Search Results: in experienced guy

Hello all 😊

I know this question probably seems odd, but I don’t have a lot of experience with men and I’m quite crap at reading signals. I also have no confidence because my first crush humiliated me. I’ve been seeing this guy at work and he caught my eye. He doesn’t work in my department. The interactions started with him smiling at me with prolonged eye contact (I have never really seen him talking to girls outside of his department except for one who works in the canteen)

It was always him who smiled first and it was me who looked away first

I eventually said hi to him and we have little conversations now and then

After I first said hi to him, he went though a phase of ignoring me and looking away from me when we were in the same area

When we talk, he stands quite close to me and his pupils are very dilated

When we are talking, his eyes are fixated on mine and he will glance at my lips quickly before going back to my eyes

He seems somewhat fidgety when we talk
Yesterday, he smiled and we said hi, and then when I started chatting to him properly, he smiled even more

I was walking to the canteen and my (prettier) friend was walking in front. He was walking towards us but he was fixated on me and didn’t even look at her

My friends say they have seen the way he looks at me, and to quote, “they would be upset if their boyfriend looked at another girl the same way”
I’ve noticed that when we are in the same vicinity, he will tidy his hair and check it in his phone camera

Sometimes we won’t have any interaction, just a few glances and that’s it

It’s just baby steps at the moment, but do you think he may find me attractive?

It might involve sexual things or it might not and I’d be clear about my intentions from the beginning. Not that long ago he said something that implied he’d date me if he could. That combined with a long flirtatious and semi-romantic history between us and the way I’ve seen him look at me and act with me makes me believe there’s a good chance he’d be with me.

REASONS I FEEL IT MIGHT BE A GOOD IDEA:

• My mom and I saw a movie in which a woman decided to be with a guy despite knowing he’s going to die. My mom said it’s not about how long the connection lasts, it’s about how deep it is. That made me feel like maybe it’s worth experiencing a relationship with my friend even though my ultimate goal is to find someone else.

• A part of me feels like life is short, and I should live in the moment as long it’s not something unsafe.

• I’m afraid that if I don’t take my chance while I have it, I’ll never know for the rest of my life how it feels to truly be with him romantically.

• I want him so badly it sometimes drives me crazy.

• A part of me feels like the reasons for not being with him don’t really matter when I want him so badly.

REASONS I FEEL IT MIGHT BE A BAD IDEA:

• I’ve never had a first kiss or date before and a part of me wants to save those things for a guy I feel more romantic about.

• I’m afraid I won’t be able to not compare the way my future fiancé touches me with the way my friend would touch me.

• A part of me hopes to lose my virginity to someone I’m more deeply in love with.

• Since I’m uncertain about the situation, a part of me feels like a ‘better safe than sorry’ approach is best.