Search Results: look of attraction

I hate to say it but as man I usually have my mind made up within 30 seconds of meeting a woman of how physically attracted I am to her.

Emotional attraction does still weigh heavily into it though. She can be hot af but if I can’t stand her personality and/or she’s has no genuine interest in me I can move on. I can also move on a lot faster nowadays vs. when I was younger.

But the issue is often come across women I find that are 5’s or 6’s. They aren’t repugnant or anything but I don’t feel any butterfly’s in my stomach either. More often than not they really like me because while I am nice to them I also don’t bend over backwards for them either. I’m just as happy to be there or not be there. Either way is fine. So it’s easy to be myself.

But as a man I find that the ugly truth is I have never found myself growing in attraction for average looking women despite some of them having excellent personalities. I really have tried to “check myself” on this. Tell myself to look deeper. Tell myself to “grow up”. Feel guilty af about it.

But if tried to force myself to date and commit to average looking yet great personality girls in the past. It always ends in disaster. I quickly lose interest in sex and find myself having less patience about their problems. And I know that’s not fair at all.

Is it possible for a man to slowly fall in love with a woman he isn’t attracted to?

I am asking this because I have an opportunity to get married to an average looking girl who is outstanding in all other ways. She’s a very hard worker, respectful, excellent personality, moderate conservative, has no vices, etc. She’s also younger (27) yet mature and independent.

Yet she has a rather unattractive face and I feel Iike complete shit saying that. She’s was born with that those facial features and has zero control over them. I keep kicking myself not to judge that but it’s hard.

I’m 41 and I’m still in excellent shape. Reason being I exercise daily and I usually stick to a very healthy diet.

Anyway I became more self conscious about not showing my body off in pics or in public by my mid 30s. I don’t really feel comfortable going shirtless even at a beach/pool.

I do have one shirtless pic showing my abs off but it’s never something I will show a woman right away. I usually will show it once if she shows me a few suggestive pics (I don’t like nudes tbh but it’s nice to see what kind of body she has). Definitely not something I keep on social media though

Anyway I am well aware of the “creep” element guys my age have to watch out for. We got a lot less leeway vs guys in their early 20s on all of this.

But at the same time I’m wondering if I’m sometimes shortchanging myself by keeping an attractive asset I still have hidden. Is there a way to let a woman know about this without looking immature/creepy?

And yes I am well aware how women care about personality, drive, humor, money etc. Don’t need a lecture of on that. But this is one thing that can make me go from a 7 to an 8 on a pure physical attraction scale. But if done wrong it can look very bad.