Why do other peoples love life bother some people (my age gap relationship)?


I just find it quite odd that you would let something as personal and completely unrelated to your own life, bother you. Obviously in this take I will be talking about the great age gap debate because that is what I relate with. But the same can go for homosexuality in relationships too.

The same people who say "don't judge" and "love is love" also say "that's disgusting" and "this should be illegal". The hypocrisy.

Comments like "What could they possibly have in common" or "how could she find him attractive" really make no sense to me. You aren't present in our daily life together or for our 4 hour long conversations so why would you assume anything about or relationship? Just because you wouldn't do it or it seems "foreign" to you doesn't mean everyone else will think like you.

Why do other peoples love life bother some people (my age gap relationship)?

Differences is what makes the world go round. Imagine if everybody had the same preferences as you. Kind of depressing right? We should celebrate the differences as long as they aren't hurting anyone.

Two adults of legal age, with a large age gap in love? This affects you how? It doesn't. You immediately think "Oh he must be manipulating her" "Oh she must be using him for his money" and it's quite honestly just rude and ignorant. How many age gap relationships have you been in or observed up close and personal to know these "facts"?

Why do other peoples love life bother some people (my age gap relationship)?

Chances are, if you're so disgusted by an age gap, you've never been in a relationship with one so how would you know?

If you wouldn't do it, that's great. But stop putting other people down for their choices. At 18 you can fight and die for your country and everybody loves it but you can't be in an age gap relationship without everyone losing their shit? Honestly weird.

You don't know what life experiences have led me to have the personality to be attracted to an older man. You don't know me. You see the outside of a complex puzzle. Who knows why the puzzle was even made, but the pieces fit together. And it's none of your business.

He makes me happy, I make him happy. I've been manipulated before by someone close to me, who should have protected me. I know what manipulation looks like. I'm young and I have been naive about many things, granted. But I know manipulation. I have never once felt used, abused and manipulated by my partner. Me and him have worked out a system, we've got each others backs.

Why do other peoples love life bother some people (my age gap relationship)?

I'm not going to justify my relationship but to answer a big question many people have asked me "What could you possibly have in common?" Here is my answer, unique to me and my boyfriends experience together:

Yes, I am using the "old soul" defense. I have always had an old soul. Growing up sheltered from social media and many modern entertainment media, I relied on "older" things to entertain me. Books, movies from the 1930s to the 1980s, music from 1950s to the 1980s. It just became a part of my identity.

Why do other peoples love life bother some people (my age gap relationship)?

As I grew up and socialized with people my age, they were clueless to most all my references to things from a "forgotten" time. It was depressing. The only time I had fun socializing was when it was with adults. And while he is mature in that sense, despite his age he is energetic, funny, and the sweetest man I've ever met.

I drew this by the way, kind of proud of myself
I drew this by the way, kind of proud of myself

I could keep going but this my take is getting rather long. Maybe I'll do another pertaining to this subject another day. If you read this whole thing, thank you for using your time on my take.



Why do other peoples love life bother some people (my age gap relationship)?
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Most Helpful Guys

  • alance99
    As long as both individuala are happy in relationship they shouldn't care about others opinions at all coz people will always be jealous be it your good times or bad times, keep going strong forever in life.

    Best wishes to both of you 😊
    Like 1 Person
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  • rebeliouse
    what is the age gap?
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Most Helpful Girl

  • Gwenhwyfar
    I agree with u
    Like 2 People
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What Girls & Guys Said

  • Celtero
    32 years? You're 18? Lol.

    Well, people still indulge in this little fantasy that true love exists when the reality is we choose most of our partners with our lizard brain and our standards aren't that strict, we just want company and sex. This guy and you probably have nothing in common, and when he's socially interacting with you I guarantee he feels like he's babysitting. You're doing the classic move of "I am so mature and smart for my age for fucking an older guy," like... nope. Dude just babysits you so he can have access to your body. And hey, I don't really mind that arrangement if everyone is happier, but don't pretend it is what it isn't. Nobody well-adjusted older person still finds teenagers enjoyable to be around. If you were a boy would you two still hang out? Does he have other teenager friends, hmm?

    Then there's the obvious question if he groomed you or not... You apparently don't have a dad because a dad would've beaten this guy's ass into the ground. So uh... daddy issues in play? Did your relationship start when you were a minor? How would you feel if your daughter brought home a man who was older than her dad? Should we just be cool adults having relationships with teens now? No, because obviously these types of relationships typically have negative outcomes...

    So that brings me to my last point... how will this affect your outcome? Well, obviously it'll be hard if you want kids, since his virility is questionable and he likely only has 20-40 years left on this earth and you have 30 more than him. So your kids won't get to spend many years with their father in their adulthood, and you'll have to explain to any future partner how your previous relationship was with a man almost 3x your age. And what if he turns out to be bad earlier? Maybe he dumps you for some 15 year old? Maybe he turns out to be abusive, or maybe you just mature and figure out that he's not that great of a person and you have better options... You'll have to explain this to future potential partners and there is a good chance they'll be disturbed by it and it could cause you other issues in your relationships.

    And like I said... I don't really give a shit, perhaps one day I'll be a 50 year old banging 18- year-olds... but there are definitely some considerations for you to make... there's some nuance to the issue so don't just pretend you can slogan "love is love" and nothing bad will happen.
    Disagree 1 Person
  • ChrisMaster69
    Just noticed this mytake as it popped up on the live feed.

    good write up and very accurate it does not concern anyone.

    People will always judge what’s different, that upsets their own personal views.

    The big thing is, are they happy, both treat each other with respect and are aware of the hear and now but also the future.

    After that, it’s simply enjoy life.

    these other people do not live someone else’s life.
    Like 1 Person
  • Craftsman
    Seems to me that you and your significant other are doing what is right for you. The rest of the world can go take a hike, or whatever it is that gets their nose out of where it really does not belong.
    As long as you are not hurting each other, and you are not damaging anyone else with your relationship, it is none of anyone else's business what your relationship is and with whom that relationship is.
    Like 1 Person
  • average-j0e
    sometimes its more of a I've been there. not saying it doesn't work, but you better know what you're doing else thats gonna leave a mark
  • RichSD
    People get mad when they see anyone else taking potential mates away from them.
    Funny 1 Person
  • najekim
    A good relationship is based on whatever works for the couple.
    Like 1 Person
  • Grond21
    I support you
    Like 1 Person
  • wankiam
    yuuup... no one elses business