Do you have empathy for some incels?

[Anonymous]

I'm of course not talking about the ones that advocate murder or rape of women. I'm talking about the onea that are depressed and suffering from mental health issues like body dismorphia and thinking they're inferior or trash. The ones that don't have any success in the dating world & feel like no women would or could ever love them. Do you not have empathy for those kind of incels? Because they're not all the same

[Lionman95]

Yes I do, because I´ve been on myself for some time or felt understood by them.
I think most of those guys lack a healthy of themselves and of relationships.
They see the good sides of relationships guys&girls having a good time. They see all those heart warming Tiktoks or clips on Youtube and feel like they are left out.
I get that but a relationship is more than that it is more good sides, it can be messy at times and tthere is responsibility connected to it.
I think they need to learn to cherish being single and being happy with who they are before they are able for a relationship. That´s at least what helped me.

[kyleelyn199723]

I have body dysmorphia so yes I do have empathy. Body dysmorphia is one sick thing. It is the worst. You never know how you look , even if you do look good you think you look bad. When I gained weight at one point, I couldn’t even tell and thought I was getting skinnier. It’s something where if you don’t have it, you don’t understand it and yes that can affect relationships in terms of romantic ones because you don’t exude enough confidence and drag your insecurities into relationships, which is not necessarily your fault. Yes I think you need to learn what behaviors are unreasonable when you have insecurities. Would I date someone just because I feel bad for them? No I wouldn’t

[Asker]

No where did i mention anything about dating then out of pity

[Asker]

Them*

[kyleelyn199723]

Never said you asked.

[Bluemax]

Would you mind if I ask you a few questions about body dysmorphic disorder?

[kyleelyn199723]

@Bluemax ask away

[Bluemax]

Well, let's begin by asking if that's you in your picture

[MzAsh]

I feel for them, but it’s important that they know it’s their responsibility to self improve where they can. No one is entitled to a lover.

[Asker]

I think the no one is entitled card has been established. They're aware. I think they need to know that they're improving for themselves and not other people

[MzAsh]

Some aren’t aware enough. They still try to fight me on how women should lower their standards. No women need to raise their standards if anything. I agree with your last statement.

[Asker]

The funny thing is the higher thr value of man a women chases, the more options that man has. There's a lot of average guys that aren't given the time of the day because a lot of women want to get as close to the sun as possible without getting burn. And yeah if they feel like they're doing it for other people, they won't stick tbrough with it

[MzAsh]

Women who chase any man eventually do get burned. That’s why I don’t encourage women to chase at all. If an average guy is good looking enough for her, has his shit together, and is loyal, polite, and agreeable, that’s where a woman wins for the long haul.

[Asker]

But average isn't good enough for a lot of women

[Bluemax]

I was going to write a reply, but you said everything I would have.

[ChrisMaster69]

I do to a point, where it is real and diagnosed and under therapy.

also where it is not used as an excuse.

I have worked with lads and have friends with missing body parts and some pretty brutal scaring, they still manage to interact with girls.

the rest are just losers

[hellionthesagereborn]

Of course. Some one who is socially awkward is going to get screwed over simply because he doesn't understand how to play the game (and it is a game), or will get screwed over because he is empathetic and is concerned about making others comfortable that he will look like he is unconfident which will screw him out of a relationship. I don't think they deserve to be single forever because of that.

[thotmas97]

I don’t know if they’re avoiding social situations out of empathy

[hellionthesagereborn]

@thotmas97 No, I said socially awkward as in they don't know how to properly socialize. If you are not socialized properly when young it becomes increasingly more difficult as you get older. Empathy was a reference to them being overly concerned about making a girl uncomfortable which will make him less likely to make a move just like being unconfident does.

[thotmas97]

That’s not generally what incels are concerned with. Try to find an incel that hasn’t tried to solicit a girl or harassed them at some point, it’s a very common occurrence among them at most girls will attest to.

[thotmas97]

The only real distinction is that they almost exclusively function online.

[Asker]

@thotmas97 Yeah but again can't label them all the same. There are the ones that don't do that so it's not fair to cram them in the homicidal ones

[Asker]

With*

[hellionthesagereborn]

@thotmas97 Inaccurate. Guys who can't get laid are not all alike, they are not all pieces of shit. That is a misrepresentation and the asker even openly stated he wasn't refering to those types.

[MCheetah]

Mostly. The ones I have sympathy for aren't true incels, though. They're just guys who can't catch a break. I know the feeling. There is a difference between Forever Alones, pre-Incels (Redpillers), and true Incels, though. I believe most incels could be cured with some mandatory military training and $300 for an escort, though. At least the ones who haven't gone full Eliott Roger, yet. I have great sympathy for the Forever Alones you're describing.

