What if you fall for someone who has kids? Is that a deal breaker for you?

Question

NicoletteXO · Accepted Answer

Of course not. If they are amazing, their kids will be an asset. And it will be a privilege to be in their lives. Children are beautiful.

Jem38 · Accepted Answer

I have no problem about a guy having a kids from his previous relationship. I will love them too.

OldFurTrapper · Answer

No, it was not a deal breaker. I knew she had two children before from a previous marriage that ended when her husband died! I received a message from God, that is the only way I understand it to this this day. I was to marry my wife on Long Island whom I hadn't even spoken too on a web site named Third Age. Com. We met and by the third date over dinner, we agreed to get married. Now I never told her from the start that I was told to marry her. By the third date over dinner I made the proposal. She had also received that same message mentally that we were to be married and she said yes. I had three children from a previous marriage. I had never mentioned to her what I had been told until sometime after we were committed to marry. The Lord, the Man Upstairs, had given her the same message by our third date! It is a mystery to this day, just how our marriage came to be, even after 20 years! But it works! And despite the fact we are opposites on political issues and our backgrounds, this marriage has survived and grown stronger!

Citizenkirk · Answer

Deal sealer, with two wonderful adult stepchildren too call my own.☺️
Kid's too be there for, andfand too hang out with.😉
Plus, a qualified electrician and automotive diagnostics technician, means this guy old Auto assembly machine tool@die man needs only to fabricate parts and materials, and they do the rest in restoring this slow ride😤Hemi-wishes-it-were,8 cylinder nitrous fed@cooled, muscle family Sunday cruiser👉 I'm not going to tell you year and model, because it blow's stock production models off the road without half the noise and heat expenditure. Conservative hot rod🚗☺️😤🤯🏎️💨

MintChocolateChip · Answer

I wouldn't think it's a deal-breaker, kids are a huge blessing, and I'd feel honored to help raise them. The only thing that might be is in regards to the person's backstory? Why did they split up? Is there a genuine reason or will this be a pattern? I'm Christian and disapprove with divorce out of the exceptions of abuse or cheating. If it would have been a divorce or kids from a previous unmarried relationship, I would want to be sure of the guy's character, faith, and how much he is truly willing to work for a relationship even when things get hard.

horatiohornblower · Answer

Kids wouldn't be an issue. They're awesome.

The relationship with their ex would be. They need to be on congenial terms with their ex and all custody settled. That or the other needs to be a deadbeat who's completely out of the picture with no chance of returning. The last thing I want is to be in the middle of two parents fighting over their kids.

Datboi65 · Answer

Yeah, huge deal breaker. I'm not about to step in and be step dad so someone else's kids, that I will probably have to pay child support for in the case of a divorce. Also, bare in mind you will never be the main priority, the kids will be (because they are kids and need attention). I say for single mothers, better go after men who have children, not childless men, because 90% if the time the answer will be no thanks.

Kaamraj · Answer

Sexual attraction is non-negotiable. You cannot determine beforehand if you will be attracted to someone or not. However, committing to a woman with kids is a evolutionary bad deal because you are expending your resources to secure the legacy of someone else.

casserolie · Answer

if they are literally the best person that has ever came into my life, i would be willing to treat their children like my own.
Besides, its like having a kid without going through the intense pain of childbirth. I find that to be a positive.

SofiSin667 · Answer

Honestly, I prefer single dads. They have their stuff together and know exactly what they want in a partner already because they’re looking out not only for themselves but their kids too.

TrueConfection · Answer

It would not be if I wasn't already married. I love kids and could love someone else's kids just as much as I love my own.

19magic · Answer

I do like how the guys are more against it than girls, but it'd be hypocritical of me to so yes. So I'm fine dating someone with kids as I have one myself. Was I stupid yes but hey aren't we all at some point

DonkeyDan · Answer

Not necessarily, I never had my own, but it would depend if I got on with them. I certainly wouldn't rule it out but if I was going to be that involved with someone I'd have to get in with her kids and then get on with me.

LinaDaGoddess · Answer

No, because I’m a parent.. I prefer dating someone who they themselves are also parents because they understand being busy.

Anonymous · Answer

The only way this would be a deal breaker is if the kids made it abundantly clear that they didn't want any part of me in their life or if the guy made no efforts to also make me a priority in his life.

t-8900 · Answer

1 very young child or a child almost out of the house then okay. I'm not trying to raise a whole family by another man. I want my own biological children too

420Rachel · Answer

Well considering that I am dating someone with kids, not it's not a deal breaker. 😁 I love kids and I think I'd be a good step mommy.

Dchrls78104 · Answer

Life is already hard enough without having to put up with burdens on your back that you did not even make. I wouldn't date a woman with kids---it would be a dealbreaker for me.

