Search Results: focus on one girl

Saw this in a [pretty stupid] conversation between two male friends. They're in their 30s but act like they're in their 20s. One was about to text the girl he has been seeing, ask her out again. His friend stopped him to give him advice on what to say, not say. It inspired this question.

The scenario is between a guy and a girl (but you can do same sex couple if you want. But this is about gender roles and preferences.) They are not strangers. They know each other, but not that well. They have just started casually dating. They both like each other.

But... the guy is reluctant [will not] commit. He's anticipating her wanting this. He's trying to play it cool. But he wants to keep dating her, having sex with her, have her in his life. "She's cool, and she's chill, and she's level-headed. But I don't want to fast-track anything." So his friend says to him, "Just tell her, 'Look, maybe I'll get there one day, but I don't want to hold you back from living your life.'" Typical commitmentphobe player b. s. But anyway, thought I'd make a question out of it.

What I'm getting at here is if there's a majority preference toward: politeness, or assertiveness, or something else. And do guys and girls have a different, or the same, idea about this. And, girls, does the assertiveness turn you on/do you like it, or does it turn you off?

It'd be for some snacks/appetizers as well, not just drinks, but for simplicity sake I didn't write that in each multiple choice because it would be too many words. This isn't a formal or fancy dinner date, but there will be food, so don't focus on that. And for those who don't drink alcohol, you can sub in any other beverage. It's not important. But it is a date, and there is sexual tension between them.

I met this guy online a few years ago from a dating website. He is from England and I’m from USA, and we dated online at first for a little while. As time went on, he stated his mental health problems and how he couldn’t be in a long distance relationship anymore. I didn’t hold him back so he left, but we had been texting on and off throughout the years. He wishes me a happy birthday and holiday, stuff like that.

within the last few months, we reconnected a lot more like more phone calls to texting. He even admitted to realizing that I might be the girl for him since throughout all these years, no woman near him had made him feel the same as I made him feel. He even had a plan where if we meet up within the next 2 years then we can get married considering how much we both went through. I was flattered but concerned since I didn’t want to get hurt again if he wasn’t ready mentally, so I asked if he was sure. He said he wasn’t and then stopped talking to me for a couple of months for a mental break only to reappear as if nothing happened.

I asked him if he still wanted to do that 2 year plan and he said sure, we text somewhat often still now. But, he told me recently that he joined a dating app just because of boredom and was laughing at how women messaged him for sex. I was confused since based off what he confessed, i should be the only one he needs to be focused on. I’m just nervous now that he’s going to try to date other women before we actually meet up and then have his feelings confused on who he likes more, or just trying to have random encounters in the meantime. I mean I can’t control him but we do have a plan to meet up by the end of this year or next year so I don’t understand why would he do this. Please share your thoughts below, thanks.