likes the convenience of you , I can’t tell you to dump him , but if I was in that situation, I would dump her because it’s clearly disrespectful, and another thing I don’t do when I am in a loving relationship with a girl , is blurt out that someone is hot or attractive, has a nice ass , etc. in front of her because that’s clearly disrespectful, people that think that it’s ok to do , do not have any respect for anyone but themselves and they shouldn’t be in a relationship with anyone. My love for my partner is the same love I want to receive in return , you will not receive that being with someone that only likes the convenience of you. I dumped girls’ that clearly were disrespectful that expected me to be respectful to her , but she didn’t do the same for me , so I dumped her and realized there are better girls’ out there

[Asker]

As far as I know that behavior was when he was single and the most he's done with me is point out if a fictional character specifically has a good body. Its just odd and if he does it again after I've already brought up that I dont appreciate it then ill leave, if he ever actually goes as far to save or look at pictures of these women in some type of way or master bate then im out as well. I trust him to not do that, not as a 'oh I can't because I have a girlfriend' but as a 'I just simply dont have the interest because im too into my girlfriend'. I need to relax a little bit because we aren't in love, at least I dont think he loves me so I can chill. I just dont want to continue to put effort into someone if ill get beat out by a woman who isn't even real. Thanks for your opinions though, helps me think

[RandomGirl42]

I don't know if this helps or not but when I was back in college (5 years ago) there was a study by a psychiatrist (or psychologist , I forget) who came home early one day and caught her boyfriend masturbating to some cartoon char on TV. At first she was all horrified, understandably so, but then found it intriguing and did all types of research on it. So, what your boyfriend is doing doesn't seem uncommon but yes, I can see where it would be bothersome. I guess, like anything, it just comes down to what we as individuals are comfortable with. 🤷‍♀️

[Asker]

To each their own but I hate it, if I ever find out thats happening im breaking up. Cheating is not only about having actual sex with a real woman yk, just immature and a single activity to do stuff like that

[Abbycado]

Yeah, sexualizing a virtual girl is not normal in my opinion.

[Alex-Snow]

That sounds immature and he needs to grow up. How old is he? Are you sexually involved with him? If so how is that going? Message me if u want to chat about it it sounds like we may be close in age,

[Asker]

He's 21 and yeah we are involved long distance with sexual stuff. Feels hard to be close with him sometimes because of that so if he does something like that again then im out honestly, can't take that stress.

[Alex-Snow]

I think you can do better than him

[AI Opinion]

Ah, the classic video game character conundrum! 😉 Sometimes guys comment on characters as a playful or humorous way to express attraction without any real substance behind it. If he's reassured you that he's emotionally invested in you and his attraction to others, even pixelated ones, isn't serious, it might be light-hearted banter.

Keep communication open and trust your instincts. If it genuinely bothers you, let him know. Relationships thrive on honesty and understanding, and a little gaming flirtation shouldn't rock the boat too much! 🎮✨

[Anonymous]

Dress up as this charcter an see what he does to your ass. Thats half of what cosplaying is about.

[DryGermanGuy]

I’d say he has some growing up to do. 🙄

[Twalli]

They're not real, that's not an issue.

[In_Trance]

Ridiculous