Dating a Geek (Pros & Cons)

[Ambroise]

We girls are always looking for the intellectuals. And this is good, because it means that we seek to develop ourselves in our relations. But sometimes it gives a lift excess effect. Half a year ago I started dating a geek. He seemed to me as very interesting person and that was enough to ensure that I was fascinated by him. BUT! It did not take a lot of time in order for me to understand that not every smart guy is an ideal in a relationship. My beloved was a 100% introvert (this is often characteristic of a computer genius), and expressly reflected on my relationships with family and friends. All the time we spent at home. A full social life could be forgotten.

This went on for a couple of months, as long as his aversion to others didn`t make me feel completely fed up. Also during these two months I've really missed my friends, and that was the last reason to break up.

Moral of the story: girls, it`s better to have a geek-friend than date him! Believe me)

[Anonymous]

I totally disagree with your take. I'm a computer geek and actually no, I'm not much of a gamer, I only play 1 game and every year when the new game comes yeah, I spend lots of my time playing it until I finish the single player and then I just quit gaming for the rest of the year. And your issue is stemming from being an extrovert dating a "100% introvert". Please stop stereotyping computer geeks because we already have these stereotypes about us that because we're good with computers that means that our lives revolve around freaking computers. No, not all of us wear big glasses and not all of us have no style and ignore our appearances.

[Anonymous]

I don't think that applies to all. If you are an extrovert and prefer to spend all your time with other people you can't get a long with an introvert and most geeks are a bit introverted. Smart people spend a lot of time on their own reflecting. That's the characteristic attribute of intellectuals.

[EmiliaRose2355]

I guess that would make me an intellectual too then! Haha

[Wizbit]

"Pros and Cons"? Where? This is just " my ex was bad because... "
Here's some pros:
- all that gaming makes them VERY good with their fingers ;-)
- geeks tend to be more genuine and comfortable with themselves
- geeks are generally much kinkier in the bedroom
- geeks want to do more than just hang out with other people; they want to spend time alone with you doing things together
- less likely to be out without you

Cons:
- not so fashionable
- have to spend time together engaging with each other
- may have to forget inhibitions and do geek stuff like Comicon or games nights

Yes I date a geek. He plays a lot of computer games, reads comic books and is very "science yay!" We stay in and play games (board games - I'm not computery), play games with friends, get very drunk at the pub, and have wild and very kinky sex.

I've dated another geek. He was less positive. Didn't like going out or seeing people. Still no trouble interacting with me or select others (as long as it was in a home, not out).

Married a non-geek, average guy. He went clubbing, socialised etc. Also spent all his time gaming - complete WOW obsession.

Definitely know which one I prefer. Geek all the way. Sounds to me (and others) you had a compatibility issue with introvert/extrovert not geeks.

[Mekkalyn]

Well, dating a "geek" is perfect for me, because apparently I'm a geek too!
Anyone that doesn't like to have a lot of friends (I don't have any outside of my fiance), is considered a geek? I don't really see the point of a social life. Friends don't stick around forever. I'd rather focus on things that will add value to my life than deal with other people.

Plus, I just find other people really annoying.

But anyways, moral of the story: dating a "geek" is perfectly fine as long as you are both geeks!

[fondue]

This was like, one pro and one con. Lol. And the moral of the story seems to be it's better for you, in particular, to be friends with a geek rather than date them. You can date an introvert and still maintain a social life if you want - well, I know other people can, can't speak for you.

[thewanderingme]

um... you do know that your life doesn't have to resolve around the person you're dating, right? that was your own fault, not his. did he forbid you to go out with your friends? you could have easily gone out with friends, then met up with him after.

[Anonymous]

I can say from experience this is true.

Also: expect him to pick video games over sex every time. Expect to have NO sex life. I had to break up with mine because he would not leave his game for anything. He would sit on it until 4am every night. I would wear a sexy outfit or even just walk in there naked. Asking. And nope. "No I'm in the middle of a game" but the game never ends. I would never ever date one of these guys again.

[Mekkalyn]

I don't think that applies to all geeks... because mine will jump at the chance to have sex, no matter what he's doing... even in the middle of Fallout 4! And if you know anything about video games, that says something :P

I think you just so happened to find someone that wasn't interested in sex.

