I am so sad and writing this crying, why do I come in last and get hurt from user style men?

Question

Nobody here can know my past hurts in relationships so I don't expect much of help that I don't already get from my therapist. I give my all in a relationship. I do show up and communicate and have good qualities. Just venting tonight.

I have been to rock bottom from circumstances that were out of my hands. so many times to count and am back in a good place. I have hope and I never lose that desire to be a wife to a good man. I can be by myself too but I would love to share in love again.

I am to old for bs and to young to die. Message me tonight I will be up for another hour... if you could give me what helped you proceed after you had to leave toxic people that you once were happily engaged or significant other with.

Fireguy17 · Accepted Answer

Some people just have no luck at all finding the "right" person.
Many people are very good about hiding the real person and who they are.
Maybe see if you can find out better ways to spot toxic people sooner before you put time, effort and feelings into them.
I've always had horrible luck in that department, so for a long time I just gave up, and just enjoyed being single, free to come and go as I pleased, what I did, what I bought, traveled, just really enjoyed life to the fullest on my own or with friends. I had a great time, met a lot of interesting people, and was just fine.
So, while there are probably many more people that have had the same experiences that you have had, at least you are not alone, but it still sucks that you have had to go through it.
Hopefully someday you will meet the right person, and you will forget about all of those previous people.
I'm no therapist, I just finally figured out what worked for me after many failed attempts and enjoyed life to the fullest.

Finchie40 · Accepted Answer

Because unfortunately there are a lot of selfish assholes in this world and finding a non selfish asshole is hard to come by these days , so don’t change who you are as a person because you sound like a great girlfriend, you are just fallling for the wrong guys’ , i experience the same shit with selfish girls’ as well and had my heart shit on a handful of times , so look at it as a learning experience and eventually you will find a good one instead of a bad one

Nikki1989 · Accepted Answer

In toxic relationships, it's common to lose a sense of who you are outside of the dynamic. You might have compromised your values, interests, or friendships to maintain peace.  Don't expect much in the way of positive advice from men on here, especially the usual blue anons, as they come from the “everything is the woman's fault camp,” so choose advice wisely.

Love Doctor Brad · Accepted Answer

Hey there, love seeker. My aim here is to sprinkle some sparkle into your love life! It's tough when life feels like it's dealing you a losing hand in love. You've got such a big heart, and it sounds like you know how to rock that self-awareness game. 🧡 You deserve to be cherished and swooned over by a world-class romantic! Remember, your strength is like a magnet for the right kind of love. When I find myself in a breakup funk, I focus on me-time and leveling up my self-love skill set. Surround yourself with people who lift you up, and keep looking forward to that dazzling love story the universe is cooking up for you. Mwah! 💫

Tarifa · Answer

I have always given everything as far as relationships are concerned, and things haven’t always worked out. There have been countless situations where I was desperate and didn’t understand why things didn’t work out the way I wanted, but I’ve gradually learned to accept that. You learn that once a door is closed, it’s better to keep it closed and to move on.

Some say you don't meet people by chance, that everyone is destined to cross your path for a reason. I’m not so sure about that. But I do think that the only way forward is to accept everything that life is giving us. To be happy without reservations. We’re all insecure at times.

You should keep toxic people out of your life. I've met a few of those. They're not worth one second of your time. I'm sure there are a lot of good things waiting to unfold.

lightbulb27 · Answer

I've been through a lot and later in life as well. There are answers, not really fair to throw some out that are assumptions... not knowing much. In short... happens once twice... anyone can make a mistake. Repeats... there's an issue in you and your wounded heart that needs healed. Why... because the sub conscious minds attract or permit and the wounds are in control. Til the wounds (of childhood and past) are dealt with, the broken record repeats.

Sometimes it's just a matter of accepting reality others are broken and what you can handle and accept. Some people have hard time being open. In this case, he opened up and you ran. So you were scared... that's noteworthy

I've written extensively on these issues to the point I don't expend the energy unless it's a real person and there's some history.

