Statistics show virgin women cheat less and divorce less. I can see why you would think what you think but its not true. Most men have experienced the opposite so we gut instinct that its not true as well. For example I've met many high body count women who cheated. I've never met a virgin who cheated. Im sure its happened but out of counting my friends and my own experiences girls with high body count majority of them cheat.
@bamesjond0069 link to your stats please. I find this hard to believe. UNLESS the reason those 'virgin women' don't cheat is because they are super religious. In which case, it is the religion causing the non-cheating, not the fact of virginity. But open to your stats. Please show them!
@bamesjond0069 also, a virgin by definition CANNOT cheat. Otherwise she's no longer a virgin... so...
@bamesjond0069 also, like I said, I have never met a woman who is a virgin beyond her early 20s who is not psychologically 'off'.
Just did a quick google "... using data from the three most recent waves of the National Survey of Family Growth (NSFG) collected in 2002, 2006-2010, and 2011-2013. For women marrying since the start of the new millennium:Women with 10 or more partners were the most likely to divorce, but this only became true in recent years;Women with 3-9 partners were less likely to divorce than women with 2 partners; and,Women with 0-1 partners were the least likely to divorce.Earlier research found that having multiple sex partners prior to marriage could lead to less happy marriages, and often increased the odds of divorce."ifstudies.org/.../counterintuitive-trends-in-the-link-between-premarital-sex-and-marital-stabilityBut come on, you really think virgins, virgins, the ones who are head over heels for their boyfriend or husband, are the ones that are driving the about 50% infidelity statistic? Lmao. Really? And the girl who is wild party woman slept with all the men is the one who really commits and keeps her legs closed and faithful? Really? If thats what you think it just shows you've never dated women at all. Lmao.
Why does she have to be beyond her early 20s? You do know men usually date at least a bit younger often times.
@bamesjond0069 why would you assume a virgin in more likely to be "head over heels" for someone? That's just not true.
Also, I'm saying a woman who is a virgin won't be one forever. After a period of time in relationship, she will wonder what she missed out on. Someone who commits after having experience is committing through maturity, not idealized naivety. I think you really have women wrong.
Just reading what you've linked to... interesting... I'll have to give it a proper 'once over' (haha) before getting back to you. Though the first observation is that I was right about the link between virginity and religion. Also, this IFS looks like a religious institution itself... hmmm...
Nicole is correct on them wondering. I have enough female friends now to know more about how the thinking is. And infidelity rates have gone up across the board but mostly among women. Currently 12% of men and 13% of women ar cheating on their partners from millennials on down. Having now seen that statistic I realize I have had a lot of shitty gfs, not that a lot of women are shitty. Most likely you're going to find more of the shit through dating apps or going to the wrong scenes. Early warning signs need to be noted as well. There are plenty of women who got around in their younger years that would never dream of cheating on their SO. Plus people so change. My mother was a virgin when she met my dad. They dated for 5 years and somewhere in that time my mom lost her virginity. After being in a 21 year relationship she became a cheap whore and destroyed the family unit. And by the way I have evey right to call that woman whatever tf I want. Virginity doesn't count for shit. If she's sexually repressed best be prepared for fuck ups along the way!
@t-8900 Totally right. What I think is the most significant is actually not whether someone is a virgin or not. But whether they are sexually alive, expressed and in integrity. There are many women (and men) who are sexually repressed/blocked, and many who are acting out sexually. The 'body count' is irrelevant (also I hate the term 'body count' - these are intimate experiences with real humans, not 'bodies'). If a woman is a virgin, but is sexually blocked... sure, you MAY get 'lack of cheating' in some instances... but most likely this is because she is repressed by religious fear, not because she doesn't want to. And this lack of sexual aliveness will be experienced in your relationship another pernicious ways. If she is a virgin due to her own genuinely held convictions, these problems won't arise. BUT I have to say, I have NEVER met a woman who held onto her virginity beyond her late teens/ early 20s who was doing so because of actual personal inner conviction. ALWAYS these women are brainwashed by religious zealotry. So what you think you gain in 'virtue' from them, you'll lose in terms of personality, confidence, capacity for intelligent and independent thought, and many other qualities which actually are necessary to keep the spark of a profound relationship alive. Unless you're satisfied with a super mediocre relationship with a mediocre woman. Then, go for it.
A woman with sexual experience is something neutral in and of itself. Yes, there are some women who have 'slept around' for bad reasons - just like men. However, most actually have simply had a series of heartfelt and genuine intimacies with people who they either loved or cared for a lot. Alongside perhaps a few truly spontaneous and life-giving experiences which have provided beautiful knowledge of their own and male sexuality. These are women with WISDOM and power, with knowledge and confidence. These are the kind of women who make amazing partners. Obviously the ones who just slept with a lot of people and can't really articulate why or what it meant to them are low class people in general, so stay away. But this has nothing to do with their 'body count' and everything to do with their mentality. So in sum, being a virgin is mostly not a virtue, and is often a sign of a woman who is ideologically possessed by religious fear or zealotry - not a great partner choice, unless you are also a religious zealot. In which case, enjoy. Having sexual experience may be a problem for a certain demographic of women (as it is for some men), but more often than not it is actually the sign of a woman's wisdom and power. Meaning she will be a better partner ultimately.
@t-8900 so a virgin was faithful for 21 years. You do know the average length of a marriage is 8 years. So she was far more successful than typical. Do you think your dad would have had a longer lasting marriage with say a girl who slept with 50 men? Personally id bet it would have ended a hell of a lot sooner.
