In principle I speak in general not personally. The worst thing of all is that reading online comments, from women not from weird pages, creates more insecurities than the other way around, then people are surprised that there are disturbed people or so many problems. Women receive better support: for example if a woman makes a post asking "if it's okay for a woman to have vaginismus"? 90% of men will say yes, they would accept not having piv sex, or with height, its OK for women to be tall, short, etc.
Whenever people talk about this, they call incel and terrible things, being a man is horrible, it is not enough to be handsome, there is the height, penis size, dominant personality, do the approaching... I don't think women will stand the pressure of being a man, for example a man can't have thousands of suitors or easy matches or date up, or hookup with a celebrity, any average teen girl can be a groupie, look at any band or singer... it is very sad to be a man, the amount of standards women have is brutal and growing
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+1 y
I understand some of the answers but also women are also obsessed with height and the man who is taller, so why should a man spend money and time if he is going to be rejected because of his height? Women don't suffer from that, if a woman is hot, she is hot, men are not insecure about dating women taller than them. Male celebrities, and not only short ones but very tall like David Bowie or Mick Jagger, have dated women even taller than them.
Girls, Why don't people empathize with how complicated the standards of male beauty are, or how men have it harder?
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You’re right, there’s no way in hell I could live a man’s life, and I can see where you guys have it a lot worse in the dating/mating field.
That’s why when I meet a man who doesn’t let any of those things stop him and is happy and confident in who he is, I automatically respect him more and am willing to be a real woman to him.
Maybe because men aren't vocal about it and many times when they try to be, they get shutdown by other men. Whereas women are very vocal and we kinda support each and validate the things we go through. With y'all we don't know if you guys are joking or just saying it to get back at women
Women have their own problems and you have yours. Mostly it's just in our heads. You're saying you find it hard to be a man because of "height, penis size, dominant personality, do the approaching" while most women say "fit body, boob size, feminine enough, do the cooking, have children (younger than it is considered normal for a man) etc" but at the end it's all in your head, and in those woman's heads. For each thing you listed here is the reality- There are short guys who have a happy marriage/ relationship (my godfather is one, he is one of my favourite men in the world and I think he deserves his happy marriage and 3 children "even though" he is chubby and short, and I also think despite that he is a handsome man). Penis size is a myth created probably because women feel pressured to have big boobs and ass so this is their standard to match with men's standard of woman's bodies. In reality, most women don't care, as most men also love smaller breasts, and a serious relationship/ partner will not fail/leave you because of your penis size. You just have to have good passionate meaningful sex. Next, dominant personality, well personality is because opposites attract hence why men want a feminine personality, but as with everything, there is the stereotype, which is that, and there is the reality, which is that there are men who have a submissive personality and women who have dominant and once they find each other, which is 100% possible they can have a blooming relationship. Next, do the approaching. Hm... My opinion on this is that it's expected of a man today because everyone's expectation is that dating begins with meeting a stranger, more specifically a guy approaching a girl at a club or even worse texting her first, but the old fashioned way is that you get to know her trough a mutual friend, or she is already your friend and you develop feelings, and even though you should ask first probably, both of you will give the same effort even in the begining of dating because you know you feel the same/ similar way about each other and it's simply time to take things further. This is no longer happening due to new age, online dating, lust based relationships, but if you really want it can happen and making the first move would not be as stressful when it's not a stranger but someone you know at least from the talk of your friends/family/community, and even better someone you already know has an interest in you. Now, it is still hard to be a man, as it is hard to be a woman, but there are wonderful things both genders can enjoy in their different ways. Try to relax and don't focus so much on stereotypes and fitting in, stressing out that you are different, telling yourself this is how it is with no exceptions... Be realistic and open minded. World, life, love, is much deeper and more meaningful and more important than dick size, height, having one personality type that random media is pushing as the ideal... etc
I read your update. You didn't listen to anything I wrote and I am free to say I think my reply was the most helpful of all because what I wrote is all true, with evidence from my own life and that can be seen in every day life, while other girls either went the opposite direction "no women have it harder" or said "yes true I agree with you and it's because men aren't vocal, but I love him when he is happy even dispite everything you wrote" I actually tried to be helpful and addressed every point you made. And now with this update you added I can see it all went down the drain. 1. You said why should I waste time and money if she will pick the taller guy. Well don't go into the dating world as I said especially not this modern new age joke of a dating world with a complete stranger and an expectation they will become love of your life and you theirs in a few months. Go with someone you know, she knows you, and you know there are feelings for one another. Only then will you not lose to "the tall guy" because if she knows you, if she isn't a stranger, she knows all of you, your height your looks, your likes dislikes, personality, while a hot stranger may be hot but she WILL ONLY LOVE YOU for superficial reasons such as height and looks since she doesn't know anything else, let alone have feelings for anything else concerning you.
2. You are not listening to my advice to focus on the real world and reality, you are looking at celebrities and stereotypes. Yes tall male celebrities will date the tall hot female celebrities but that's not the real world, nor is it a reality that women only care about looks and height and if you don't have them you are forever doomed and should just die alone. NO. Why does my godfather have 3 children and the happiest marriage in my circle then, when he is chubby and short? m? Yes, there are women who only care about that, and the media also focuses on that which doesn't make it any easier, but THE REAL LIFE is different. No where is it written that looks and height are the only standard and only way you can have a happy love life. There I addressed your update too. I lost a little bit of respect because of it, and because you obviously didn't take 1% of my advice, but I tried to help again... If you don't get it in your head that you CAN find love and that these superficial stereotypes are simply not worth worrying over your whole youth, you will be happier and will not longer need to ask questions like this. You will need to take some time to change the way you think, which is normal, the media and all does have the goal for everyone to be insecure like you, I used to be, millions of people are, but go through the phase of realizing that you are much better than that and that life can be greater than that. If you don't, you will continue to sound like a whining child all your twenties and all your life. You are too young to let your mind worry and think this way. THAT IS NOT THE REALITY THAT IS WHAT THE MEDIA WANTS YOU THINK AND YOU NEED TO SNAP OUT OF IT. On the other hand, I'm not trying to dismiss any male problems, I'm just telling you that there are solutions and that this is it. It start with you changing the way you see the world and people and life. It's not as bad as you think.
