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2Opinion
I am not receiving the Therapy I so desperately need (ex has driven me to suicide), so I went looking for my own 'therapy'.
A) Smoke weed
B) Tattoos
Since I have started to plaster my body full with tattoos 2.5 years ago (I had only 1 tattoo before that), my self-esteem has risen tremendously. Besides the fact that I am too skinny due to neglecting myself (I don't eat a lot/ proper diet), I am very satisfied about my body now which of course has a very positive effect on my mental state.
I am still a recluse; I live the life of a Hermit and suffer severely from Social Anxiety and possibly Agoraphobia... but here's the funny thing, because I am so satisfied with my own body I love to 'prance around town like a Peacock'; I am very easily approachable by strangers and I love to have conversations with those people. People are always surprised when I tell them I have severe anxiety and that I am insecure, because you cannot tell by looking at me... You'd think I am overconfident.
When it's nice weather outside, I love to put on some nice clothes... favourite set is my 20 eyelet boots, Levi 501, Braces, White Buttoned shirt, Black Sweater Vest, Newsboy Cap or Flat Cap... or my Scottish Kilt... and I will always remove my top so I can show off my tattoos.
I was invisible the 11 years I was with my ex... No one really seems to know her either (not even neighbours know who she is even though she has lived in that flat for 25 years).
As soon as I was 'free' from her (I am still imprisoned in my head) people started to notice me... and people were positive about me! That was new to me.
People recognise me, people whom I have never met, or remember me... people cross the street to come to me to make a compliment about my looks or because they recognise I am a Skinhead and want to talk about the good old days (sadly before my time).
This is all so new to me... but I love it; despite suffering from social anxiety
Focus on personal growth and development
Therapy