Why is he so consistent?

Question

The first day I met my co-worker, he let me know through his actions that he found me attractive/had feelings for me. Since then, he's been very consistent with me in going out after work and he has given me his phone number as well for us to keep in touch. Although I accepted his number, I never called him or texted him (it's been about 2 months now if me not doing this). I also always refused going out by making up some lame excuse. I do have to admit, I liked the attention I was getting and would flirt back but I never let it get out of control. I always kept it at work. Anyways, he sees me the other day and he tells me that I should text him sometime if I still had his number. I didn't want to tell him face to face that I didn't like him so I ended up texting him and I explained the whole thing. I told him I didn't want to get involved with anybody from work and that I ended a long-term relationship not too long ago and that I wasn't ready to step in to another. I told him that I was sorry if I confused him in anyway by my actions and he told me that he understood and that he wasn't confused. Next thing I know, he keeps texting me asking me how my day went? I mean, didn't you get the message dude? What do I do?

MaxwellSmart · Accepted Answer

Ahh, the old "I think my coworker likes me" situation. I went through something very similar to this and this is what happened:

I asked for her number, she said no and started acting weird, I tried to make things better and she wouldn't have it, so I left her alone. After a few weeks of not talking, she started trying to make small talk, to which I wouldn't really respond and she got upset at me. WHy? I don't know, she clearly wanted to be left alone in the first place.

So after that, we started being a bit sarcastic towards each other whenever we saw each other (funny enough, we both have extremely sarcastic sense of humor) and we kept at it, we started talking more and more with our sarcasm and this is how we communicate now. We never have a regular chat, we are always teasing each other and talking crap, but we are always laughing and smiling, so it became our second language.

After a while of this, we started having a lot of tension (sexual maybe?) and kinda arguing a lot with each other to the point we would stop talking to each other but now when that happens she always goes looking for me or if I'm quiet, she'll start throwing little remarks at me, probably hoping I respond. We have made it very clear we are not friends at all, but our coworkers think we are more than that because of the way we interact.

My point is, is very easy to reject people and tell them "DUH, don't you get it? I'm not attracted" but life has a funny way of turning things around and make sure you don't end up upset all day at work because he doesn't want to talk or joke with you, because that can make the day a LOT longer. She is very friendly and talks to everybody at work but everybody can tell that what we have between us, goes beyond all that, she had her chance and turning into a bitch when a guy likes you may not be the best idea, because you never know what may happen in the future

thebossman · Accepted Answer

if he didn't get the message the first time with you being polite tell him next time with some force to leave you alone. don't be like hey dude leave me the f alone. just be like I've already told you I don't want to get invloved with you so please lose my number.