Search Results: am i getting too old

I was working out the other day and I saw a young female (20ish?) really struggling to move a piece of exercise equipment. She was very attractive and I reflexively was going to go help. I stopped myself because I was afraid she was either going to think I was hitting on her or just be offended because of some feminist bullshit thinking. I just said fuck it, it's not my problem and I'm not getting any hate for trying to be nice. Opinions?

When I say “dangerous” I don’t mean a guy making some asshole remark like “fuck you cunt” or something else when a woman (politely) turns him down. Him showing some frustrated anger is NOT getting “dangerous”. It might not be appropriate and even creepy. But there is a fine line between him being sour grapes vs. being a legitimate threat.

I’m talking about a guy seriously getting physically violent, legitimately threatening violence or aggressively stalking afterwards. I’m talking in person stalking too (not stalking on social media). Like showing up at the woman’s house or at her work.

I do believe men like this exist. I make zero excuses for them and it’s twisted/wrong. But I also believe they are very rare (less than 1 out of a 1000 men). Instead women get paranoid because of ANECDOTAL evidence. They read a story online or hear of friend of a friend having a legitimately scary incident. Then they get this bogey man complex about men in general.

I say this because I think this paranoia has made women progressively worse in the last few years at tactfully rejecting men. They rather play games, ghost and of course friend zone and rationalize it to themselves out of a misplaced paranoia. When in reality all they have to say is “hey thanks for approaching me but I have to be honest I’m not interested”’. While no guy likes hearing that the reality is 99% of men out there will accept that and move on.

But why is it so hard for women to be (politely) honest? I think the so called rise of the “incel” community is partially attributed to men being frustrated about not getting direct communication from women. The game playing does more psychological damage then they realize.

Most men can take rejection especially in our mid 20s or older. We are used to sticking our necks out and taking the risk. It unfortunately comes with the territory but it is how it is.

I’ve been dating my girlfriend Lucy for a year. Lucy has a lot of good values. She’s smart with her money and has no debt. We’re thinking about getting married in the new year. I’m 33 and she’s 43, so there’s no time waste. But 90% of her friends are male, so only has 3 female friends. Which is kind of strange to me. She’s not a tomboy, these dudes aren’t gay, so why would she be so close to other men? She has a guy friend Alex that she texts a lot. Every time Alex has a girlfriend she doesn’t like his relationship with Lucy. Also, Alex doesn’t text Lucy as often when he’s dating, and Lucy gets pissed that he’s neglected. I wrote about this in another question.

We’ve had arguments about her male friends and she told me that I’m “too jealous”, and that she’ll stop hanging around men for our relationship. She showed me her texts to prove there’s nothing going on with the guys, but I’m still uncomfortable.

On the flip side she hates that my best friend is a 69 year old woman whom I FaceTime once awhile. So how can I accept her guy friends and she doesn’t like me being friends with an elderly woman? She also got mad at me for going a girls apartment with a crowd.