Girls, how can a guy know whether you want a good night kiss at the end of the first date?

[Anonymous]

Every first date good night kiss is not THIS passionate!

I know that some people expect to have sex on a first date but that is not what most of us expect. At the opposite extreme, some people want a first date to be in the middle of the day, coffee shop, sitting across from each other, thirty minute maximum, first names only, no holding hands, obviously no goodbye kiss, etc.

Most of us are somewhere in between those two extremes. Not always but sometimes. . . a guy wants to end a first date with a kiss. We sit there wondering "does she want a goodnight kiss? If I try to kiss her and she doesn't want it, will she be disappointed and refuse a second date? If I hold back and don't give her a kiss and she actually wants a good night kiss, will she think I'm homosexual?" Yes, these are the thoughts many of us have and the quandary in which we find ourselves. So. . .

How can we know? If you answer is that we should simply ask, how should we ask? If we just lean in for a kiss without asking, is that okay?

[btbc92]

There is no way of knowing. It's HER responsibility to make it known verbally or else she can get upset all she wants, it's not your fault if you don't do it. First of all, her thoughts are her thoughts. If she has to judge you because you won't make a move to do anything, then that is not somebody you want to tingle with. I would not assume anything like that about that person. It's all about who you're with. Never assume all women are the same. Ask like your asking about this here. The problem with a lot of you people, you don't inquire and then complain when it doesn't go your way or their way. This is not something you shouldn't have to worry about. It should be our job to let you know what we want. Men aren't mind readers, and I've learned that.

[Anonymous]

Usually if I'm close to him than usual. My lips will part a little bit and I'll look down at his lips. 🤷‍♀️

[Anonymous]

I'd say if it is a first meeting in a casual setting coffee house a hug if she doesn't resist. If you feel she is ok with it maybe a peck on the cheek. Personally I'm not much into PDA even when I'm close to someone. Like to keep it private.

With meeting people on apps it is a bit different than meeting them in person, having sort of conversation then setting up a date. One can always ask if in doubt. I'd say if things went well on the first meeting or date and the second date went well kissing is appropriate. Since I'm not a third date means sex person I think a steady increase in physical activity is a good ides.

For me I don't have a problem with a man who wants to move faster than me. I have a problem if I tell him I take it slow and either he tries to be manipulative or he gets mad about. Attractions can immediate but I need some feeling behind it.

Now all things I said are void if the woman wants to go from 0 to 100 on the first date and if this is true I'm sure she will convey that.

I guess women could take more of an initiative and either verbalize they are ok or lean in for the kiss. Then there could be a catch 22 for the woman in that she could be viewed as aggressive or taking the lead. The thing is if a woman feels it she should be able to act on it as much as a man.

[Opinion Owner]

Side note: I gave a side hug goodbye to a man at the end up a meetup. I mean a meetup that was organized. He was the only who showed up for a movie. I ended up getting messaged back on the app by the next day. He was too young so I let that one fade away. I didn't come from a huggy family. It was something I had to get comfortable with as an adult.

[Anonymous]

Obviously if you ask her out she won’t think your gay lmao. But, most people don’t want a kiss after the first date and if they do they’ll either wait or kiss you instead. It really is not that big of a deal and that coming from me, a big time worrier 😂

[SarahsSummer]

If I want one, I usually help him by standing very close, looking up at him with widened eyes and a big smile. If not, I give a quick hug (or not) and make a quick exit.

[Gray42]

With my current boyfriend, I honestly didn't know if I wanted a kiss goodnight after our first date until he gave me one on my cheek first and I realized just how comfortable I was with him

[Good1mufferaw]

Just ask the girl “can i give you a kiss?” It shows that you take her into consideration before making your decision...

Or you could say something like “i really feel like kissing you right now” she will either kiss you, or not.

Either way, if she doesn’t want to kiss you, never take it personally, it has nothing to do with you, but all about her and who she finds attractive..

Just don’t get mad at her if she rejects you, she has every right to say no

[lexiepotter]

I wouldn't like a kiss on the first date unless it's someone I've known and trusted to an extent for a while

[Anonymous]

I would say a kiss on the cheek... but I'm autistic so that maybe doesn't apply to her but I'd be really uncomfortable if someone did that

[Opinion Owner]

And then maybe try for a normal kiss if she's ok with the first

[taleets]

If she leans in and seems genuinely interested.

[abcdefgahehe]

Apply lipgloss during dinner. He’ll know

[Asker]

Actually, I think most guys would miss that hint.

[abcdefgahehe]

Do it at the table

[Asker]

Most guys will still miss that hint! Most guys will assume that you are simply a little bit OCD about your makeup.

[Blue_bunni]

By reading our mind!

[Asker]

And when we try and fail, we will hear you say, "WTF? Do you think you're a mind reader?"

[Blue_bunni]

Don’t fail then

[Asker]

The Battle Between The Sexes has not changed since I was a young man!

[Blue_bunni]

Nature has always been more favorable to the winners

[Asker]

And, sometimes, winning is simply a matter of good fortune!