Are you a boring person? Are your conversations dry?

[Bellona]

I can’t help you if you agree. I just thought I could get people chatting on how we can overcome being boring and dry even. I also wanted to find some people to relate to.

My story:

I grew up around people who mainly shared their ideas and thoughts to me. I never and many times don’t get a chance to respond to what they have said - ranters 🙄. So, now that I am an adult and talk to more new people I find it hard to respond to the speaker because I have been conditioned by adults to listen and to speak when spoken to or with family to speak if there is no one speaking 😣.

I also struggle with asking people fun questions besides job/ lifestyle related. It’s hard wanting to know someone yet you find yourself nodding and smiling quietly because no one in your life asked you questions [theoretical] and because you’re not used to it and not used to having control of a convo. In turn, people see me as boring. when people ask me questions about where I would travel and why I say I don't know. Honestly, I don’t give much thought into what I am interested in. Am a just a psycho?

I have restricted myself to fully share my opinions. Ever since I started middle school I was faced with judgey kids. Back then if a kid wore pink they would say how they were weird. So, myself coming for elementary loving pink started wearing black and stopped sharing her thoughts in case they would be judged for being too girly, childish or weird.

Examples of my
conversations:

Them: “ I am studying to be a teacher”
Me: processing [ok, that is cool I loved school - they will share more now so listen after acknowledging their statement]
Response “oh, ok”
Them: says nothing*
Me: goes home and thinks about how I could have asked about their study life and their degree or what made them choose to be a teacher.

Help me: I am interested in humans but I find it hard to show it. Am I mentally challenged, a psycho, damaged or else? what can I say? I am good at being monotone, afraid of expression.

[Friendlybro79]

The fact that you were conditioned by ranters to not speak just needs you to recondition yourself now that you're an adult. While you're in your processing stage just spit it out. Your thought in your ex was a perfect response. You just have to say it out loud. You can do this. You're not mindless and incapable.

[Friendlybro79]

And if this is impossible for you please go to a therapist. You refer to us as humans. You are allowed to be one too. No one but you is stopping you now. Your past as a child is gone and done. You didn't have control then but you do now. Take the wheel and steer yourself and therapy is a valid option to help you if you need.

[Friendlybro79]

Wishing you well! Thanks for the mho. Rooting for you.

[convo_king89]

I can be boring, but my conversations can quickly and easily turn dirty.

[mandyfire98]

I can honestly say that I've never been described as boring, it's always been the opposite really

[Bklynbadboy12]

I don't think I'm boring but maybe one day we can chat and you can find our for yourself