Thank you for your answers, you're quite right, but I was speaking on a superficial level, in terms of appearance. If a short man can be sexually attractive or not, removing the factor personality, relationship, etc if he can attract women.
The way my parents taught me, a high value woman will get a high value man, and vice versa. So I was encouraged to do my best in school, emphasise my natural beauty, and maintain a fit body because finding the best possible mate, it's not the meaning of life, but it's a huge part of life.
Yes I have high standards. That standard is I expect you to look after yourself and approach your life in a meaningful way. I don't find a man who traipses through life attractive, I just don't.
Yes, I know it's not easy, but my advice to a girlfriend who eats way too much is the same as I have for a guy who has a relationship with his television: you don't have to try if you don't want to. That's key. If you are satisfied with less, then why try so hard right? But if you want to date a girl who has a masters degree and looks like a victoria secret model... you better be either a handsome corporate financier, elite football player, computer scientist or law firm owner. That's life, you get what you work for.
Although I will say, to me this question seems to be provoked... were you insulted? If so please ignore. It's only a very small number of cowardly girls who randomly call guys creeps, retards and incels over the internet. That's because they're probably salty about something else... don't stoop to their level, don't let it offend you. Some girls post in their bio that 6ft, 6in, 7fig stupid thing. Yes, it's the most obnoxious and desperate thing I've ever seen. Even though... sure I agree that would be quite nice, it's tactless and tasteless to broadcast it. Those same girls that post that would get offended if a guy posted the specific body measurements he would like so. So ignore those immature girls and just continue working on yourself.
But «A masters degree and looks like a victoria secret model...» is not equal to« either a handsome corporate financier, elite football player, computer scientist or law firm owner. That's life, you get what you work for.» A master degree is equal to athe master degree, you put more status in the man.
The standards for men are pretty mediocre in my opinion. The standards for women are so high, that they’re pretty much unobtainable for most people without the help of makeup, plastic surgery, wigs/extensions, shape wear, and more. In the looks department I feel as though women try twice as hard as men. Women literally rip off their eyebrows and draw them back on. We walk around in painful high heels. We wear waist trainers and spanx that suck in our entire torso. We spend time mastering makeup techniques and hairstyles. Do you know how much all of that costs? Generally the standards for men are having an average body, with an average looking face, with well kept hair, and dress in average looking clothes. Women try really fucking hard. If you want to look better, then try harder.
«The standards for men are pretty mediocre in my opinion.» one of the most important attribute to be attractive is being taller than a women: How can a man change his height? And what tha hell do you talk about average and not trying, do you jnow for men how hard is to develop a muscular body in the gym?
Most average sized men are capable of getting a date. It’s unfortunate that shorter men are typically less desired, but even they are capable of getting a date if they have other positive traits.
I don't think men have it harder, I think beauty standards for both genders are crazy. Both are told by the media that they should have unachievable body types for the average person, now I do believe the standards for women are worse as it's impossible to meet them with plastic surgery for 99% of women. Like you said above though the average person doesn't hold these media set standards when they're dating, for example, dad bods are considered hot by soo many women.
And about body types, I think women have it easier, compare the body of female superheroes, which is very average and normal, with male superheroes who have a muscular body that is often impossible without some diet, training and steroids.
It shows how naive you are to say the female body types shown in media are normal, as I said most cannot be achieved without surgery or photoshop. Believe it or not, most women aren't a size 0 with a tiny waist DDs a massive ass and between 5'6 - 5'9. Makeup doesn't change anything real and women are shamed for wearing or not wearing it female body image perceptions are more unrealistic as it would actually take going under the knife multiple times to achieve it even then you might not.
You seem very caught up on height here which is the only proper thing men deal with when it comes to body image as no one cares about men being muscular (This idea that's in the media is more based around a man's fantasy of strength and dominance than a woman's of the perfect man) Both genders deal with issues about height men are expected to be tall women short, most people don't really care as long as their man's taller/their woman smaller, and even then many people still date people outside of their type.
beauty standards r bad for everyone. Just that society directly targets women cause stereotype for being beauty>brains. For males society indirectly targets men (buff models, certain hair, certain clothing etc but don't really say "have ["flaw"]? then get this [product], it'll make u beautiful" like it does for women. )
You either got it or you don’t 🤷🏼♀️ you sound like you don’t. Just try harder to make yourself more attractive
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
Because women have their own standards they have to live up to and our own problems to deal with... and honestly most women aren't going to be interested in a man that whines about how hard life is for men all the time.
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Anonymous
(Under 18)
+1 y
Men have it harder? 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂ok bet.
Double standards? No we both have standards. It is what it is.
Men don’t have it harder. Women have it harder Ans you know it. The time and money that women spend to buy makeup, fashion, lose weight , workout to keep those curves is uncomparable to men’s
Its not true many men todayhave spent a oot of money and timepower in the gym, some men pay between 10.000K to 100.000 to the leg lengthening surgery to add some inches, some men are starting with penis surgery too. Men fashion is expensive too.
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