After I meet a guy at a club and drunkenly make out with him and he calls me, what kind of "date" do we go on?

So I met this cute guy at a club. He goes to a college near mine and he bought me drinks all night and we ended up making out a little.

I usually don't give my number to randoms but he was really charming and introduced me to his friends and they all seemed really chill.

We already went through the basic small talk and we have made out already.

Where would we go out? To another night club? A bar? or like a real date? Is he going to be expecting action?

My friends told me that I need to stop leading guys on and so I agreed to go out with him, which I am happy with but I don't know what this would entail.

I am really pretty (just giving the facts, not trying to be cocky) and so I have never felt the need to actually go out with a guy before because I don't need the validation (which I have seen all my friends get into relationships over.) And in doing so I now realize that I am 20 have a great personality and I have never hooked up with the same guy 3x largely because I am trying to wait to have sex for marriage (and I get to nervous to tell the guys I am a virgin and waiting so I have never made it to date #3.) Also I have never went out with a guy that I met at a club before.

1. Where is a good place to go with him?

2. Is he going to be expecting action again?

3. When is the right time to tell someone I am waiting for marriage? (I have never met anyone else my age that is still a virgin.)

I was nervous for no reason he is a great guy, we have been dating for a month and he 100% accepts that I am waiting for marriage. Luckily he is okay with taking everything very slowly. We didn't kiss again till date #6! Thank you for the great advice.


Most Helpful Guy

  • 1. You are not going to be the one deciding where to go. He's going to be. Besides you want it that way anyways. If you are asking where HE would take you (which you probably are) then it would say it could a ton of places. There is not enough information to give you a good answer on that one. Most guys are decent guys who are not going to try and use you or hurt you in any way shape or form. Keep in mind most of us are trying our best to please you.

    2. Hoping mostly. expecting hardly.

    3. When he brings up having sex with you.

    You sound really scared, and usually women get this way about guys they meet at clubs. Usually this is the guys fault for moving too quickly sexually.

    A guys mind works like this. If we feel a boob once and you let us do it, we feel that we have crossed that line.." ok boob is a go.." which means we own that boob. Its ours.

    So when you deny that boob touch next time, we get weirded out.

    What I'm saying to you is this, if what you did at the club is fine to you, he's expecting more of the same, not more of something else too.

    Hes hoping for something else, just like you are hoping for something else. (i.e. him being a fun and great guy.)

    Poor girl, you are so nervous about this guy.

    Its funny how other women will get other girls to do stuff they really don't want to do.

    Your friends are probably right though, its never good to lead men on. Mostly because we want women to be open, honest and tell us straight.

    We prefer you say "i like you." with a smile VS. "i really hate you!" With a smile and a playful swat.


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What Guys Said 1

  • Listen to your friends #1. But as far as where to date well a walk in a park after a movie gives you time to get to know each other as people and a casual activity that everyone feels comfortable with.

    Look you are ALL about validation. Going out with a guy means he gets to know you as a person and decide whether he likes you as a person which is risky for anyone but you avoid that. Looking pretty is not risky and making out with a guy validates him so you feel validated and in control. You are not a committed virgin in waiting as demonstrated by your behviour. Your afraid of commitment or of being asked to have sex by someone who has had it before and your certainly a tease (considering your age). The guys see you 3x because they notice that about you and find you immature. Most men would. Action is not making out. Action is sex to a guy. Respect your own desires to make out and not have sex but get with it intellectually and cease being so naive here. Understand the difference or one day you will be at an age when you will discover noone is a virgin and you are still on date # 3.


What Girls Said 2

  • You have seen him in action at a bar/club so change things and go to a movie, dinner, something fun but not awkward and see if he's different not around his friends and at a bar. If he's a good guy, like you deserve, he will respect and like you so much more when you tell him ur a virgin. go to a place where sex isn't an option, not to a place like his house "to watch a movie."

  • I think you guys should go out on a real date and see if you like him or not...if so...the second date be upfront with him and tell him you're a virgin. Since you made out with him, he will be expecting action because you kissed him and gave him you're number and in a guys head he figures if you kissed him on the 1st date = sex on the second be prepared.

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