Why do I always attract ONLY negative attention?

[Anonymous]

All my life people disliked me for no reason. Now that I have to take the bus everywhere and don't have a car it gives people more of an opportunity to make fun of me. Plus I dealt with a lot of bullying at jobs so I'm sure I get recognized everytime I go for a job interview. If I'm on the bus there's either an older woman looking at me and laughing and gossiping with her boyfriend or male partner or a group of teenagers laughing at me and being as ruthless as possible. If I walk into a building people stop and stare at me either follows after whispering and staring or just flat out staring. The other day a grown woman decided to stare at me and start gossiping and making gestures and because I got mad back and started mumbling under my breath she kept staring and making gestures and whispering. Then another time this grown woman decided to stare at me and start talking about me to her partner. I understand I lived in California for 8 years but whether people seen me in almost city in LA county, it's driving me crazy how many people are getting pleasure out of trying to provoke me to anger everyday and it doesn't help that I look too unique. I rather be Caucasian than a mixed black woman. Of course the darker my skin gets the meaner people are to me. It's not fair either because I have no friends and no boyfriend. I mean pigs probably will start flying before I ever if possible get a boyfriend. Anyways I'm deep in poverty so I can't afford to flat iron my hair to fit in or wear braids like all the other black girls. It's so frustrating and then since I don't dress showing a lot or like a lot of other girls I draw attention. I deal with men in cars mocking me or calling me ugly or honking all the time. The only time people SOMEWHAT RESPECT me is in church or at a job other than that strangers 9 times out of 10 treat me like the very scum on the earth. This world has gotten evil lately I'm sure especially since 2019.

[MittParekh15]

Hey Buddy,

Don't worry, just be yourself

Everybody is unique, and emrace who you are and try to excel in things and find a better job, where you are respected, this will automatically help you in new environment and fell confident

Don't b ashamed of taking a bus, even I do take bus and public transport as I don't know how to drive

Everything will be okay, don't just let negativity wound your self esteem, find a solution as you know yourself better

[Nerdvana]

I totally feel you. I am in the same situation. Which I don't understand, because I think I am the nicest guy, very approachable and friendly. Although I don't take public transportation, because I live in Los Angeles, and it would take 6 hours to get work. But other than that. I can understand you. And I don't think it's fair. People don't try to get to know me, before it's judges me. But like you said, it's the way the world is now.

[Anonymous]

This is your destiny