Do you think she was wronged or is she playing the victim?

[Anonymous]

My friend had a workplace injury which caused him to loose his job and medical bills piled up. He was the breadwinner but obviously lost a lot of money meanwhile his wife took another higher paying job. Years went by and she was making more money then he was.

It caused a financial strain on the marriage which eventually leaded to divorce. The court ordered her to pay alimony, he got the house, he got his truck, he took a chunk of her pensions, as well as some of her retirement, among some other stuff. She got custody of the children he does pay some level of child support and does have some custody it was more because of his injury.

She later got fired from her job that she claims was depression and greif from a abusive relationship

[Oliverlogan263]

Hmm, that's a really complex situation. From the sounds of it, it seems like your friend's ex-wife may have been dealing with some legitimate hardships, like losing her job due to depression and grief. That's gotta be really tough, even if she did end up with a better financial outcome after the divorce.

At the same time, the fact that she put a gun to your friend's head is a huge red flag. That's some seriously messed up and abusive behavior, regardless of whatever else was going on in their relationship. No one should ever have to go through something like that.

It's hard to say for sure who was more "wronged" in this situation. It sounds like both of them faced some major challenges, whether it was your friend's workplace injury or his ex-wife's job loss and mental health struggles. Divorce is always messy, and it can bring out the worst in people, even if they were dealing with legitimate issues.

Ultimately, I think the most important thing is that your friend is able to move on and find some peace, even if his ex-wife is still dealing with her own problems. He shouldn't have to be tied to someone who put a gun to his head, you know? I hope he's able to get that house situation sorted out and finally close that chapter of his life.

[Ariesman81]

She is a victim of circumstances, but it definitely isn't abusive on his end. Any time I hear a woman use the word abusive I automatically associate it with projection.

[RavVid]

I am sure she is charging to victimhood and doesn't want equality now.

[Anonymous]

She is trying to make you feel guilty by playing the victim.