Can straight men and straight women be just friends? AKA the age old question?

Question

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I just watched when Harry met Sally and according to them no. But I don't know. Something about the idea that men and women can't be friends just urkes me. Even if there's all the proof in the world... I just feel like it makes men seem like all they really care about is sex and nothing more and women get this false sense of hope that someone sees them as a human and not a sex object... does that make sense? Like I want to believe that there's more to a relationship between a woman and a man than just sex.

Cherry234 · Accepted Answer

Yeah ofc they can be. They just have to set boundaries though, especially when relationships are involved. I think people shouldn't discriminate based on gender (or race and sometimes age) when it comes to friendship. I get that people have preferences, but if you like someone, those types of thing shouldn't matter. The connection you have with someone is more important

TwinTonyz · Answer

Loaded answer. They can be acquaintances just fine. Think how you would interact with coworkers.

You might ask what is the differential, and to that I would say it's the degree of camaraderie. My friends and I will roast each other saying legitimately hurtful things regularly. That kind of relationship borders on toxic, and with a kinda jestful homo-erotic. It's hilarious when newcomers discover this about us.

When you toss women into that environment, there is a compulsion to pull punches. Even writing this, I'm recognizing the subconscious limits I place on myself when interacting with either of them. Moreover, others in the group do the same, even without it being a spoken rule. I can't speak for any of them, but I'll speak for myself.

I've no intention of making a move on either, for various reasons, but even so, I don't treat them as I do my other friends. That's because I'm attracted to both of them. They are able to manage and survive in the, probably, toxic environment that me and the boys participate in. They don't break down and take everything personally and seriously. That's part of the appeal. That said, no matter how strong or tough you wife is, I don't think a lot of men would feel comfortable treating them like one of the boys.

Jake99999 · Answer

A guys honest perspective... every guy that is just "friends" with a woman, definitely has an attraction on some level. Whether they try to act on it, or make it overt, is another question.

That said, can it end up being a nice friendship that is enjoyed by both. Sure.

But show me a guy who is friends with a woman and spends time with her, and I will show you a guy who has an interest beyond just friendship.

I don't think it makes it any less of a friendship. But its there. This is probably true for a lot of women as well. I have had both men and women admit this. But hey, friends are good to have.

Ohshee1 · Answer

Yes. That's the best part about being a real friend a true friend is you know that if you were to take it past that the Friendship would not last it's the same with getting together with somebody you get together with somebody because you know it will last and you know when it won't last true friends except their friendship and they know the difference of lust or one night stand they're honest with themselves and they know down deep that it will not work I have many friends like that if we were to get together within two weeks 2 year we would not be friends anymore but as friends I have been friends with girls for over 30 years

Halibut · Answer

I think the most important thing to take into account is that whether or not they can permanently be friends, they'll definitely at least temporarily be able to be friends for awhile before at least one of them falls for the other... and that type of friendship is often the start of some of the healthiest romantic relationships in existence.

I don't think there is a better way to meet a long term partner than knowing them amongst a group of friends who hang out together, and eventually just naturally pair up. Tons of couples started off as friends, enjoyed each other's presence, and then naturally started dating because, if you're already friends with someone and you're single... why not date them?

Tunasub · Answer

Yes.. there doesn't even need to be a discussion between the 2 of them. If they start out as friends and have been friends over some years then there is a good chance that it will be a friendly relationship.

There also has to be some respect and for one another in regards to that friendship. If things were to change there should be clear communication which can not get lost at the onset of something more than friendhip.

The biggest relationship killer in a regular friendship and a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship is lack of communication.

ChrisMaster69 · Answer

Yes of course, I have straight, bi and lesbian girl mates. We are great friends and do stupid shit.

I have female work friends that was straight and single and I socialise with.

it’s just a lack of self control if someone cannot be friends with someone without sexualising them.

ronaldo75 · Answer

No. I'm not sure why woman particularly keep asking this shit knowing the answer very clearly. You know full well everyone of your male friends has thought of fucking you. You've even caught everyone of them taking a peek at you at one time or another. You've even caught your female friend's boyfriends taking a peek at your butt or your chest at one time or another. So you know the answer. Even if a guy is "like a brother to you", trust me he's imagined having sex with you.

NathanDavis · Answer

and the old answer is yes...

my best friend is a woman, and we're both straight

most of my other best friends, are also women and one is bisexual, the other are straight

and then I have more friends and acquaintances too... straight, lesbian, bisexual... and it all goes with no issues really

and it's been long years like that, as well

Avicenna · Answer

Yes, of course. It's nice to have a platonic friendship where there isn't sexual tension and you can get or give some honest advice.

I used to get jokes about me and my female friends pairing up, but we never wanted it. Now, had they come on to me, I wouldn't have turned them down if I was single, but it never happened.

Medhat-M · Answer

I love how all people are like sure why not and in reality everyone's friends from the opposite sex are for : eye candy, ego boost, validation device, potential candidate for plan B And rebounds... People are so lame and pretentious...

Pj1981 · Answer

I've been conflicted by this question for a while. I have a female friend who at one time I was spending about 20 hours a day with her. We kept it friendly but there was quite a bit of sexual tension, and flirting. We are still good friends but live 1100 miles apart. If we would have continued on the way we were I am almost positive it would have crossed the line. I can't say it's not possible though.

Made4sex · Answer

If it is an age old question then what makes you think that you will get anymore accurate of an answer?
yes! But with certain perimeters…
only providing that both heterosexual individuals are respectful and open minded!

