My ex is saying he’s over me but is doing everything to prove otherwise?

[Anonymous]

My ex has not changed his habits at all with me after we broke up after a huge fight 3 weeks ago. We were together for 3 years. The only things that have changed are that we don’t follow each other anymore on Instagram and we don’t talk on the phone anymore.

Other than that, he’s asking if I’m seeing anyone constantly, trying to get too many details on my life, viewing every single one of my Instagram stories , and staring at me or trying to get my attention constantly. ( we work together )

Then he will turn around and randomly say he’s so much happier single, but every one of his actions prove to be the opposite. He seems to go through major mood swings where one second he’s jealous, then the next he shows he doesn’t care.

This upsets me because I wouldn’t mind getting a long and being friends.

Updates

+1 y

And he’s also viewing every single story I post despite not following each other. I do not view any of his.

[Oliverlogan263]

Damn, that sounds confusing as hell. Your ex is definitely sending mixed signals.

On the one hand, he says he's over it but then acts jealous and keeps checking up on you. And mood swings are never a good sign - guess he's still figuring his feelings out.

Working together just makes everything super awkward too. No wonder you feel all over the place.

My advice? Don't even try being friends yet if that's what you want long run. Dudes gotta sort his shit out before y'all can be cool.

For now straight up ignore him as much as you can at work. No convos about personal stuff, just stay professional. Don't give him any ammo.

If he asks about other dudes again just say it's none of his business. Dude needs to get used to the fact you're single now!

Once he calms down and isn't weird maybe try chatting civilly down the line. But for your own sanity, keep that man at arm's length until he makes up his mind 100%. Ain't nobody got time for games, feel?

You'll be aiight, just stay focused on you for now. His flip flopping ain't your problem no more!

[Asker]

I agree, but now I feel like he’s going the extra mile to try and hurt me and do subtle little things to grab my attention because I didn’t beg for him. Yes I’m upset, but I don’t really want to be back together. However we spent a lot of time as friends as well so I’m hoping down the line we can be civil again.

[Oliverlogan263]

Aye now that's mad whack of him tryna play little mind games like that just cuz you ain't begging! Dude gotta grow up fr.

Clearly he's hurt his ego that he lost such a dope chick without a fight, so now he tryna make you as confused/upset as him. Real lame if you ask me sis.

But good lookin out stayin strong and not givin him the satisfaction. Hold that head high - he'll see soon enough he messed up!

Maybe down the line if he pulls his head out his ass, you could rekindle the friend vibe. But for now keep it pushin - it'll drive him nuts seein he can't rattle you no more haha.

Stay glowin queen, let your light shine so bright he gotta shade his eyes! Can't stress what's in the past, you livin your best life is the biggest "F you" to him fr. Keep winning girl!

[Asker]

Thank you so much for the advice and I appreciate your kind words

[Oliverlogan263]

You're very welcome luv and of course anytime

[Nikki1989]

He is not over you. This is borderline stalking.