I haven't seen him in weeks, what should I do?

I've been seeing this guy for 4 months now (if you include the 3 past weeks I haven't hung out with him! )

The first of the not hanging out weeks I couldn't hang out because I had to babysit even though he asked

The second week I had to go to a 40th Birthday party and the part of the weekend plans got canceled anyway (someones relatives didn't go away so there was no party! )

The 3rd week last week I made plans with my best friend so we went to a club together and he text me that night saying hey etc.

This weekend he didn't ask me to come out or do anything. I text him this wednesday and he didn't text back. He randomly text me today saying sorry for logging off msn. I replied and he didn't text back!

I really want to know what is going on here, there has been no arguments or anything! We were getting on well. I live a 30 min bus ride away from him so I don't get to see him during the week with school. But should I text him and ask what is going on between us? Or is that desperate? He was the one who wanted to have an official boyfriend/girlfriend relationship 2 months ago but I didn't want to.?


Thought I should mention we hang out within HIS group of friends who I get on with and are a mix of girls & guys. That's why I have NEVER suggested going out because I couldn't really say "HEY I WANNA GO OUT WITH UR GROUP OF FRIENDS, LETS GO OUT! " haha


Most Helpful Guy

  • Well to him you've spent three weeks away from him, so now its been one week of him away from you? Give it a little more time, don't rush anything. Just stay where he can contact you and hope he does. If he doesn't contact you after another week, then you should come back and update this question, but for now there's no reason to assume he's avoiding you or anything :)

    Just be patient, (i know it hurts), things'll probably become clearer


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What Guys Said 1

  • Hopefully this isn't him trying to guilt trip you for not giving him attention for 3 weeks, that would be his way of trying to put himself in a power position over you. He may want to leave you hanging and then treat you like you owe him something, some men do things like this to manipulate women, but there would be warning signs. Does he objectify you? Has he ever seemed like he was lying to you?

    In this case you wouldn't want to seem desperate, that's what he wants to see. Think of it as a test, "how does she react when I avoid her? " But, that's only one angle, it could very well be far more innocent. Maybe he just got into a groove of doing other things because you were gone so long and it will take another week or so to get back to you. Maybe he's hurt, even though he shouldn't be, he may slightly feel abandoned by you. How about not texting him, and instead calling him! Wouldn't it be nice for you guys to hear each other's voices after all this time?


What Girls Said 2

  • Um just CALL him asking if he wanted to hang out this weekend.

  • No offense, but Tbh its really on your fault why he's slipping away from you, bc he wouldn't be doing this to you if you disn't take him for granted, i mean i understand you're busy with your life but you would always find a way for someone you genuinely care, try to show him you a least care if you don't wanna lose him

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