Search Results: can i get her back

Ok me and this girl met when we were about 20 and had a great relationship for 8 years. I started drinking and it lead to us breaking up. She started dating a guy 2 weeks later I introduced her to. They lasted less than a year and we got back together exactly a year after separating.

I ended up finding pictures of her in sexy outfits and nudes on our old camera one day and some sexting stuff while going through our stuff in a closet I was cleaning out. I didn't tell her I found them. I spent the next 3 years trying to get her to send me dirty pictures. She broke up with me again and we separated for 3 years and then ended up back together again.

we've been back together over 10 years now and I have randomly tried a lot of times to get her to send me sexy stuff or sext with me, nothing has worked. This finally came to a head. I got tired of trying and getting nothing. We got into a pretty big argument about it and during the argument I find out that she thinks I'm talking about pictures she sent to another guy she dated right after we broke up the second time.

So both guys she dated right after we split she sent nudes and sexted with but whenever I have tried to get her to in the past I get excuses like she's worried about sending them because someone could get them for whatever reason which is all just excuses to me. So What, did you send them with pigeons the last 2 times.

Over the years this has gotten under my skin trying and never getting anything back. I usually have tried when I've been out of town for work or something. When I've tried sexting with her the responses have been either nothing at all or something that was just lame or her saying she didn't know what to say.

She says that she's been more sexually adventurous with me than anyone else ever. Our sex life I used to think was good but now I'm second guessing it. I usually make sure she gets off first and then she's in a hurry to get it over with. why is there no desire or lust there for her?

A decline in mutual respect, freedom, and trust in modern relationships — especially among Millennials and Gen Z — is causing love to fail and servitude to rise in its place.

I think mutual respect, freedom, and trust are clearly declining in modern relationships, especially among Millennials and Gen Z, and the data backs it up.
• Respect: Emotional labor is heavily imbalanced. Studies note that women often carry the “mankeeping” burden (managing the relationship’s emotional/social side), while only 12% of men over 30 say they feel fully valued by their partner (The Week, 8 at the Table). Both sides feel disrespected—men for their sacrifices, women for their roles.
• Trust: Gen Z is drifting into “situationships”—36% say they’re unsure how to even define their relationship (American Survey Center). Add in politics, which has become a dating deal-breaker (Newsweek), and it’s no surprise trust between men and women is eroding.

• Freedom: Gender role expectations still dominate. Research across 29 countries shows when men lose jobs in “male breadwinner” cultures, the risk of separation skyrockets—not because of money, but because freedom from rigid roles doesn’t really exist (PMC study). Men feel trapped in provision/protection, while women feel pressured to “do it all.” Both blame the other for limiting their freedom.
• Relationships overall: Gen Z is disengaging—described as a “relationship recession” by researchers. Many are opting out of dating or even intimacy altogether (UCL, The Guardian). Pew found 63% of men under 30 are single, compared with 34% of women (Vox). That gap itself shows massive distrust and disconnect.

So when respect, trust, and freedom are all crumbling, what’s left? Love can’t survive under those conditions. What you get instead is obligation and servitude, one partner bending to the other’s demands just to keep the relationship going.