Men over 30 how many dates would you wait for sex?

[Explorer91]

If your actually dating and not just for pure sex how many dates would you wait for sex before thinking this is becoming ridiculous.

[cth96190]

It is not possible to set a rule, because everyone is different and every interaction is different.
To me, sex is a serious matter.
I go in raw, so we would have to discuss the matter in advance, have blood taken and tested for every STD known to medicine, then exchange test results.
To me, the purpose of dating was always to audition women who I thought might fit the role of future wife. Evaluating her character and determining her genetic fitness to provide half the DNA of future children was far more important than a few seconds of ejaculatory release.
For that reason, sex took a distant back seat and I was not in a hurry.
I found myself in the interesting position that, if I tried, I would be accused of being a borderline rapist who was 'after only one thing'. If I did not try to rip off her panties during the first date, I was accused to being a closet homosexual. No matter what a man does, the female will condemn him for it.
The logical conclusion that it is better to not play the game. Better to just keep on walking.

[godfatherfan]

I am 52. The "sex date" is usually the 3rd date. I have had a few on the 2nd, and a couple on the 4th. I have never dated any woman since my divorce that went past the 4th date, and still continued to date her. Not that it makes a big difference to me, that is just how it has worked out. I personally think it is better to wait a little longer, say the 6th date. But women in their 40's + are very aggressive sexually. I even told one that if that is the way guys in their teens and 20's were, then I apologize for us men lol. Because wow.
Once you are in your 30's +, there should be no more of this "what will he/she think of me if I fuck him/her on the 2nd/3rd/et date". You are adults, it is an adult thing to do.

[Explorer91]

You misunderstand. I’m not worried what he will think. Or what date I should do it on.
I don’t want to do it at all but I want to date.
I’m worried that no man will take it seriously over 30.

[godfatherfan]

You want to date, but don't want to have sex? That is not what adults do, especially at 30. Honestly, sex isn't all that important to me at my age. However, even I wouldn't want to never have sex. If I wanted that, I just wouldn't date at all. That is exactly what I have been doing the last 5 or so years, not dating. But I am getting to the point where I would like a companion. But that absolutely means sex, even if it isn't all that often.

[Explorer91]

Yes that’s the problem. I want company but not the sex part atm. I get asked on a lot of dates that’s the issue. I yearn for company so when people ask me out hard to say no.

[MzAsh]

It’s interesting how much slut hatred there is while so many guys don’t want to wait for sex.
Fundamentally, its not about how many dates or time. It’s about measuring their investment and commitment. If I’m looking for a relationship with a guy, I absolutely must have his commitment and loyalty first.

[Explorer91]

I’m not so much worried about the commitment as guys can and do lie about their agenda to get sex, and then can dump you 3-6 months later.
It’s more if I feel comfortable and want to. I don’t want to seem like a child going on endless dates that really almost mimic friendship and emotional connection. I want to be taken seriously without necessarily having to have sex

[MzAsh]

Yeah I understand. Part of why I wanted to get really good at reading men was to see through their bs to their true intentions. Now I read men like a cheap paperback novel. But I understand not wanting to confuse men for friendship either. There really is no right or wrong answer here since there are many factors to consider, but fundamentally I do encourage women to have a strong qualification system in place before sex happens.

[Explorer91]

Ironically my body conscious issues acts as a natural boundary because I don’t feel good enough about my body to be like yes let’s just have sex. Even though most people think it’s just in my head.

[Ukrainianbuddafly]

I'm a woman but from experience if a man values you he will wait. There is no specific number. But you have to show profession, nobody likes to feel like they are putting effort into anything for nothing.

[MTC29]

If the lady and I were enjoying each other's company and spending quality time together, including holding hands, kissing, sitting closely together on the couch and discussing (for example) traveling together... by date 4 I'd begin wondering what the impediment to progress was?

The longest actual wait was date #6.

[JustinTimberlegs]

As long as I have to until she's comfortable.

Tbh I'm also a little inexperienced and awkward so I would prefer to wait, take our time dating and enjoy getting to know each other. Not sure if it's just because I'm not very experienced but sex isn't as important to me compared to other parts of the relationship, like trust, affection, humour, etc. It's more important that I feel good with her out of bed than in :)

[ChiTown33]

I wouldn't. I've never went on a date with the expectation of sex.
Honestly if I don't see the relationship progressing I'm more likely to end it. But that can't be measured in the amount of dates. Different people warm up to others at different speeds.

[Explorer91]

Yea I don’t find the average male sexually that much of a turn on initially, it takes time to warm up to them. Only super hot guys do I look at and go wow yes let’s do it I am so turned on. I can’t just be keen to fuck after two dates an average looking guy if there’s no emotional connection yet.

