Kindness costs nothing. So why is it we live in a world where most find it difficult to be kind?

[thegreenyogi]

Updates

4 mo

The great thing about being human is that we're all different and we have a different perspective based upon our life experiences and circumstances and it's important to consider that opinions are given on that basis. There is so much that goes beyond the surface.

[Friendlybro79]

In my experience if you talk to someone who isn't kind they expect too much in return. If they do something nice and don't get something immediately in return of equal kindness, they think they've been wronged, or it isn't worth it to be beside.

I think part of it, not all, is selfishness. Every day I try to do small acts of kindness just because and some people have asked me what do I get out of it. That's how I've formed this opinion. I have replied with that many times nothing, sometimes a thank you, to which they ask me, "What's the point?"

To be kind just to be kind doesn't make sense to people. It's probably where capitalism came from lol. You don't do anything for charity because it's not enough to incentive people to keep moving forward. Too many people need incentives or the idea an incentive exists to do anything. Enough people don't feel it's worth it to help each other if it doesn't give them back something in return.

I'm not saying this to be political but actually philosophical about it.

[Zack-Bann]

Unfortunately kindness doesn’t cost nothing these days.
It’s a choice like any other and comes with consequences.
Be kind to the wrong person and you will be shamelessly exploited.


So people guard themselves by building walls and only letting in the select few they have chosen to accept inside


Kindness is a casualty of that

[Friendlybro79]

@Zack-Bann I can't take away your opinion, and don't want to if that's how you feel, but I kindly disagree.. Kindness can absolutely be free and is for me every day. I am not kind all the time because I'm human, so I'm not saying I'm a martyr, but if people try to exploit your kindness, don't let them. That is a powerful lesson for yourself and to teach others that try to get away with it.

I notice you didn't say that is stopping you from being kind so I want to say I acknowledge that.

I'm just referring to the exploitation piece of your reply if you're struggling with it. I just don't see it as a cost, because I don't buy it. It's like someone trying to sell me something and I say no thanks. Have a good one

[Zack-Bann]

You’re driving and see someone hurt on the side of the road
You pull over and someone else pops up and they steal your car and leave you stranded.

Now your kindness got you exploited.

It’s only one example out of many.

No one is saying chose not to be kind but we live in an evil world.
We can’t be oblivious to it and walk around with our heart on our sleeve

My grandfather was a good man. He chose kindness above all else.
People would knock on his door and ask to borrow money he didn’t have
So he would in turn borrow money to lend them. They would leave. And he would work off his debt

In his mind he did a good deed

But what he did was leave his kids and grand kids in dire straits when later in life he needed medical attention and we had no money to our name.
So my mom and uncles covered his medical bills from their own pockets and put themselves in a long term financial disadvantage that I ended up inheriting.

His kindness to the self serving strangers had doomed me to a life of constant battle with poverty

So you will excuse me if I don’t see acts of kindness as a net positive and chose who deserves my kindness and who doesn’t as a way of protecting myself and my future family

[Friendlybro79]

Sure I can understand that's why I said I wasn't trying to change your mind but just sharing my perspective and experience. You gotta live your life how you see fit. I wish you well

[LuciusTheOdd]

Kindness actually does cost something, All the time.


In WW1 It was either an American or British soldier who Spared the life of a German soldier out of kindness, and that German soldier turned out to be Hitler… fast forward and we have WW2.


You can give charity to people, For example, giving a homeless man $10 But then you’re down on $10, And how often Will they use that money on something Like alcohol or illegal substances?
At that point, all you did was give someone $10 to Drink beer, or commit some kind of crime.


Kindness can actually cost a lot, Some of the most coldhearted people out there were very loving and very kind originally, But they’re kindness got taken for granted, as they were used and abused by the very people they tried to help.


Kindness doesn’t cost nothing for some people. It can cost everything.

[CupcakeTheDestroyer]

In a highly individualized society that promotes care of the self before others and “pick yourself up by your bootstraps” kindness can often only occur when framed in a way that makes someone look better to others rather than for the sake of kindness itself.

