Have your dating preferences changed with time?

Question

So my fellow beautiful friends, I’ve been talking to other people about how time changed us especially in the dating market. It had me thinking to ask you wonderful people.

Now I’ve definitely noticed a changed opposed to even 5 years ago. I noticed my future girlfriend must have healthier lifestyle goals, potential career, open mindedness to children, intellectually curiosity, compassion and confidence, etc etc.

So now , has it changed or stayed the same? And why?

Have your dating preferences changed with time?

slackbabbath · Accepted Answer

Ohh yes. LOL. When I was 18-23 I dated sooo many guys that were not dating material. They were all broken, had no money (lived in run down apartments or basements) and were so lost and didn’t know how to respect women or have a relationship. I think I had wanted to change them or be the positive in their lives (which I now see isn’t my problem to deal with!) I dated a few drug addicts, musicians or just completely unhinged men who didn’t offer me love, just drama. I gave and gave and it was depleting after awhile. I’ve matured a lot after my last relationship. I’m now 26 and I no longer date anyone on drugs, whose main career is a musician (sorry) or overly emotional or negative men. And career does matter now. I realized money does impact a relationship more than my younger self wished to admit. I make good money so I need my man to too. There are ways I’ve matured but I can still see there are some old patterns I still have. I still put my love for someone over the love they’ve given me. I hope in time to better that too. I always give more than I receive. Receiving love freaks me out so I’m working on it. Seeing my progress I’m hopeful.

Minx7282 · Accepted Answer

Yes it has changed as my self esteem and respect has changed. I used to go for guys who less attractive as I thought I could fix them or think that being with me would change things and that they'd value me. I spent 2 years of my life with someone who I realised never valued me or stuck to his promise to marry me.
I have a lot to offer in a relationship so now I look for someone who can lead and has good goals in life. So i can align and build with them. But also someone who will be protective and loving towards me and my son and not controlling. I don't let people treat me like shit anymore and get away with it. I have a 3 point strike system straight away with dating people. If you breach my boundaries 3 times and you know it I'm out. I dont care how long I've had history with someone. If you disrespect my boundaries that's it. Soemtimes it's a mistake and had no idea and change that's different. But if you think I'm going to be a door matt you have another thing coming. Waisted too much time already on people who don't deserve my time and effort

coachTanthony · Accepted Answer

---------My preferences have changed over the years. When you travel for most of your life it is difficult to find someone who is willing to put up with that lifestyle. It's not impossible but just difficult. I plan on traveling again soon for most of the year and most likely will be also looking for someone who can travel as well. Preferences change. Embrace them and follow your heart.

"Everyone should be kissed and often and by someone who knows how."
~Coach T Anthony @thedatecoach IG

NYCQuestions1976 · Accepted Answer

Yes definitely. Since my divorce, I'm focused on raising my son, and any adult R-rated or X-rated fun with any women is behind the scenes. I'm not saying I'm completely against putting myself in a serious relationship again, but it's not my focus. Whatever happens, happens, and I'm just going to enjoy myself whenever it's possible.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes of course!!! The first guy I was interested in was a good white guy. He literally had nothing going for him. Not in school, part time job, lived in his parents basement, addicted to drugs, no car he simply didn’t care about life. The next guy I actually dated from my school. White guy, a jock, funny but way hyper sexual God. We dated for about 6 months and when he changed schools I decided to break up with him it was all the way in NJ and I had no way to get there. He played lacrosse, walked me to class, really sweet but used to be a fboy so in the relationship his ex was really rude to at school. He actually asked me out. Not my type anymore. Then my most recent was a Hispanic hood guy, drug dealer, really really sweet, a bit clueless to me but I could tell he gives that vibe off to find out people’s true intentions so he was actually pretty attentive, a bit petty/childish, kinda made me take the reigns in the relationship, changed numbers ALL THE TIME (we ended up being pushed apart bc of this. He would give his number to me at work but he was fired and I don’t have his new number 😑), inconsistent, kinda quiet, VERY possessive, and handsome ASFFFF y’all he was SO CUTE. I didn’t think I could pull him in the beginning but apparently he thought the same thing about me and we pulled each other❤️. I can’t get over him but it’ll happen eventually. But out of that my type is now only Hispanic guys they love hard and are really sweet when they like you he also treated me really well and seeing him change from macho to putty in my hands was so satisfying and adorable😩. If y’all couldn’t guess he was Puerto Rican😅.

