Why do I have such a hard time forgiving myself for hurting my ex?

It's been almost two years ever since I've spoken to her and it's likely that I'll never speak to her again. At the end of our very last conversation she said she forgives me, but till this day I still hold a lot of guilt and regret.


I'm at work right now and I'm taking a break, I had a flashback and I started to feel like crying.

I think about it all almost every day, along with other troubling matter, I try to fight the thoughts though.
Why do I have such a hard time forgiving myself for hurting my ex?
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