Is 5 months too soon to get engaged?

[Anonymous]

[CallMeDave]

I think it's early. You might think you know the other person well, but at 5 months you're likely still in the "honeymoon phase" of the relationship where you basically only see the good and not the potential problems. I've had several relationships that were still good at 5 months but ended by a year or 18 months after one or both of us starting seeing things that we hadn't noticed before that made a long term relationship unlikely to be good.

Marriage is a major commitment and in most places is very stressful, time consuming and expensive to undo, so I think it's wise to be sure you know the person really well. I don't really think that's possible by 5 months. It takes more time than that to live through various experiences and stresses and some conflict in order to see how well you handle all those things because they will happen again - probably many times - during your life together.

Personally, I think the minimum amount of time before marriage should be three years, with at least a year of living together (so that you see how well you handle daily life together and sharing a home and dividing up chores and things like that). For engagement (which isn't as difficult to undo if you end up realizing you don't really belong together), I'd say maybe about 2 years.

Of course it's possible to get engaged at 5 months and go on to be happy together for life. My parents got MARRIED less than 4 months after the first date (and no she wasn't pregnant) and were together "until death do you part" decades later. I know other couples also that got engaged and married pretty quickly and had it work out. So it's certainly possible that things can go well after an early engagement/marriage. I just think the odds of there being relationship-ending issues you hadn't noticed before are much higher at 5 months than at 2 or 3 years so it's safer to wait until you've had more time to really get to know each other. It could save a lot of headaches and there's not really a downside because you can still do just as much together if you're dating but not engaged as you can if you're engaged.

[ririissleepy]

Not if he is the one. My parents got engaged after 1 month of knlwing eachother. They have been married for 23 years.

[GermanGuy87]

not if you are in love

[_shivammmmmm]

No it's more then enough to know a person

[CreatingWorlds]

Better than Romeo and Juliet