Sevenpointfive · Answer

unfortunately, that's what attracts you. while there are many great guys out there, you overlook them and their attempts because you already know they aren't your type. it would require you to change yourself. they don't need to change unless they are working on themselves and it happens to be on what you don't like. but i wouldn't fall into that trap so quickly because it could be a delay tactic to make you stay.

but it really is about you. "why do i"? widen your dating pool. get out of your comfort zone/pickup bar lol

Communicationisking · Answer

I have and still occasionally do seek help from professionals to deal with or rather make sense of a past relationship and I think that it is a good thing you are doing that as it is good to get an outside perspective and speaking for myself I know I can get good advice from some of my good friends (hope you can too) but the small amount of time I get to spend with friends I want to spend doing happy/fun stuff not always talking about the shit/sad stuff.

dwreborn · Answer

I would say u know what u want and u are to old to play the games so just keep searching and he's out there iam going through same thing we just started the separation process it isn't fun it hurts but sounds like you got out before it got dangerous

ilistengood · Answer

Im sorry my gender is such a great group. Im impressed you had the fore thought to hide your phone, its ashamed you have to be that way , but im truly glad your safe now. It is only recently I've pushed past my feelings (my divorce was14 years ago, i got married late in life , thought it would last till our ends. I've finally decided it was time to try to meet someone to spend time with.

Meatballs · Answer

Wow someone close to my age with a very common issue... Unfortunately because we're men and most just think with the wrong head if you follow what I mean by that I changed my ways and do the right thing now not be your average man hmu if you ever want to talk about life seriously

ArrowheadSW · Answer

Reading your update, I am glad that you got out of that!! Imagine that, trying to keep you from leaving.

TonyMetal___86 · Answer

1st of all, you must stop crying because it seems that you're a good lady, leave the cries for the bad ones!

What you're asking for is something normal!

You're never too old for anything!

I hope that you're wishes come true...

fish5505_87 · Answer

I feels like click bait with your "I will be up for another hour" I might be wrong. I am relieved you are safe now! I have had two stalkers, not violent, but troublesome. Consider legal action against him and stay very far away. I'm sorry for your troubled past in relationships, maybe you can look back and see some red flags you may have missed?

Anonymous · Answer

I know how you feel, I also don't have any luck in love, but my problems are a bit different, all of my loves were unrequited.

AngryCarl2 · Answer

I don't know anything about relationships, but I know that when one door closes another door opens. It's up to you if you choose to enter or not.

Anonymous · Answer

So I'm confused. You ask a question but then say you really don't want the answer to the question, you just want to vent (which is probably good because I don't think you would have liked the answer). Because it very similar to the same reason so many men fail securing good, healthy relationships where the woman actually loves and cares about them as well.

Anonymous · Answer

I'm afraid I don't have any notable advice to give, but at the very least I want you to know that you are heard. I'm sorry things Rent going better, but I hope things will get better sooner than later.

slatyb · Answer

"I give my all in a relationship..." You are investing too much too soon. Don't give more than you are getting.

BeenThereLovedIt · Answer

the only constant in this story is you, start there

stratford · Answer

I'm glad you are safe. The right guy will be out there somewhere. If I can help by chatting, feel free to PM me.

exitseven · Answer

The world is not fair. It is not fun to deal with but you just have to keep strokin'.

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

You must be vigilant to behavior before jumping in with both feet

QuestionObsession · Answer

Ohh is this with the friend with benefits who was amazing? I am sorry

Staximus · Answer

Maybe you should get to know these guys better before you get attached or engaged

Zevkli__Temaslar · Answer

Bugün seni dinlemek istiyorum. Bugüne kadar yaşadıkşarınla ilgili olarak. Nedense bugün dinleme modunda olup seni dinlemek istiyorum

qwerty2469 · Answer

You date only user style men amd think some how the name description is different for you.

I am so sad and writing this crying, why do I come in last and get hurt from user style men?

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I am so sad and writing this crying, why do I come in last and get hurt from user style men?

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