[DarcRefractions]

No they lazy entitled men.
Offend super fat or skinny.
Bad hygiene
Don't go the gym. Never seen a Fit incel.

And they moms or grandma or aunts enabling them. by letting them live them.


How you not have the motivation to go get pussy and better yourself.

They want to. be spoon fed

[Anonymous]

My empathy is stunted at best, so no. But I don’t wish ill on those who have just a hard time getting laid. It’s only the wretched in the incel community that I have an issue with.

[Asker]

Let's shit on guys with some serious mental health issues. I mean what could go wrong right

[Opinion Owner]

Let’s threaten half the population because we can’t handle our own personal problems, and piss off 80% of the world in the process. What could go wrong?

[Asker]

Empathy works a lot better than derision. You convince someone they're a bad guy long enough, they'll start to believe it. Not all incels are the same. Just like not all women are the same, we can apply that here too

[Opinion Owner]

True. But when most of the incel community shits on women, hates us, hurts us and celebrates those that hurt or kill us, why the fuck would we bother with empathy? They want good treatment and empathy? They need to get rid of their extremists and show us they aren’t a threat

[Asker]

Because not all of them act like that? There was a forum called incels without hate and they don't shit on or hate women. Instead they talked about ways to cope with things ans their mental health. But or course the media says fear all incels, they're all out to get you ahhhh run! And because of that, the other side which is the light side of incels are painting as killers and rapist

[Asker]

Painted*

[Opinion Owner]

Most of the incels do hate women, dude. They’re notorious for it. Do all of them? No, but they are the minority here. Online and offline, I’ve talked to two incels total who weren’t pieces of shit, out of dozens.

[Asker]

So because they're in the minority, we should still shit on them? That makes a lot of sense

[Opinion Owner]

As opposed to acting as if they’re the norm and ignoring the problem? Get rid of your extremists and then we’ll talk about anything ethical.

[Asker]

You lump them in all the same category? Because that's the problem right there

[Opinion Owner]

No, the problem lies with those extremists. They are the reason we react this way. So until you fix that problem, we have no choice but to do what we must to protect ourselves from that group, even those who are in that good minority.

[Asker]

That's not fair to the ones that don't act like that. Remeber you make someone look like a villain long enough, they'll start to think they are. Sorry im not going be politically corrrect and say all incels are bad because not all of them are

[Opinion Owner]

It’s not fair for us to have to be concerned with the bulk of their “movement” whilst the good ones do nothing to help, and complain when we are concerned about said group.

[Juxtapose]

Not really, no. You don't need a girlfriend.. they're nice (I have one) but you don't *NEED* one.

Suck it up & toughen up guys.

[Asker]

Im rich and have a lot of money. But you poor people don't need it and can still be happy

[Juxtapose]

You can too, given enough time.

[Bluemax]

My wife wasn't merely "nice" to have around. She was an integral part of my life. She added joy and meaning to it. We are a social and sexual species. It is a biological drive that is rooted in us over half a billion years of evolution. There are real negative consequences when the drive isn't met. We see this not just in us, but other primates as well.

[Juxtapose]

@Bluemax Well quite a few men these days are gonna die alone, they gotta deal with it.

You can't allow yourself to depend on someone who could leave you on a whim.

At least your lady is true and testedm

[Bluemax]

I agree quite a few of them will die alone. But simply telling them that having a companion is merely "nice" isn't going to help. Unlike you, I don't pretend to have a solution.

Humans are hardwired for sex and love. Granted there are some outliers who seem not to be, but they are the exceptions.

[Anonymous]

Yes. Even the ones that say nasty things about women are suffering as well.
To say that how they talk about women determines whether we should care about them is to justify the gynocentric attitudes in society they complain about.

[TheFlak38]

Of course I do. I always try to tell them it's not bad that they don't have a woman. It can be a good thing.

[OddBeMe]

The problem is, the ones that don’t advocate “rape” are still apart of the group and silence endorses it.

[Anonymous]

This makes me mad because it reminds me that I like to feel that men are expected to take or accept responsibility for their situation or dating lives more than women are

[Anonymous]

I have more sympathy for them than feminists or man hating shrews. I would donate money to them if I could

[thotmas97]

Sure. That only extends so far though

[Anonymous]

Yeah but I'm 6'3ft athletic successful and hung.

[JesseJayNeak]

In a way