[ChiTown33]

I may be physically attracted from the get go. But I'm not a animal. I won't sleep with a woman I don't trust. Building trust takes time. And some women give you reason to trust slower than others.

[magiusX26]

depends on the chemistry between us, frequency of the dates, how long we took getting to know each other before/outside of the dates, how well we got to know wach other during the dates, and other such factors. all that being said, somewhere between zero and 8-ish.

[ChrisMaster69]

I actually wait nearly 3 months but 1 is a busted wrist and just being busy.

we had talked about it, so it was going to happen, just not a huge rush.

[Explorer91]

Yea I usually do as well because it takes me time to warm up to people. I’m not instantly turned on by the average guy. Only instantly turned on by Hot men in Netflix shows.
So I need time to actually be into them in that way. But at 30 it can seem teenage like to be like “let’s wait” that’s what I’m concerned over.

[ChrisMaster69]

@Explorer91 I need a high level of emotional connection first

[NathanDavis]

I just don't think of the sex... so it doesn't matter much to me

when I am interested in someone, I want to go after your soul... whatever else, happens when it happens... or not

[rcljr]

I had 1 try stringing me along for 3 months, kept blathering on about how she knows her worth, etc, etc, ad nauseum…we both in our late 50’s. Ain’t nobody got time for that shit.

[Explorer91]

She probably just wanted companionship rather that a sexual connection

[Anonymous]

Pro tip. Only beta bux Bill is expected to wait. Girls can't wait to have sex with the guys they are attracted to... Due to the internet, guys became aware of this dual mating pattern and adapted to it. Hence the 'this is becoming ridiculous'

[Explorer91]

In my early 20s yes. But I kind of feel pale and not as fit as I used to so I’m more body conscious and not as keen to jump in the sack straight away.

[slatyb]

A few weeks. If it hasn’t happened after a couple of months I will be wondering if she has much interest. . In my experience dating after my divorce most women were ready after three dates.

[Hairylegs222]

There's different kinds of sex. Do you mean any kind of sex? Because usually in my experience it starts as blowjobs and handjobs and leads up to vaginal sex. If it's any kind of sex, then only 2 dates. Vaginal sex then 1 to 3 months of dates.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

It totally depends on the girl & how hot & horny she is & it depends on how horny I am after the date as well.

[Cowboy6666]

I can't set rules but would say at least second time I can wait :)

[Anonymous]

More expect to see physical escalation date to date.

I'm willing to wait, but at the same time want to screen out women who aren't initially attracted.

[worldscolide]

i won't go near sex until the third date. Back when i was dating that is.

[Shy_Steve]

Probably 2 or 3, If you still don't want to have sex with him after that why are you with him.

[Explorer91]

I get body conscious. So I want to do it but can become hesitant to do it too quickly

[Shy_Steve]

Just talk about it with your Guy and see how he feels, He probably isn't over joyed about you seeing him naked either so try working on it together.

He doesn't deserve you if he is pressuring you.

[FamilyGuy2020]

Hmm, well considering we're going through the second Pandemic. FLORIDA LEADIG 110
HOUSAND NEW CASES AN ONLY 19 TO BEDS

[Anonymous]

Not a guy, but my now husband waited 3 months before having sex with me.

[TheFlak38]

I don't date. either she wants to fuck or we dont meet up.

[dudeinohio]

Same rule i always had. No sex by 3rd date means no 4th date.

[ElvenMr]

Probably when i feel comfortable enough with the girl.

[Strayedsoul]

Hard to define. Most of my relationships 1 to 3. Although I have waited 2 years as well. So it depends on the person.

[StunningANDbrave]

Why would a man in his 30s wait for something you gave away for free in your 20s?

[Turtleneck22]

I can’t put a number. To many variables at play. If I really wanted things to move forward you wait.

[mpodeszek]

2 dates then rough sex possibly because i am a daddy.

[Drumlin2001]

Less than 10, unless a good reason

[Canceled]

Zero. Don't be her dinner dad, guys.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

I VOTE MHO’s for this guy!

[Canceled]

Great minds think alike. Get that box, my jocks! 🦒🍆🇺🇸🎲

[Jamie05rhs]

I would wait 400 dates.

[Anonymous]

However long she wanted to

[msc545]

about 3 or 4 at most.

[spartan55]

Probably about five.

[exitseven]

Ten or 15 I guess.

[garykingg]

After marriage only.

[Luckycharms12]

3rd date rule

[CT_CD]

One…

[Twalli]

3 months minimum

[Hotboy_booblover]

1 or 2

[Anonymous]

Infinite idgaf