Ex doesn't want to burn bridges?? Should I do the deed?

[Anonymous]

So my boyfriend broke up with me 2 months ago stating that he couldn't see a future with me (it was a long distance relationship) and some other reasons that I found to be rather contradicting. It hurt a lot since I wasn't expecting this and thought everything was normal. The thing is, he doesn't want us to be strangers and doesn't want to burn bridges between us. We've been keeping in touch with one another by emailing once a week. While I'm glad that he's still willing to talk to me, I think its also making me think more about him and miss him more to the point where I can't stop thinking about him. Is it better to cut off all ties with him? I know this sounds rather stupid but this was my first relationship so I'm super confused as to what to do.

Thank you so much for your help! >.< *bows*

[Iheartsrk]

I'd say you should cut all ties with him, at least for a while. You have to give yourself time to get over him. Once you give yourself sometime, maybe you can rekindle a friendship. I honestly think cutting him off completely would be ideal, and since it's long distance it might not be too hard to achieve. But I was in a similar situation, and my ex and I are still friends (although our relationship is complicated...and I don't know if I'd recommend it). But part of the reason we're still friends is because I see him fairly regularly and he's friends with my friends, it would be hard to get rid of him. And I think it's not completely healthy for me to continue to talk to him and I continue to have feelings for him although they have dulled somewhat, but not without a lot of pain. So if you can cut him off completely it'll be better for you in the long run, but I know that's easier said than done. So if you can't help yourself, at least give yourself a month or two without him.

[whuanting]

my suggestion is you should cut off all your ties and forget him.as he said he could not see a futrure on you so I think he will never come back.so why do you waste your time on such a person who is not really worthy?

so just go ahead.

[Asker]

I guess what makes it harder is we were best friends prior to our previous boyfriend/girlfriend relationship so maybe he wants to go back to that again? Thank you for your input! I'll keep it in mind as I struggle to make a decision...wow that sounds more dramatic than intended. -__-;

[Asker]

Ah and while he did say that he couldn't see a future with me, he went on to say that maybe in the future we just might get together again, who knows? Like I said, contradicting words. >.<

[taster]

I cannot answer this for you..are you usually aware of when you are being used? "Should I do the deed?" You are referring to having sex? Then your relationship has devolved into FWB...if you are OK with the two of you using each other...but I don't see any future in that...just in case you merely meant "being friends" then it does not sound as though you are ready for that...unless there is something I am not seeing here...you need to sever the ties..for now anyway...o.O

[Asker]

Ah my apologies for being unclear. By "doing the deed", I meant breaking all ties with him. Basically erasing him out of my life. Thank you for your feedback, much appreciated! ^^

[taster]

OK..I am glad you are not thinking of allowing a relationship to devolve into FWB! (:(:(:...But it does not sound as though you are ready to be friends? I am on amiable terms with most of my exes.I just talked some to my last ex (prior to my marriage) from 24 years ago...and I told her she could FB me..I honestly don't think I could rekindle with any of my exes...they are good women and good people...I rekindled for awhile with one ex (she is the one I talk about who was 6'1") eh..it is tough

[Anonymous]

Should you do the deed? If you want, then go ahead.