Why is she "mirroring" my behavior?

[Anonymous]

Ok so I've had a thing for a girl for the longest now. I think she had a thing for me before I had a thing for her, but nevertheless I'm bent over this girl for some reason, but she's in a relationship. Nothing has between us for obvious reasons. We've had this vicious cycle of seemingly playing games with each other. We used to talk everyday but she disappear in me. So I would ignore her then she'd come back. Over and over again. I talked about other girls around her. She flirts with my friend in front of me. I ignore her hard for 2 months, and am cold and aloof to her. First she would come looking for me, then she got mad. She goes and walks and talks with my buddy, finding out about it when he told
Me it was happening and it was weirding him out. I skip group work lunches, she skips work lunches. Etc etc the list goes seems to go on. Why does she mirror my behavior like this if she only wants to be buddies?

[autumnrosee]

I think she definitely likes you but is trying to play that spiteful girl who wants you to feel the way she does when you do it to her. Dating is already complicated enough, if it makes you upset enough to ask on here then quit playing games! Sit down with her and ask her how she really feels and talk about it. If you expect anything to happen with this girl communication is extremely important.

[legalboxers]

1 word.. KARMA. you give what you get..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DL7-CKirWZE

[BDP_Mari04]

Make a move before it's too late,.. She may have a bf but that's most likely temporary, you'll never know until you do something

[Daavid]

Ok but why does she do this?:)

[BDP_Mari04]

she's seeking some hardcore attention and she sees your friend as a weak spot towards you

[Daavid]

How do you mean a weak spot? I ignored her pretty hard for almost a month and a half and my buddy tells me she's been walking and talking with him like her and I used to. I didn't know about it until he told me about it and he said out was kind of creeping him out lol.

[BDP_Mari04]

Well then in that case cut her off if you feel that she's just fucking around with you and your homies head,... if you don't it's just going to be a continuous pattern:/

[Daavid]

Is that what's she's doing? Why continuous pattern?

[BDP_Mari04]

Because if you ignore her she's just going to hop back and forth with you and your friend,(unhealthy)

[Daavid]

Agreed! Why though? Why would a girl do that? Can you explain that to me? In an idiot with this stuff:)

[BDP_Mari04]

Either she's a hoodrat (hoe) or she's just really never received attention from a guy so she sees both of you as prey while she's just getting the "best of both worlds"

[Daavid]

I see. She's def not a hoe. Is there a way to tell who she likes?

[llallbh]

Because she's jealous and trying to make you feel the same way you're making her feel.

[Daavid]

Jealous like how?

[Anonymous]

I think you're reading too much into it, to be honest. Stop focusing so much on her.

[findingdreamland]

Because she has not got over you yet.

[Asker]

How do you mean?

[findingdreamland]

She has still feelings for you.

[Asker]

How can you tell by this though?

[BrunetteNYC]

If people are NOT emotionally invested in one another, they don't bother at all to play such games, period.

[findingdreamland]

She simply avoids you. Ignoring is a reaction even it is not a good one. It means she is not ready to see you. Feelings are still alive. She is trying to deal with it.

[Asker]

I agree with what you are saying. We work together but things are hit and miss with her. It's like sometimes she's wanting to be close or friends again and sometimes cold and aloof. I have been trying to be much nicer with her. This morning I am pretty sure she bumped into me on purpose to walk and talk with me she seemed happy to see me. Then I email her "hey a bunch of guys and I are grabbing lunch want to join us?" She emails flatly "I have alt going on so I will be unable to join" no thanks for invite nothing. I knew she wouldn't go I just wanted to be nice and invite her. What's with that? Does it sound like someone had already asked her?

[findingdreamland]

It means she has finally moved on. You can be still friends then. Things seem to be turning into normal.

[Asker]

How so? Even though she was looking to talk to me? How do you figure? I figured she would have said oh thanks for the invite but I can't make it

[findingdreamland]

When will man kind able to read women even a little bit? lol If she liked you, she would jumped into invitation , trust me. If a girl likes a guy, nothing can stop her.

[Asker]

Ok well she is married, lol do you think that has anything to do?

