I’ve just ended an 8 year relationship. We have known each other 15 plus years. Our relationship was open, and we was allowed sex or certain types of sexual contact with agreed partners throughout the relationship, and we often took part in group sex sessions. None of that is relevant as such, but I guess our relationship was a little different in regards to the average. That aside we was very much in love, we was best friends first and foremost, I always felt loved and wanted by him which only helped in an open relationship. I never felt jealous because I always felt he would always choose me, and they were such a physical pleasure. 6 months ago I got pregnant and things felt different afterwards, the baby wasn’t planned (and yes it was 100% his; we use protection.) but we agreed to keep the baby, and felt excited. We agreed to end the open relationship until I felt comfortable enough to continue after the baby was born. Sadly at 15 weeks I lost the baby, and I can’t put my finger on it, or find the words but I just didn’t feel he was supportive enough. Maybe it was all in my head, I know it was difficult for him too. I voiced this, on many occasions and he agreed to make more effort, but afterwards nothing he done felt enough, and with his failure to try harder I gave up and ended things 6 weeks ago, it’s almost 7. It’sthe longest we’re never had contact for, it’s been tough but I’ve felt a sense of calm too. I’ve cried a lot, and I’ve wiped my own tears and realised I don’t need a man to do it. He hasn’t contacted or tried to contact me once, I have blocked him on social media etc but if he wanted to it’s possible and easy enough to contact me. Part of me thinks he’s letting me have my moment, and expects me to come running back with my tail between my legs. The other says he’s respecting my boundaries and quite possibly wants to reach out but isn’t becus I made it clear it was over, the other is he doesn’t care atall and has found out he’s happier without me.
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