[Mekkalyn]

And I think he also had a gaming addiction.
Which is really not healthy.
But I don't think that's the "norm" for a geek.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah I wouldn't be surprised if he had an addiction. He played all day and night and didn't work, all he did was play games and didn't even take care of himself.

He was the only geek I ever dated but my mom had the same problems with my dad and it destroyed their marriage. So id never ever date one again because I gave it a chance and it proved to me that I need someone who would rather spend time with his girlfriend than his games... :/ I've got a feeling if I dated another geek it would probably just be the same thing over again. One of my friends dated a nerd and had the same result. Most of them just like games more than humans.

[Wizbit]

Not a geek issue. Definitely don't have a lack of sex issue with mine. Me and my geek haven't even had clothes on since I finished work yesterday ;-) Absolutely no issues there.

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah I don't know it's hard to say. That was the issue with mine and one of my friends dated 2 geeks and both hers were like that too. So I assumed it's probably typical. And I'm back to dating jocks so I can actually have a sex life. :) with a guy who knows what he's doing and would rather play with a woman than a computer.

[Anonymous]

It will always be hard to get him away from video games, I think that's the worst part. He will avoid socializing for the most part. like my ex, I mean I like video games too but he even made his friends stop trying to get his attention after a while. I'm all for smart guys but I will NEVER date another gamer, they would rather be alone in the end.

[AmethystAngel]

You way of living and other attributes didn't match... that doesn't mean that other would feel the same as you, some girls actually prefer guys who do not talk much instead bask in the quiet time all the time, I mean I feel headache as well as jaw ache if I talk or speak more than 8 minutes and that would be a record time for me.

[Caryl]

My boyfriend is "geek", so am I, and neither of us is "ignoring " each other. We have time for everything. Some girls like "geek" boys and others don't

[bradbradley]

will you pm me if you dont mind?

[dejeson]

I think dating a geek can be a cool experience because you can spend your time learning amazing things for them that you never knew... and you can also teach them if your patient enough

[Jayded1]

This is more an introvert not compatible with a extrovert. Which makes sense.

[sjoes006]

I actually think the two can be VERY compatible. Take an introverted engineer (the kind of guy I usually date). He is really good with the technical aspects of business but often not the social schmoozing aspect of networking mixers and what not. He just wants to talk about the reason he is there, his idea/ invention or what have you. But you can't just go into it like that, you sell them on you then the product.

For me I usually serve as a warm buffer in those situation and help the flow of things. But I benefit well too on my business end of what I do because our different ways of thinking compliment each other. Then when we are alone it doesn't matter because we are ourselves with each other.

Two extroverts or introverts sometimes have a hard time having a convo. The two extroverts try to one up each other or fight for the seat without even realizing it whereas two introverts can make other people uncomfortable and come off as standoffish at gatherings.

[Jayded1]

@sjoes006 Oh I wasn't saying it can't work. I was more stating in the posters case this has nothing to do with geeky men being undateable in general. Which she directly says. The original post is actually extremely narrow minded and stupid however I was trying to be nice and point out in her case what may have happened.

[mishiii]

A geek to me is a guy with no brains or plays videogames and calls himself intelligent. They are destined to grow up and someday attain maturity

[Wizbit]

Nope, that was my EX-husband - the one who wasn't a geek

[Anonymous]

"Moral of the story: girls, it`s better to have a geek-friend than date him! Believe me)"

So you're saying geeks should never be able to have relationships a family of their own or any romantic love?

[MysteriousFlower]

That take could of been elaborated. I think it comes down to the maturity levels.

[abundantlyrich]

They usually struggle with the emotional component. That's their missing link.

[coolk17]

Stop telling girls, not to date us, geeks. I'm the good looking type of "geek", I would wanna text my girl and talk to her before I play video games. What's wrong with playing with him? Why is that forbidden in your mind?

[Bards]

Yes fix my computers and do my homework and then maybe you can get to wreck the puss
Maybe

[Anonymous]

What the hell is wrong with staying home and screwing?

When, of course, you need a break from the video games.

[sweetkiss99]

Where is the actual pros and cons _of this?