What to do after healing from a breakup?

[scott04sa22]

I still haven't decided if I want to start dating again ( not now ). I been mostly thinking about trying friends with benefits again, but those have ugly endings. Almost every time I find someone either way, they end up moving on very fast. I figure I'll won't get hurt as bad after my previous breakup with my ex-girlfriend. I know I should do a full romantic relationship, but I get hurt all the time, and I know it sucks. I'm worried if I'll start another relationship, she'll used me again like my ex-girlfriend did. I know it gets better in time, but everybody is different. I'm not in no hurry on this.

[Oliverlogan263]

Man, I totally get where you're coming from. Breakups suck big time, especially when someone really hurt you. It's normal to feel scared about opening yourself up to that kind of pain again.

Honestly though, a friends with benefits situation probably isn't the healthiest choice right now either. Those rarely end well and could just mess with your head more. I'd say take some real time to heal - focus on yourself, your hobbies, your bros. Do stuff that makes you feel happy and confident again without anyone else.

When you feel truly ready to start seeing people, go slow. Don't jump right into a relationship - maybe try just casual dates with no expectations at first. Get comfortable hanging with a girl one-on-one again before getting serious. And pay close attention - make sure she seems caring, trustworthy and honest before catching real feelings.

It'll take time, but I promise there are good women out there who won't use or hurt you. Don't let your last breakup poison your view of all girls. Just look out for red flags and don't be afraid to walk if you start seeing them again. Know your self-worth, dude. You've got this!

[scott04sa22]

friends with benefits probably won't happen, but it could. I am gonna start making some new friends but start slow. I do feel a lot better now than a month ago since the breakup happened. Also, the right person comes unexpectedly and she's gonna be special

[Oliverlogan263]

Dude for sure, taking it slow is the way to go. friends with benefits could maybe work out down the road once you're fully over your ex, but no need to rush into anything. Making new friends without any pressure of dating is a chill way to start putting yourself back out there.

I'm glad to hear you're feeling better than a month ago - that's awesome progress man. Breakups suck so much at first, but it does get easier with time. Keep staying busy with your hobbies and the homies too.

And I totally agree, the best relationships sometimes happen when you least expect it. So don't stress if you're not actively looking. Just focus on being your best self and having fun, and maybe the right girl will come into your life naturally. But no rush! You do you for now bro. Hit me up if you ever want to grab a beer or something - I'm always down to kick it.

[DarkLegacy]

Find a friend with benefits. It is awful that all your gfs end up cheating on you. That is modern women for you.

[DishLady]

It's important to get back out there so the dust doesn't settle on your heart and start making you bitter. It doesn't have to be "dating" specifically, but it should be something that is social and makes you happy (e. g., a group hike/jog/sporting event/travel opportunity/etc.; volunteering with friends, etc.). It should be something that keeps your mind and body busy but also offers the opportunity to expand your social circle (to meet someone new) while doing something you enjoy. The "volunteering with friends" example offers an additional "safety net" for the shy folks who need a wingman when they're feeling down and bummed out.

[scott04sa22]

I cut my Sunday hours at work so I can spend time with my younger brother at his woodshop

[DishLady]

See? Nice. I have another friend who did something similar -- his brother's bike/car repair shop. He spends a lot of time tinkering while healing and trying to put himself back out there.

[Paris13]

You may Reunite. You never Know. GO SLOW. xxoo

[scott04sa22]

All my ex girlfriends cheated on me

[Paris13]

Ahh Well, Then Hopefully Find One that doesn't. xxoo

[scott04sa22]

It's probably not gonna happen, Everybody I know is either taken or don't want relationships or friends with benefits. I'm not gonna chase my co-workers either.

[Paris13]

Thank You, dear. xxoo