MCheetah · Answer

Yeah. I used to put 55-60% into personality and 40-45% into looks. Now, I'm more like 75-80% into personality and only 20-25% into looks. Honestly, I just what a girl to be tall, curvy, not too old, and look feminine (like an actual woman) as far as looks go. And I'm willing to compromise on at least half of those four, as long as she has two of them. I also care more about women who have a nice personality, when back in my 20s, I used to take it for granted, cause it is RARE AF among women, nowadays! Just a woman who isn't entitled and thinks she's owed a 9 out of 10 man is rare, nowadays!

PaynefulPleasures · Answer

Yes time takes a toll even on our choices for future decisions especially relationships
For me it's a work in progress I'm not yet ready but when I'am I want someone who knows what they want, takes care of themselves, has drive, doesn't snuff at the small stuff, health should be pretty good, adventurous
Back in the day it was about kids school marriage all that crazy chit, now it's a different ball game
Excellent question you asked ✌️

Xoxocutekitty · Answer

Sure. When I was younger I used to date people who were interesting or different than me. I'd tell myself that their struggles were harder than mine and that I should accommodate them without expecting the same in return.

Now I date people who are 1) functional 2) who could pass the roommate test 3) would look forward to being married within 5 years (as a life goal, not necessarily with me)

If he can't hold at least a minimum wage job to pay his own bills, he's out. If he's a messy slob who also refuses to cook once a week, he out. If he abhors the idea of marriage or expects his bachelor lifestyle to extend another decade, he's out.

We can't be doing all the cute stuff like gaming until 3am, or binge watching movies, or doing the seggs if I'm worried about bills, our future, or other logistics.

alice55 · Answer

It’s changed with time, it's much higher now. I don't want to lose my time with some loser who have no confidence in himself or any passion of his own.
He need to have a great background (married parents, go along with his whole family, family quite well off financially), being serious and ambitious about his career, well dressed with new clothes (not clothes 10 years old), have a car, is tall, confident, look good and don't tell me what to do or how to dress, etc..

And guys I would never never ever date are "nice guys" those are the biggest assholes ever. My sister dated two and they're the worse scum on earth.

TessCasie · Answer

Of course it’ changes with time. Each relationship break up or heartbreak makes you learn and introspect what you want and like in a partner. That’s only if your willing to introspect not just jump into another relationship cause you find someone physically attractive only to end up feeling hurt again. That’s why most people say imma take things slower after being tricked wounded or hurt in past relationships.

The worst scenario could be focusing on sexual compatibility rather than other components on the relationship thus leading to heartbreak. If you enjoy other components such as love trust familiar or similar thinking pattern, values , lifestyle and goals in life sexual compatibility automatically comes in place.

VanillaSalt · Answer

My expectations have changed much but people’s opinions of it have… like the US dollar. The dollar never changes just the value of it… I want a traditional man but a traditional woman isn’t the norm anymore. Same demand but lower supply makes them more valuable…

That being said I won’t marry. That’s the big part of what’s changed. Marriages heavily against men as it has always been but it’s more acceptable to screw men over. It’s not that they will but that they could… men protect yourself. Date… have sex (protected and take the condom with you)… even have a long term relationship… but don’t cohabitate and don’t marry.

Devlaw5 · Answer

They’ve changed because I’ve changed. I think a change in preference is almost inevitable (emphasis on ‘almost’) once a person grows intellectually and emotionally. You look at the world differently, understand things differently. And as a result you’ll also desire different things. Someone who is less intellectually savvy may not be as attractive to you after you’ve grown, while the same person probably would’ve been attractive to you before said growth.

libsaretards · Answer

My preferences are mostly the same. The only real change is I am a lot more careful dealing with black women because a lot of them tend to cause/participate in unnecessary drama. I've dated 4 black women and ONLY ONE can I look back at and say she was deserving of any respect. Before these dates, I treated everyone openly. This is not because of racism, but because of cause and effect. While I have met amazing black people in my life and my closest friends are mostly black, as a whole black women have caused the most drama in my life and it is plain ignorant and annoying. Even my black male friends agree with me.

