My mom caught me and my boyfriend kissing/making out?

[Anonymous]

We were in his car, outside of my house. And my mom caught us kissing (french style). Anyways she got mad... He is my first boyfriend and I'm 20. She got mad at me and told me to not kiss him that way, she is afraid i'll end up pregnant and ik Im aware of that.

Anyways, I understand that I didn't respect her and her house by kissing in front of her house but what i don't get, is that was i not supposed to be kisisng him? Like I don't know what she expects me to do. To not kiss him at all? I understand she is scared I'll end up pregnant but to get mad at me for kissing my boyfriend...

Updates

+1 y

He was also kissing my neck. But again. If we can't do that at my house or outside of my house and not in public places than where?

My boyfriend and I are virgins and even tho yes, we talk about it we mostly talk about how to stay safe doing it. Anyways we been dating for 8 months now. My mom didn't say it, but she hinted that i should 'end it' with my boyfriend and be with others, to not just let this one be my only relationship... But I get what she says... But I'm confused too.

Updates

+1 y

where are u supposed to have privacy if i can't kiss him inside his car? Do I need to snuck out just to kiss my bf? I understand she is scared and felt disrespected but what should i do?

[Walrus_au]

If someone finds displays of love and affection 'disrespectful' then they are in the wrong. You cannot get pregnant from kissing someone (even french style, even if you manage to taste his lunch) there is nothing disrespectful about love.

What's more, you are 20, able to make your own decisions. Your mother trying to run your life is being VERY disrespectful to you and your judgement and decisions. Very confusing since I am sure she taught you how to form your judgements.

It sounds like your home situation is very controlling and unhealthy, I hope you are able to make it better soon.

[Asker]

hopefully, because now I feel like the only way I can kiss him is if we sneak out or we kiss in a remote area...

[Walrus_au]

And just how disrespectful is it to you to make your home a place where you cannot show affection for someone you love?

I'm sorry you're having to go through this.

[Asker]

Thank u, I just feel so confused on how should I kiss or show affection to my boyfriend. If everything is a no no for her

[Walrus_au]

She needs to come to terms with the fact that your life belongs to you, it is not hers to control.

[Asker]

I don't see that happening...

[Walrus_au]

That doesn't sound healthy

[Asker]

She says she doesn't want to control my life but I feel confused and trap...

[Asker]

Now my parents talk about me and my boyfriend like he will leave me once i get pregnant and speak low of him and me. I understand that my mom didn't like seeing us making out but we were just kissing it never went past that. Anyways my boyfriend is not a fuckboy, who only cares for sex. We been dating for almost a year. And it annoys me that now because we kiss they speak low of my boyfriend. Advice how do i talk to her about it? Because she keeps saying that I should date other guys, that I shouldn't let this relationship be my last even tho my boyfriend and i are still strong. And she mentions because my boyfrienf and i are from different culture we would never truly understand each other. Is killing me. How do I make them understand. Because my boyfriend truly is an amazing man, he is not a low man how my parents view him only because we kiss. Advice on making them understand that he isn't a bad person

[Walrus_au]

Sadly, it may not matter what you say. Some folks are entirely closed minded to anything that doesn't fit their particular view of things.

It is possible they have some valid point, I'm not suggesting they are right or that you should abandon the relationship - just that you shouldn't reject whatever they say just because they are over-reacting or ignoring what you say. Cultural differences can be tricky.

That said - you know the guy, you would be the best placed to get a read on the relationship. And cultural differences need not dictate problems in a relationship.

It sounds like a serious boundary violation. Pushing back will probably cause fights, but if your relationships with your parents is to be healthy, boundaries need to be respected.

[MadeInAmerica]

She should count her blessing she didn't catch you fucking. Overly strict parents she shouldn't even be worrying about that and second your girlfriend and boyfriend what else are you going to do, just stare at each other.

[Asker]

Ik, she made me feel horrible for kissing him... I don't know what she expects me to do. She is traditional and Ik she is scared of end up pregnant but if I can't kiss him inside his car then where? Should i sneak out just to kiss him?

[Asker]

Now my parents talk about me and my boyfriend like he will leave me once i get pregnant and speak low of him and me. I understand that my mom didn't like seeing us making out but we were just kissing it never went past that. Anyways my boyfriend is not a fuckboy, who only cares for sex. We been dating for almost a year. And it annoys me that now because we kiss they speak low of my boyfriend. Advice how do i talk to her about it? Because she keeps saying that I should date other guys, that I shouldn't let this relationship be my last even tho my boyfriend and i are still strong. And she mentions because my boyfrienf and i are from different culture we would never truly understand each other. Is killing me. How do I make them understand. Because my boyfriend truly is an amazing man, he is not a low man how my parents view him only because we kiss. Advice on making them understand that he isn't a bad person

[MadeInAmerica]

Your parents seem stubborn and stuck in their beliefs. I think the best thing you can do is ignore whatever negativity they send your way and just stick by your boyfriend. The longer you are with him and not pregnant maybe they will ease up as they see your in it for the long run. If your parents are unwilling to spend time with you and your boyfriend so they can get to know him and if you tell them no matter what you are going to stay with him because he treats you right then there isn't much you can do. Your parents suck haha when it comes to acceptance of another culture.

[Anonymous]

If u are 20 she needs to get ober it your an adult nothing she can do

[Asker]

Yea... I don't know what she wants me to do? To just small kiss him? And where? Ik i can't inside the house, outside but not even her car? She is more traditional... I get she is afraid I'll end up pregnant. She talk about herself like she never kissed or had felt making out with her bfs... She said she felt disappointed in me...