[MontBlanc]

Kindness may cost nothing materially, but it requires awareness and emotional security.

Many people are moving through the world in survival mode guarded, distracted, or carrying wounds they haven’t resolved.

When someone feels threatened or depleted, kindness doesn’t come naturally.

It’s simple in principle, but it takes inner stability to practice consistently.

[NoDecision]

Simple! You have to be cruel to be kind.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/m1drZqMSiyAhttps://www.youtube.com/embed/WJkxVBE7Y88

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

... But kindness does cost something, in my eyes.

Because, as you said, life events made me look at it this way. So, given how things happened in my life, I don't walk around being kind, I prefer remaining neutral until I see signs that kindness will be mutual

[exitseven]

People seem to be a lot meaner today. My father used to say that nobody ever smiles in Harvard Square. This was 20 years ago. I took notice of this as well. I think that liberals just hate themselves so much that they have to make everyone else miserable.

[genericname85]

cause we live in a time of steep financial decline and people are stressed the fuck out cause they have to make ends meet. it's hard to be kind if you're under a huge ammount of stress and pressure. that's why it's rare even though it "costs nothing".

[msc545]

I think the reason for this is because many people, particularly men, conflate kindness and weakness, and they can't tell the difference between the two. I think it also goes to gender differences in the sense that women are not afraid of possibly appearing gentle. Men are extremely worried about it because they often think that it is also not different than homosexuality.

[NathanDavis]

because the powers that be... have drifted society towards profit

and capitalize on that...

people seek profit and gain and taking for themselves and so that... is what the makes the world go round...

[Theunfadeable]

I don’t believe that most people do find it difficult to kind. I see Real life examples of people showing kindness to others every single day. What makes you think most people find it difficult to show kindness to other people?

[CherryLove007]

Because nobody said life was going to be fair. I learned this very early on from my father. Most people are trying to keep their head above water.

[Chazmatazz269]

Hurt people hurt people. It’s a vicious cycle that requires meaningful effort to break out of. Many people are too lazy and selfish to maintain an altruistic lifestyle.

[AviatorTom]

Kindness sometimes does cost. Consider the good Samaritan who stops to help a stranded motorist and is struck by a truck. Kindness does happen, but not in all situations.

[Shy-boy53]

I think a lot of it is to do with how they have been brought or dragged up I guess. I was always taught that kindness costs nothing and can often be very rewarding. So have always practiced that

[Levin]

Some people are kind at the expense of themselves. In those cases, it can be helpful to be more boundaried.

[AgentG111]

Because at times it's been shown and proven that kindness kills. Not always but because humans are idiots they take advantage of people's kindness.

You can always be kind until someone takes advantage of you!

[Agape93]

Oh kindness can come at a cost with certain people or situations.

[abc3643]

No good deed goes unpunished.

I learned this the hard way in The School of Hard Knocks.

[Siggie2]

Because so many people are hurting each other, the victims are gonna hurt others too, because they learn it's the only way to survive. But I want to break the cycle

[AngryCarl3]

We belong to our little clans. Kindness typically doesn't extend beyond the clan. And people in the clan are also assholes.

[Shiprex]

People have become conditioned to think about themselves only these days

[TonyMetal___86]

Because the majority of people had lost their morals and values...

[Anonymous]

Satan has dominion over this world. God allows his influence. And man is evil by nature and falls short of the glory of God.

[Snakeyes7]

Because there is a difference between kindness and letting people walk all over you.

[CuriousMufuxka]

Nothing is free. Even kindness comes at a price..

[blackeagle007]

Because we are consumed with tv media and social. It’s running our lives

[Dullie]

This a big problem amongst people, also as kids we were taught dont speak to strangers

[Hopeless30]

Because not everyone have heart like you in this world.

[Jeff51]

Society has changed. Im mostly nice.

[Cidknee]

Pride.

[jahaims]

Human nature

[fish5505_87]

Sadly, true!