Chris423 · Answer

Absolutely, growing up I was always attracted to the prettiest, educated girls. Now, I'm more into meeting someone who enjoys good communication & enjoying a happy lifestyle

Leavesbound · Answer

Yes, when I was 12 I preferred teenage girls with big boobs. When I was a teen I preferred girls in their 20's with big boobs. Nothing changed when I hit my 30's. But when I got into my 40's I stopped caring about boobs and started to focus on the other side. By the time I was in my 50's I regretted that I was focused on body parts and not what was between the ears.

Grubhub · Answer

Yes, a lot of people are born white washed. For example myself used to prefer white women. Racism made me stop liking and pursuing them. Just like I read somewhere a white woman said she no longer likes black guys because a friend of hers got raped by a black dude. It goes both ways

iseekpinetrees · Answer

Most definitely Changed. If I was ever single again I'd definitely pick better candidates than I did while I was young and not have sex til officially dating.

Kha0tiic_xo · Answer

Yes it's changed for me, I look at things differently, I've grown a lot but most importantly I finally love myself, I realized things and relationships are worse when you don't love yourself!

FunkyMonkee · Answer

Slightly. I would've NEVER been interested in a black chick when I was young, mostly because my parents were prejudiced and I just followed their example. Now, I've seen quite a few I wouldn't mind doing the horizontal bomp with!!

XimenaV · Answer

I used to like loners and bad boys, now I like people who have a draft horse personality, so very sweet, gentle, intelligent, kind, calm and loving

candleteabrunch · Answer

It certainly has changed with time. I think also priorities change with anything as a person gets older and a little wiser. And circumstances may change.

WowwGirl · Answer

I demand honesty now period and looks matter much less now. I've always dated athletic guys with short hair and usually a size 12 shoe who don't wear pink or purple

Tiptoetamm · Answer

Definitely has changed as I get older my preference changes and things I like chance

fonduegirl · Answer

Went from Charlie Sheen to Oscar Wilde... So not much.

Alyssa11 · Answer

I used to like bad guys. Now I like kind men who spend time with their family. I matured I guess.

JSmuve · Answer

No, my preferences haven't changed. The only things that changed are I tolerate less bad behaviour and won't be serious with a woman who had a "bad boy" phase.

clampfan101 · Answer

The first girl I fell in love with was 100% perfect. She passed away, however… I’ve been wanting someone else like her ever since I moved on. (And no, not as a replacement. That’s of course impossible.)

ShutUpWhiteGirl · Answer

Not too much. I was used to preferring Latinas, now I prefer Latinas and Asian girls, meanwhile white girls are still subhumans in my book.

For all the rest, the same kind of girl I dated when I was a 18yo I still love dating these days.

Anonymous · Answer

Hahaha It has. Man with beard now. hahaha

poneglyphs · Answer

Still, hasn't changed because I still haven't dated anyone? So, I don't know if it will change?

exitseven · Answer

I am married but I imagine I would want to date a woman who would be much more adventurous.

otaku_owl_91 · Answer

They've changed for me brother, and I'm not a coon, but I gave up on our women. Don't worry, I'm not into white girls.

Anonymous · Answer

Unfortunately they have

CallmeTheKnight · Answer

Somewhat. I'm open to dating outside my race to an extent.

ManHater · Answer

Society has taught me as a white man that I should hate my white women and date black women or else I am a racist.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Basically the same. Only problem is those girls dont exist any more really. Sweet virgin submissive girls. So rare these days.

anylolone · Answer

Well, your dating preference change is literally the most common and predictable ever. lol!

JesseJayNeak · Answer

They didn't change much

Anonymous · Answer

Probably a little because I think I have higher standards than I did when younger

Anonymous · Answer

So basically reading all the women's responses they liked the douchbags and have been pumped and dumped and now want someone who is nice.

hhadeshatesme · Answer

Yes. I’m done with my bad boy phase

jakejacobson110 · Answer

Standards went up. Higher expectations.

blondfrog · Answer

Of course they have.

NoLookingAtSoleil · Answer

A little bit

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