[Asker]

Now my parents talk about me and my boyfriend like he will leave me once i get pregnant and speak low of him and me. I understand that my mom didn't like seeing us making out but we were just kissing it never went past that. Anyways my boyfriend is not a fuckboy, who only cares for sex. We been dating for almost a year. And it annoys me that now because we kiss they speak low of my boyfriend. Advice how do i talk to her about it? Because she keeps saying that I should date other guys, that I shouldn't let this relationship be my last even tho my boyfriend and i are still strong. And she mentions because my boyfrienf and i are from different culture we would never truly understand each other. Is killing me. How do I make them understand. Because my boyfriend truly is an amazing man, he is not a low man how my parents view him only because we kiss. Advice on making them understand that he isn't a bad person

[hazfire]

Your mother is too strict. The tighter the leash the further they run. You can park somewhere and make out, just don't retaliate and mess up if you know what I mean.

[Asker]

Yea Ik what u mean... I can't wait to have my own place, like was us kissing in front of her house, inside his car really that disrespectful?

[hazfire]

It's not. Some mothers are just like that. Just take it easy while you are there so not to make the living situation uncomfortable with her, then when you have your own place you can do what ever you wish.

[Asker]

Now my parents talk about me and my boyfriend like he will leave me once i get pregnant and speak low of him and me. I understand that my mom didn't like seeing us making out but we were just kissing it never went past that. Anyways my boyfriend is not a fuckboy, who only cares for sex. We been dating for almost a year. And it annoys me that now because we kiss they speak low of my boyfriend. Advice how do i talk to her about it? Because she keeps saying that I should date other guys, that I shouldn't let this relationship be my last even tho my boyfriend and i are still strong. And she mentions because my boyfrienf and i are from different culture we would never truly understand each other. Is killing me. How do I make them understand. Because my boyfriend truly is an amazing man, he is not a low man how my parents view him only because we kiss. Advice on making them understand that he isn't a bad person

[MrSociopath]

Tell her it's none of her business. Besides, kissing isn't going to get you pregnant.

[Asker]

Now my parents talk about me and my boyfriend like he will leave me once i get pregnant and speak low of him and me. I understand that my mom didn't like seeing us making out but we were just kissing it never went past that. Anyways my boyfriend is not a fuckboy, who only cares for sex. We been dating for almost a year. And it annoys me that now because we kiss they speak low of my boyfriend. Advice how do i talk to her about it? Because she keeps saying that I should date other guys, that I shouldn't let this relationship be my last even tho my boyfriend and i are still strong. And she mentions because my boyfrienf and i are from different culture we would never truly understand each other. Is killing me. How do I make them understand. Because my boyfriend truly is an amazing man, he is not a low man how my parents view him only because we kiss. Advice on making them understand that he isn't a bad person

[Miguel111]

You need to break free

[Asker]

Now my parents talk about me and my boyfriend like he will leave me once i get pregnant and speak low of him and me. I understand that my mom didn't like seeing us making out but we were just kissing it never went past that. Anyways my boyfriend is not a fuckboy, who only cares for sex. We been dating for almost a year. And it annoys me that now because we kiss they speak low of my boyfriend. Advice how do i talk to her about it? Because she keeps saying that I should date other guys, that I shouldn't let this relationship be my last even tho my boyfriend and i are still strong. And she mentions because my boyfrienf and i are from different culture we would never truly understand each other. Is killing me. How do I make them understand. Because my boyfriend truly is an amazing man, he is not a low man how my parents view him only because we kiss. Advice on making them understand that he isn't a bad person

[Nice222]

You are old enough to make those decisions.

[Asker]

Now my parents talk about me and my boyfriend like he will leave me once i get pregnant and speak low of him and me. I understand that my mom didn't like seeing us making out but we were just kissing it never went past that. Anyways my boyfriend is not a fuckboy, who only cares for sex. We been dating for almost a year. And it annoys me that now because we kiss they speak low of my boyfriend. Advice how do i talk to her about it? Because she keeps saying that I should date other guys, that I shouldn't let this relationship be my last even tho my boyfriend and i are still strong. And she mentions because my boyfrienf and i are from different culture we would never truly understand each other. Is killing me. How do I make them understand. Because my boyfriend truly is an amazing man, he is not a low man how my parents view him only because we kiss. Advice on making them understand that he isn't a bad person

[Nice222]

Just stay with him if you are happy. Eventually they will see he treats you good and is a good man.

[Rycer]

If you are 20 then you are mature enough to know.

[Anonymous]

Your 20... Why is this even an issue?

[Asker]

She is traditional and a bit strict in a way

[Opinion Owner]

Well, then that is the price you pay for living with her. Can't you go to his house/room? If your mom has such ridiculous issues, why not just go somewhere else? Or find out why she's being so unreasonable.

[Asker]

She's afraid i'll end up pregnant. And I thought we can kiss as long as we were in his car but i guess not. We do kiss in his room but I guess when we go on dates we should kiss there too in a parking lot or something... I just dont understand what she wants me to do... I feel like i need to sneak out just to kiss him

[Asker]

Now my parents talk about me and my boyfriend like he will leave me once i get pregnant and speak low of him and me. I understand that my mom didn't like seeing us making out but we were just kissing it never went past that. Anyways my boyfriend is not a fuckboy, who only cares for sex. We been dating for almost a year. And it annoys me that now because we kiss they speak low of my boyfriend. Advice how do i talk to her about it? Because she keeps saying that I should date other guys, that I shouldn't let this relationship be my last even tho my boyfriend and i are still strong. And she mentions because my boyfrienf and i are from different culture we would never truly understand each other. Is killing me. How do I make them understand. Because my boyfriend truly is an amazing man, he is not a low man how my parents view him only because we kiss. Advice on making them understand that he isn't a bad person

[Anonymous]

You should do what your mom says

[Liska98stad]

Motels lol