Search Results: he was the one who cheated on me

Asymmetric romantic attraction is one person has feelings and the other does not. The person who has feelings isn’t thinking clearly because chemicals are (naturally) being released in their brains compromising their judgment. But the other person can see everything as plain as day because they aren’t attracted to them hence little/no brain chemicals.

So person who has no feelings has to make a decision on how to handle a person they have influence over. The moral thing to do is be tactfully honest with the other person (and do it early). But we don’t live in a moral world so the following usually happens:

Scenario #1: Man manipulates the woman into sex when she is thinking there is going to be a relationship. Worst case scenario he gets her pregnant and abandones her.

Scenario #2: Woman manipulated the man into thinking she likes him when she doesn’t. She does this for attention, favors, free meals, free counseling, etc (stereotypical friéndzone).

Worst case scenario is she is a gold digger. Yeah she has to give him up to him at the point but she gets a huge payout for faking it. She will likely divorce him and screw him over in alimony (and she likely cheated during the marriage). She never had feelings for at all. Just a good actress.

Now roles can be reversed at times. Some women do use men only for sex and some men do seek out “suger mamas”. Some men do friéndzone women for their own ends. However for is just not as common. However I will say it is at least biologically natural to want to have sex with someone even if you don’t want a relationship. However using a person for money, ego, attention, favors, etc is downright conceited.

Anyway I got in a long “debate” with a feminist on here who believed that men should be held liable if they mislead a woman into sex. But she had no problem with women taking advantage of men via the friéndzone or worse (gold diggers). Not kidding.

I argue that BOTH genders need to watch out for themselves.

If you had an affair just one time and you even spoke with the person with whom you had an affair and agreed it was a major mistake, would you still tell your significant other the truth? Or would you just let it slide one time and learn your lesson that way?

I did not find an older discussion on this when I searched.

As an Irish Catholic priest and writer on the Catholic Church, it's a shame this is written about him:

"When one spurned woman showed up at Martin's brother in Dublin and asked where Malachi was, she was told:

"Dear girl. I don't know. I must tell you, you are the fourth woman who has come here asking me the same question about Malachi. All of them have essentially the same story to tell. That they were in love with Malachi and thought Malachi was in love with them."

"Four women?" she demanded. "The same story?"

He nodded, and said, "And one rather attractive young man.""