[findingdreamland]

Why do not say me before Christ Sake! She has been flirting openly i mean even she is married. LOL Well she got cought or sth. Or she just wanted to have fun. Sorry she kinda used you.

[Asker]

This is why things are so strange because when we first met she was meeting me constantly to talk like everyday then she'd disappear on me. The. Come back and repeat the cycle. I got mad at her for this and would ignore her and she'd come back and repeat the cycle over again. I talked about other girls in front of her and she flirted with my buddy in front of me. I ignored her for like 2 months and found out she had bee. Walking and talking with my buddy like her and I used to. He told me and said it was creeping him out. We started talking again my buddy left I backed off her again and she has been acting like aloof and cold distant too busy to talk etc, but will switch it up on me and be nice and friends. I've been trying to be better and nicer and friends but things are so weird and confusing. I can't tell if she has feelings for me it what the hell actually happened here?

[findingdreamland]

Let me tell you. Stay away from this woman. Do not be third person. It seems exciting whatever, but it is not.
She seems she has been searching a fuckbody or sth and she found. That is why she lost interest in you. Or the things that she has done , came out somehow. And her husband knows it.

I do not think she ever felt sth for you. Nothing good there , man.

[Asker]

I def thought you were on to something, but no way she is looking to cheat. I figured she had a crush on me and we were playing games with each other. This has been going on for over a year now. Back and forth up and down. I don't get her behavior if she never felt anything to be honest, you even said it yourself?

[findingdreamland]

Do you REALYY get involved with a married woman? If you were the husband, what would you feel?
What can be changed if she felt sth?
If she wanted to be with you, she would leave the husband first, then you. She would not put you in a position like this.

[Asker]

I don't no. I like her, but am more confused by her behavior than anything. I feel like she has just acted so strange with me for so long and we've both played games with each other. It is just really confusing. I really don't know what she's looking for that's why I'm here to find answers. Please don't think poorly of me. It's complicated

[findingdreamland]

Come on! How i can judge you. It is not my thing.
I truly understand you. You feel sth about this woman. You really want it works. But this is not the reality. Come back to the reality. It is harsh, ugly and difficult to accept. But it is there.
Your feelings avoid you to accept. A married woman will never ever bring you a happiness. You know what they say. Once a cheater always a cheater. Cheesy as hell, but true.
Just stay away from her for a while. You will understand. You need some time to relax.

[Asker]

This is true and I do. She like chased me in the beginning and out herself around me l the time. How do you explain her strange behavior?

[findingdreamland]

I explained already. But you do not want to accept. She found another guy to be together. Or she got caught. My explanation.

[Asker]

I promise it's neither. :/

This was kind of funny. A few months back I said hey what's for lunch? She says oh my husbands home in going to meet him. I say oh cool. Later right before lunch I'm in the breakroom and she comes in. I say "lunchtime?" She says "no I'm meeting my husband!" Lol I was only asking if it was time! :)

[findingdreamland]

You seriously need a therapist to get over this obsession. Just Sayin'

[Asker]

Haha this is probably true...

You did a complete 180 when I told you she was married

[findingdreamland]

You want to hear what you want to. It doesn't work like that. This is why you did not tell me at the begining :)

[Asker]

Haha true, but what would be the difference between if she was single and if she's married? Do you think she is in capable of having feelings for me because of this? I ask this question without saying she's married because people (like you :) immediately jump all over me and jump to conclusions and I get a distorted answer. The only way I can ask is without

[findingdreamland]

Of course it would be different. A taken girl is taken. You stop there. All you can do is that.

[Asker]

She's taken for sure. Is it wrong that I want answers on how she acts towards me? How weird and awkward things have been? People rip me for asking these questions. I just want an explanation

[findingdreamland]

Sometimes ignorance is bliss :)

[Asker]

So if she wasn't married she was trying to get over me. Since she's married she's a hoe and was using me and trying to find a fuck buddy. Gee thanks

[LifeEqualsLove]

Giving you a taste of your own medicine.

[Daavid]

Really? You think so?

[LifeEqualsLove]

Yess I really do.