Is it bad to sleep with a guy on the first night?

[Broken4201]

I met this guy through my girlfriend on her b day. He was very cute but I just got out of a bad relationship. Well we were in the limo and when he got dropped off he invited me to his house and it happened. Well then in the morning it happened again ( twice ).

well needless to say I like the guy but I don't know what to say to him and if I should try to start anything with him?

I hate bugging my friend about it because I think she is getting annoyed. It is her boyfriends friend and she has known him for years. Now what I want to know is how do I talk to him without being too forward? Does he think I am a skeez because I gave it up on the first night? I don't know what to do? Please any advice will help. Should I play it by ear and let him come to me?

[xxLovely]

Guys can be hypocrites, they'll always try for sex, but if you give it up too easily, then you're "easy" and deemed date-able, because "for all they know, you could give it up that easily to any guy" Which I can see their point, but it's f***ed up nonetheless. okay, so this guy. you guys hooked up, and now you realize you've got some intense feelings for this guy. here's the thing, guys and way different from girls. guys can have sex and it means nothing, no emotional attachment necessary. girls are a bit different, when we have sex, it's unconsciously a bonding experience, and we're being vulnerable. maybe if WE f***ed THEM, it would be the other way around.

anyway, I think you should wait to see him in person to unveil the feelings. if you try to get his number and text/call him like "hey this is the girl you hooked up with, I like you" it's an iffy situation, because he could not be a big texter, and if you don't hear a reply you're automatically discouraged. wait until he's in town next week. if he really wants to talk to you, he'll tell his best friend. who'll more than likely tell his girlfriend if she asks nonchalantly, and it'll come back to you. if by chance no word of him shows up, don't worry. if you're willing to invest in this guy, just wait a bit, do your own thing, and contact him sometime not-so-soon not-too-long with something like 'hey, what's new? you me and *yourbestfriend*hisbestfriend* should hang out this weekend' leave the door open and wait for him to reply

[Broken4201]

Good advise...thank you. That's a great idea. I will just wait.

[katiesmuff]

Don't be bashful with thls guy. You call him! Tell him the sex was great and wondered if he would like some more himself.

[Anonymous]

yeah it is. if you care what a guy thinks of you make him wait for it

[ilovelegs]

I think you should play it by ear rather than trying to talk to him. Don't ignore him but if you had sex 3 time the first night you met him he pretty much know whether you're a keeper or not. Riding the fast lane isn't the greatest thing to do because he might blab it all over rather than come looking for you. Not good for one's reputation or self-esteem. I'd say you'll end up just being a booty call but maybe that's ok with you. It doesn't hurt to try starting something with him if you really like him already. Do you even know much about him yet? He might be a real loser and then he might not. If I were you, I'd make an attempt to contact him if you don't hear from him by several days after that fun or unfortunate night, however you want to look at it. Maybe that will work for you and yet it might not. At lease you will have tried and there's no telling if he might just suddenly call you later on. .

[Thorzilla]

Why do you care what other people think? If you felt it was right, then f*** it, it was right. If you feel like catching up with him again, then just hit him up.

[Anonymous]

hate to say it hottie, but when you sleep with a guy the first nite, that's ALL he will think about, because our rationale is that if you slept with me the first nite, why wouldn't you do the same to another guy? just means there will never be respect for you regardless of what he says, and you will only be fwb.sorry. just learn from it and don't do it again

[captheman]

I think you should realize you both have feelings for each other. are you two falling in love fast maybe?

[Broken4201]

But I'm not sure if he feels the same way. How do I find out if he likes me or not???

[captheman]

Tell him that you like him a lot. Look and listen to how he responds. You can tell by what he says and whether or not he would look deeply into your eyes. Be careful and make sure you are not being used, because that would be terrible.

[Broken4201]

Im scared to tell him I like him.... I only met him one night and he works out of town for the week and he hasn't made an effort to call me or anything. So if I say that to him I think he will just be like...ok.....thats nice. and then never talk to me again.

[captheman]

Well he has to have some feelings for you. you two did have sex. I believe that two people cannot have sex without having feelings for each other. I really hope for your sake that this guy is not a creep because I can tell you are not the type who just does not give yourself away and not mean anything by it. you need to be honest with him, and if he says that at least you found out fast how he really is and you can save yourself for the best man in your life.

[captheman]

I'm sorry I am probably giving bad advice :( I don't know too much, I can't even find a girl lol

[Broken4201]

No its great advise. Thank you. I just don't know if I am ready to tell him that I like him. It hasn't even been a week. I don't want to leave things weird ...you know what I mean. I just wish that he would call me and ask me what's up or something.... lol Thank you...

[captheman]

How many times have you had sex

[captheman]

He has to like you, or he would not have wanted that with you

[Broken4201]

We only slept together the one time. But we did it like 3 times.

[captheman]

See I could never have sex with a girl unless I have feelings for her

[Jarett]

I agree 100% with lovely. If you give it up to a guy on the first night, he knows he's not that special, and thinks that you will give it up to many guys on the first night. So you pretty much shot yourself in the foot, because I would have less respect for a girl who tries to sleep with me on the first night. I wouldn't do anything wtih a girl on the first night. To be honest, there's a very good chance that it's over.