888theGreat · Answer

I had an older female friend , we still are but not like before. I was in flea markets with her, then I got out before she did , now she is out of them. Her daughter got divorced and they bought a house together , so that changed things a lot. I don't think Daughter was too keen on me either. But we were friends as much as friend is defined.

Twalli · Answer

One of my female friends (let's call her M) recently got married. I have never been attracted to M, but we are close enough that I was invited to the wedding. M is a bit on the heavy side and taller than me. These combined make her completely unattractive to me. She has never been attracted to me, probably due to the same disparity in our sizes. We are still good friends because we like a lot of the same things. That's really all you need for a friendship, similar interests.

snackthatsmilesback · Answer

If you can't be friends with someone just because of their sex, then you're either sexist or bad at friends. That's been my experience anyway.

DonkeyDan · Answer

I have a few female friends that I don't have any feelings towards, and as far as I know they don't towards me either, so yes it is possible. I think it depends on how the person sees and respects the opposite sex.

RaeShirley · Answer

Well, my best friend is a guy and neither of us has any romantic feelings towards each other so personally, I know it may not work for some people, but being friends has worked out perfectly for us so far🙂

haphazard · Answer

Uh yeah... they are friends all the time. They can't necessarily not be sexually attracted to each other though. If you think otherwise, chances are you are probably lying to yourself.

FriendlyDrugDealer · Answer

It depends on how they met but in theory it is possible. I’ve met women through work and other friends and remained perfectly good friends and nothing more. IT’s challenging but doable

Smoke-n-Growls · Answer

Yes they can. And anyone who thinks otherwise likely is their own reason why they can't have platonic friends.

EmbraceThePain · Answer

No, I personally do not think so.  Now there are unique or rare circumstances but these aren’t the norm at all.

SaoirseS · Answer

I have guy friends who have been friends as far back as I can remember, and other guy friends who’ve always been platonic friends.

Alyssa11 · Answer

I can be friends with guys, but I’ve never had a guy friend who hasn’t sexualised me in one way or another..

TheFlak38 · Answer

no it's impossible and Gag in itself is enough proof for that. With every click on the newsfeed we see another "OMG! I thought we were friends but now he says he wants to fuck me! What do I do?" question

Bjornasey · Answer

If even women cannot be actual friends with each other then I doubt men will be able to do that any better.

clampfan101 · Answer

Absolutely. I can easily be just friends with a woman. It’s actually easier for me to talk about certain things with girls, like love. (Love in general. Not with them.)

ThatNoUVAtYourEyes · Answer

I was told it is not recommended since you end up, effectively, telling the other person they are ugly.
It is kind of true. You can be friends first, but it leads to genitals (I can confirm that, and it was nice/good)

DeeDeeDeVour · Answer

Yes, of course. Why is hard to believe that straight men and straight women can be just friends?

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Not as far as I can tell. I am open to the possibility, but I have never once seen that work in my own life.

normalice · Answer

If they've had sex with each other and still get along after deciding to stop having sex, sure.

humanearth · Answer

I have a female best friend for over 30 years. That longer than my marriage

Blackcupcake · Answer

Yes, a lot of my friends are guys and we’ve never had any issues

douride2 · Answer

I have had a guy friend since back in grade school. Nothing more. If he has ever had thoughts outside of friendship he has kept them to himself.

iamElisa · Answer

i think no after a while feelings can change and if it's an unrequited change the disaster is inevitable.

Omar5881 · Answer

Yeah they can be , only if he doesn't have secret feelings for her and she doesn’t put him in that “ friendzone “ area where she believes he has secret feelings while he is not

jeffryrobertbabb · Answer

I have been best friends with Jane for around 30 years and never had anything sexual, only a peck on the cheek, I don't expect that to alter. We are not sexually attracted to each other.

exitseven · Answer

Yes they can. Sometimes it can get complicated thought.

Aquariusmystery · Answer

I want to say yes but inevitably at least one catches feelings and then that’s game over

fred_durst · Answer

you know , if they are both single and spend so many quality times together , it is only matter of time until one of them develop a feeling

MM5578 · Answer

Only if they don’t have feelings for each other. If one person has feelings for the other that are not mutual then no.

scooogy · Answer

I recently found out that if the partner doesn't want you to be just friends with anyone, the answer is no.

Wise4myage · Answer

I've always thought so, but you might have to establish some boundaries at some point.

HaveNoName · Answer

As long as there is no sexual tension or even a hint of attraction, yes it is possible. Otherwise, there is always a hidden agenda, more so from the guys' side.

OnTheLevel · Answer

It's possible but the guy will always wonder what it would be like to get with you.

Dinosaursandanime65 · Answer

Yeah, I think Ragg Tagg and Jelly are a good example.

Anonymous · Answer

Easily. But many people apparently don't want that, hence why you asked.

Anonymous · Answer

They can be friends, but the guy will still have sexual thoughts about her from time to time.

JosyJosy · Answer

Yes I don't see why not.

Rangers · Answer

No, a man and a woman can never be just friends

Arabella_Rose · Answer

they can be friends. but not close friends

zagor · Answer

Yes, I used to have several such friends.

Iron_Man · Answer

Not once you already dated

kingykringy · Answer

If they have their romantic life fulfilled

Diya010 · Answer

I don't think it's possible for st8 men.

Gwenhwyfar · Answer

They definitely can

karaspara · Answer

Yes they can

alance99 · Answer

Yes for sure

vald9inches · Answer

With benefits?

Bluemax · Answer

Certainly.

JennieF · Answer

Yeah. Why not?

Can straight men and straight women be just friends? AKA the age old question?

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