Guy cancels date cause he's sick?

[Anonymous]

Please please take you're time and read this and help me out...

I know this question might seem really silly and irrelevant but I really need your take on this one, cause I have major trust issues and need to know if i should let it go or not.
So i've been seeing a guy a couple of times, we hang out and we have sex, and we get a long really well so I think we both kinda like each other (although there are no feelings there yet). We were meant to hang out this weekend, I actually asked him and he said he wanted to see me, but the same morning he texts me saying he's sick and that we'll have to hang out another time. I immediately thought he's lying and that it's just an excuse not to see me? I probably wouldn't still be worried if it wasn't that it has been like 4-5 days ever since and I haven't even heard of him. We both go to uni and have a lot to do everyday, but I'd think if you're interested in a girl, you don't cancel on her cause you're "sick" and if you do at least younsuggesst another time, OR you at least text her or SOMETHING in a couple of days, but I haven't heard anything. What do you guys think? Is this a sign in lack of interest or should I just relax? Because of this I keep checking my phone all the time and I'm scared to ask him again to hang out cause im worried that he isn't interested.
Thank you xoxoxo

[Paris13]

As wise as an ol owl that I believe that I am here, dear, his Lame duck Excuse is One that You yourself became Wise to when He... Texts me saying he's sick and we'll have to hang out another time. This raised a Red Flag because you know how it goes, being you have "Major trust issues."
Of course it was fine to give him the benefit of the Doubting Thomas perhaps, for we all get sick on the spur of the moment, but when days go by with no reply, this is rude and crude with Putting you on his pay no mind list, Giving you Haunting but Helpful Hints That... He either passed away or has blown you off in his own sick way.
Forget him and move on. No matter what Excuse he could come up with, there is No excuse while he couldn't push a button on his own end, unless his fingers were bandaged or broken.
It's Guys like this loser who give Girls These 'Trust issues" and the Good Guy is the One who is left holding the Bad bag to handle the left over ill feelings.
It didn't take me long to have to Read this One.. I got the picture the Minute you Mentioned "Sick."
Good luck. xx

[apple24]

Hmmm... first thing I noticed is you have trust issues! Which means that you need to learn to trust yourself and your gut. You might even have to talk to someone about your trust issues and see if that can be solve. Second, this guys seem to like friends with benefits he probably not looking for a relationship because he busy all the time and doesn't want a relationship. I know you don't want ask him but in person you should ask him whats up! Like just ask him! If he rejects you... its time to take your losses and leave instead of wasting your time by the phone like a sad puppy... waiting for him.

[Asker]

Yea i have major trust issues that's why I need help to analysis this, cause if i do it on my own im automatically gonna think of the worst.. Yea next time (if there will be a next time lol) im gonna ask him right away just to know whats going on. Thank you!!

[apple24]

Seriously you should talk to someone... hahah look who talking right? I need thearpy myself! hahah but seriously I do! You need to see a professional to get past this trust issue unless you don't ever want trust anyone!

[becca123]

Initially I would have said he was genuinely sick, but his ghosting behavior for days after implies lack of interest. Don't text him, wait it out.

[Asker]

He said he got the flu so he might still be sick, and on top of that were busy everyday in school, but you're right. Im gonna wait like you said thanks:)

[BreatheMe19]

It could be he was really sick and just didn't get back to asking you. Wait for him to text you, don't text him.

[Asker]

Yea thats my plan but i keep checking my phone desperately its tiering lol, thanks tho x

[BreatheMe19]

Haha it happens to the best of us. Good luck :)

[Happierthanever]

I am a guy and when I go quiet on a girl it means I am not interested in her. I am never too busy to send a few texts, so if a guy disappears off the radar then it's likely that he's lost interest or he's found a new girl and is focusing on her. To me from what I have read it seems like a classic case of hang out with a girl a few times, have sex and then cut and run.

Of course I could be wrong and he could have something like the flu which can keep you in bed for over a week. I have had it once and I was so ill that I couldn't physically leave my bed for around a week.

[Asker]

Yea he said he got the flu, so that could be the case but also I do agree with what you wrote earlier! Thanks for your help!

[Anonymous]

Actions speak louder than words. He SAID he wanted to see you, but what did he actually DO? He canceled without giving you another day/time. If he really felt it for you, he would want to see you again, especially after 4-5 days. To me, his actions come across as a lack of interest.

[thewanderingme]

if I'm sick and cancel on someone I'm not going to go crazy making sure to plan something another time. I'd be focused on taking care of myself.

[Asker]

ugghhh i agree with both of you...

[Opinion Owner]

All I'm saying is that in my experience, a woman who is genuinely interested in me would never do an open-ended cancellation like that. I actually went on a date with a woman who told me she was still sick. She went on the date anyway because she didn't want to send me the wrong message.

[Anonymous]

Why don't you text him? You don't have to wait for him. If he doesn't answer or seems avoidant in your texts then he's probably not interested in anything other than fooling around with you and not labeling anything like you've been doing.

[Asker]

I'm scared to text him cause I'm scared of rejection.. That's why I need to know if this is an obvious sign that he isn't interested, or if its not a clear sign and that i can actually text him again..

[Opinion Owner]

It could be that he's not interested, but it could also be possible that he's busy (being sick, missing classes and having to make it all up in order to be caught up and ready for the next class) and forgot to text you. If he said he wanted to see you and cancelled for being sick it could be he was being truthful and something hit him hard.

[Asker]

Yea he said he a few days earlier that he was longing for the weekend and texted me really early the same morning saying he got no sleep due to his illness, alright thank you so much for your help:)

[Opinion Owner]

You're very welcome :)

[dudeman]

i would take it as a sign of a lack of interest or at least maybe he didn't know you guys were hanging out romatically and just saw you as a dude.

[Asker]

But its weird because two days earlier he said he was longing for the weekend o_o sorry im being silly im just scared of rejection

[dudeman]

maybe he really was sick. maybe call him maybe he doesn't want to bother with his problems so early on.

[Anonymous]

contact him. he may have been really sick. has he randomly cancelled before with the same excuse? if so, then I would worry about it

[Asker]

No he hasn't cancelled before actually he's always been the one asking to me hang out, i said no like 3 times before we hung out for the very first time... What worries me is that I haven't heard of him now, if I don't hear back from him in like 1,5 weeks im just gonna conclude that he's not interested.

[Opinion Owner]

stop waiting for one. 1 week isn't a big deal. after that he might even be assuming you lost interest. did you even check to see if he was feeling better a day or so after? if not, he may feel that you're uncaring and why should he continue to invest his time and energy into you anymore.

[Asker]

Na i haven't checked on him, should I? Feels kinda awkward o_o

[Opinion Owner]

I would be offended if the person I was dating never called to see if I was feeling any better.

[Anonymous]

Well, what do you want him to do? Throw up in your mouth?

[Asker]

lol noo, just suggest another time or at least text me to see how im doing, i dont know man im just confused due to all the other guys that have treated me like shit and I've been naive

[Opinion Owner]

Oh I'm sorry, yeah he could have just texted you or set up something else. You are not naive. Someone is going to like you for you if this guy is not the one.

[igfunnyboi]

May be he's really sick. Very sick.