Little_Bumblebee · Answer

It's a dealbreaker for me.  It's putting a lot of pressure on the relationship and I'm not even sure I want my own kids... I don't need others'

tatianamay · Answer

It's a huge deal-breaker. I do not want kids until im in my 30s, and being a step-mom is not for me. It's a lot of work. I do not know if they would even like me

Nomina · Answer

Not a deal breaker but I would proceed with caution and very slowly.

NathanDavis · Answer

under many circumstances no, it would not be a deal breaker

kyleelyn199723 · Answer

It would for me, just because I don’t want that kind of responsibility lol

Blackcupcake · Answer

nope, I don't see why that would be an issue for me personally.

karaspara · Answer

I have two myself so no not a dealbreaker a lot to consider though for sure for all concerned

Anonymous · Answer

It wouldn’t happen. This happens to men who don’t get laid much. The only reason you’d consider it would be if you had no other good options who were childless.

Diodoro · Answer

I personally would not be exclusive with a woman raising another man's children.

MuddyMole · Answer

Been there, done that, and wouldn't do it again - so yes, it's a deal breaker.

spookywashere · Answer

Yes and no. It depends on the person I'm with, and the situation.

markayd · Answer

For most young people under 40, yes its a deal breaker.

Katebfun · Answer

I'd it's meant to be and the love just happens then I wouldn't mind.

Saville_Row · Answer

If we really connect and he's open to ALSO start a family with me, it wouldn't be a deal breaker.

Bigjohn2021 · Answer

Depending. Everyone that chooses to bring kids into this world is not fit to be parents. I once dated a young lady that had multiple kids (Teenagers). As a single mother with a full time job it was hard for her to provide structure consistently. In other words they were out of control, it Disrespectful, lazy and demanding.

If a single woman or man chooses to entertain a relationship she / he has to be able to juggle both kids and a significant other…

will34 · Answer

Of course not my girlfriend has kids anyways it’s probably a good experience for people who doesn’t have kids because you can be more prepared in the future if you want to have kids like taking care of them and stuff

Hangry06 · Answer

As long as i don't have to interact with the kids, it's okey

exitseven · Answer

I used to think so but now I think if the kids are older I would be okay with it.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Yeah it is. No single moms. y'all already had your chance.

Shizunk · Answer

I don't fall. I see where I am going. And its definitely not to someone who has children and failed to pick someone who would stick around.

jasco · Answer

I have thought about it and I wouldn't mind being a dad

FinalFantasyBro · Answer

I don't want children right now but later in life I only want to be responsible for one child and that would be it. But no I wouldn't date a person who has kids at the moment because I don't want to risk turning into a step father.

lovedejj_xo · Answer

It’s a dealbreaker for me I have no children at 25 and I’m content with that. Comes with too much baggage.

Justneedtokno · Answer

It’s not a dealbreaker because I love kids. The dealbreaker is how involve the X is. Because that could ruin our relationship if they still want to be with them vice versa

MCheetah · Answer

I can't be a cuckfather to anyone's kids. Ain't happenin'.

Morgador · Answer

Not a issue. You could have a huge positive impact on them and them you

zagor · Answer

No it's not. It would be a factor, but not a deciding one.

Shiningtempest · Answer

@spacegalaxy That would be a deal-breaker for me because there wouldn't be sufficient time to bond with her over a shared interest in video games.

HighValue · Answer

Yes, it is a deal breaker. I wouldn't be interested in the first place if she already had kids.

Shy_Steve · Answer

It's not a dealbreaker, It just might make things a bit harder financially that's all.

Jayplays900 · Answer

I don't even know if they'd like me as their step-parent.

Joshua0213 · Answer

Nah as long as they'd have at least 1 kid with me in the future

thegirlinstilettos · Answer

A deal breaker for me. Only because I don’t have any children. I want to start a family.

crazysassypaws21 · Answer

hell no, kids are a blessing, if anything it give u a reason to be a better man. so in my book not a deal breaker

dreamstar72 · Answer

For me it would basically be “why or how or many or when”

SenseiSeptred · Answer

Only if I remain the boss of the house and set the rules in place that doesn't get questioned, and that they are Asian of some sort.

okeydoke · Answer

Right now yes. But only because I don’t want to settle in one place yet, and I think it’s unfair to drag a kid around the world.

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

It won't happen. I'm not trying to be a step dad. Not for me.

Guanfei · Answer

It's just much harder, dating someone with kids brings much more issues.

Anonymous · Answer

Yes I'm not wasting my time on someone elses kids. Where did they go? Did they die? I'm not facilitating fuckboys

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Yeah it's a dealbreaker

Anonymous · Answer

Depends if I feel prepared enough

JesseJayNeak · Answer

Yes, it would. And a big one too

Anonymous · Answer

Not if that someone is single.

What if you fall for someone who has kids? Is that a deal breaker for you?

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