After a breakup, is it healthier to stay friends or cut all contact?

[sage2021]

I believe that if things don't seem to work out romantically for two people, what would be the point to continue another type of relationship with them? All you're doing is just putting on another hat.

[nolabels]

Hmm, I don't know.

I never have in the past, but the past is the past.
Every situation is different.

Your question is as to whether or not it is healthy to do so.
I tend to gauge things by how I perceive things at any given moment, while giving due to acknowledgement of the past.
There may be ups and downs if remaining as friends, but that happens at times among friends who've never been romantically involved, anyway, although maybe less intensely, depending on what the heck happens to be going on in the friendship (lol).

If all contact is cut, it's cut.
There are no more chances for friendship when ties are irrevocably cut.
Cutting ties on one end may afterward result in the ties being cut from the other end, also, which makes for a really sticky wicket if the first person to cut ties then reconsiders at a later date and then wishes for reconnection as friends.

As long, though, as abuse from either party doesn't rear its ugly head, remaining as friends could be mutually beneficial.

Those are my thoughts.

Cheers to you!

[nolabels]

Thanks for MHO!

[sage2021]

@nolabels

You're very welcome! 🙂🧡

[AgentG111]

If you're able to remain friends and or civil with each other that's terrific if not got all ties walk away go forward

[sage2021]

@AgenG111
Nope! He's not being civil whatsoever! He thinks he's pretty funny and having a good time putting me down.
Cuckoo in the cabeza! 🤪🤪

[AgentG111]

Ha 10-96 5150 ! Leave him in the rear view

[Finchie40]

Cut all ties with them , unless you have kids’ together like I do with my ex , her and I know we are no longer good for each other whatsoever, but we don’t hate each other , so to be mature and respectful about it , we are trying to stay mutual for the kids’ sake. But it hasn’t been easy , I think once her and I sell the house and completely go our separate ways , things will be better between us on a friendly level

[sage2021]

@Fimchie40
You know that I always wish you the very best with all of your endeavors in your life.

But because of the way that your wife behaves sometimes, you might want to consider setting some ground rules right away when you go your separate ways.
For instance, no more putting you down. 👇🏼 Period.
No arguments, especially in front of the children.
If she comes in your new place, tell her that you are living a very peaceful life now and that is how you are going to be striving for from now on.
She must behave under your roof. Period.
You've put up with her and the bad things she's done to you long enough and that she is not allowed to treat you in that manner anymore.

I'm sure you will think of ground rules of your own, but I just wanted to throw those out there and you can take them or leave them.

Life is just too darn short! Ya know?

[Finchie40]

Yea I already had a big talk with her about everything and we finally came to an understanding and agreement, so there hasn’t been anymore fighting , mainly because she knows she doesn’t matter to me anymore if she gets that way. Now that she realizes I have moved on , she is now kind of debating whether she made
The right decision or not , I told her the only thing that her and I can have is friendship but that’s it cuz I am moving on and I want to eventually meet someone else that treats me better

[sage2021]

@Finchie40
Good for you!! YAY! 😊

[Simslover92]

I think it depends on how you broke up. If you broke up amicably then it is possible to still be friends. Look at Jerry and Elaine for example from Seinfeld. They broke up amicably and remained friends. You just have to go in agreeing that that's what you will only be afterwards and have no feelings for each other which is possible though I will admit hard to do if you've been with each other longer than a year.

[NathanDavis]

two of my exes are my best friends today

however... we became friends first, and we remained friends after

if we have had a horrible, bad, break-up... I am sure we would not be in touch anymore, lol

so, I think it is healthy to stay friends with someone you were/can be friends with... but it would be better to cut off ties with someone you had a terrible time with, that would just make no sense at all

[Tarifa]

I just can't stay in contact. I've had several break ups, and big crushes that remained unanswered. I prefer not to see her anymore, rather than have lingering feelings. Some doors are best shut forever.

[Unycorn]

Depends the persons. Usually should be working to stay good friends.

If someone grieves could need a break amd distance before. But all are grown, right? So why not?

[Sal_Monella]

Never look back. You broke up for a reason. That reason is still present.

[sage2021]

Sal_Monella

You got that right! 👍🏼 He's a real jerk and that's putting it mildly compared to what he's saying about me. Grrrrrr! 🤬

[Sal_Monella]

In my ancestral culture, sometimes you have to get revenge.

[sage2021]

@Sal_Monella
He's mad at me because he wanted us to be "close friends" and I said NO to that.

So I guess he's being the revengeful one. I'm better than that.

[Sal_Monella]

His purpose was to control you post facto. Maybe get some residual sex.

[exitseven]

Put them in the rear view. People want to remain friends in the hope that the dumper will change their mind, It never works out.

[Drumlin2001]

Unless kids invovled or you have history before you dated, clean break

[FunkyMonkee]

I've stayed friends with some of my ex's and there's no harm done by any of us.

[Surely]

Usually when the other person gets into a new relationship. They are not allowed to be friends with an ex!

[douride2]

in my opinion for most breakups it is better to cease all contacts.

[molonski2]

Never cut anything clean , life is Grey and far from Black / White.

[TonyMetal___86]

100% agree, CUT the ties!

[dudeinohio]

Definitely cut all contact forever.

[Jeff51]

Well. If it ended badly then no contact.

[Xawyx-2]

I think it's better to stay friends.

[sage2021]

@Xawyz-2

Maybe with certain people but not when they have turned against you for no reason.
I won't give a person the time of day if they treated me unkind.

[Xawyx-2]

I agree, completely.

[Shrimpenjoyer]

Cut it all.

[In_Trance]

Cut all contact