Who says all non virgin women have sex with 50 partners? Way too much red pill nonsense. I know girls who have had more partners but most have like 5-12ish. I'd say most are even still single digits. But if you watch those dumbasses like Taylor the fiend and fresh and fit who take the absolute worst case scenarios and than try to spin it like the rules heather than exceptions then ofc you're gonna fall for that shit. Most of the Mgtows and stuff are losers, not winners. You get hung up on her body count. How much you smashed? Either a lot and you're being a hypocrite or not a lot and you're insecure. Thank God I've come to see the light so I can love my best life. Y'all forget women are human too. They have natural urges like us. And who are we as men to tell them to live an unhappy life for antiquated, prudish, and repressive ideas.
@t-8900 if body count doesn't matter than whats wrong with using 50 as an example? I've had sex with a lot and noticed a clear pattern. Less sex a girl has the better for a relationship. I've personally not met any clear exceptions to the rule although its certainly not the only factor.And its not hypocritical. Men and women are clearly different. If you pulled your pants down and her skirt up is blatantly obvious. If i was a girl i would date a very experienced man. But im not, nor am i gay, so i really dont need to have an opinion on that.
Simply because it's not the norm dude. It doesn't matter that we're different it does matter that you expect her to not go around having sex while you do. Shoulda wifed one up young if you cared so much about it
@t-8900 "Shoulda wifed one up young if you cared so much about it" i think you are mistaking what im saying... im not complaining here just stating my opinion that virgins make far better relationships. My girlfriend was a virgin when i met her so i got what i wanted. Made me sad there were so few girls to choose from but i got someone who meets my requirements for a relationship.
t-8900 "How much you smashed? Either a lot and you're being a hypocrite or not a lot and you're insecure." EXACTLY. This sums up the whole thing!Then he tells us he's slept with loads of women. So yes, a hypocrite. Pot calling the kettle black. I feel for his girlfriend. She sounds naive. Shame she ended up with a misogynist. She chose poorly.
Don't you dare prefer taller men, or men who earn more money than you, that would be extremely hypocritical for you to want to date any of those men.
@bamesjond0069 This is irrelevant. What you are seeking to do is draw an analogy between what you imagine my preferences in men might be - and suggesting that if it's reasonable I have preferences, it's also reasonable that you do. But that is beside the point. I have no problem with you personally preferring a virgin. However, your commentary here reveals slatherings of misogynistic and hypocritical ideology. So, I feel for your girlfriend, not because you have a preference, but because you have a pernicious mentality. Like, there is a difference between me saying that I prefer a man who is slightly taller than me, and me saying not only do I prefer that, but all men who are shorter than me are sub-human.
When did i say sluts are sub human? They just do not meet my dating requirements and have no romantic value to me. They are still people, just not ones i care to date. I dont date men, does that mean i think they are sub human too? I think you just are overly offended and take everything personally and read your own personal problems into what others say. Do you deep down feel like you are sub human? Maybe a licensed therapist can help you with your self esteem issues. Id start there.
How dare a woman want a man who appears to be physically capable of protecting her from danger and giving her strong off spring... and also how dare a woman have a sexual past which reflects the human nature of our polyamorous roots. How dare women be human beings!
@t-8900 lmao 🤣 no comment necessary. you're either single or you say "please mommy dont spank me" to your girlfriend/wife.
Not single and you're wrong. Your preconceptions show your lack of know in human psychology and biology. If suggest you read up on such subjects before going on about nonsense. Don't let a burger flipper lecture a NASA scientist 🤷♂️
@bamesjond0069 You yourself are a slut, and you admit that. So, you can pretend you have 'standards' all you like... but you're also a raging hypocrite. You believe that you have a right to have sexual experience, but women are somehow lesser if they do. Hypocrisy and delusions of grandeur would be a great thing to discuss with YOUR therapist.
@t-8900 then why are you simping for online slutty women everywhere?
@NicoletteXO and who doesn't like a girl with a good cowgirl game? 🤭
Well lucky for me the majority of women are hypocrites in the opposite manner. Why do all these women find out i sleep around then want to fuck me and date me? What hypocrites! How dare they want an experienced man and have little experience themselves. Wtf. Lmao. Luckily i didn't judge my girlfriend too harshly and accepted her virgin ass.
@bamesjond0069 He's not. He's an actual man. You're just an insecure man slut who's gotten a little too big for his boots. I can see now why you like virgins. They're the only ones naive enough to indulge your arrogance and ignorance.
I think a real man, no a real adult has the maturity to admit when the are wrong, continues to always ask questions, explore, experiment, without giving a shit what others have to say about it. If your ideas of female sexuality were so accurate then so many females wouldn't be having sex before marriage. Even Martin Luther back in the 1500's wrote about chastity among women being nearly impossible and that most women were not virgins on their wedding night. This isn't some new concept. We are living with backward ideas on sexuality based on some prudish idiots who based their lives around the wrong interpretations of ancient scriptures, which by the way don't even agree with each other. Basing your society and sexual morality around ideas that go against 3 million years of evolution is as idiotic as it gets.
@t-8900 Exactly. It's simply a method that insecure men use to try to keep themselves safe. The same reason why men demand women's bodies be veiled or (in many Islamic countries) the same reason they prevent women from leaving the house without a chaperone. Because they are deeply, deeply afraid of female sexuality. They wish to control and hoard it at all costs. They fear that if it were not kept under lock and chain, it would never be freely given to him... because ultimately he feels unworthy of freely given female sex and love. That's some truth right there.
It's interesting that the woman listened to the serpent, and ate of the fruit of knowledge... this has been interpreted in Christianity as woman being responsible for 'original sin'... but actually, the serpent in almost all other cultures has been a representative of spiritual awakening, life-force, power, wisdom and healing. Could it be that in fact it is women are the bearers of such great erotic, sexual and creative power that men have twisted this in order to retain some modicum of power for themselves? Not understanding that by repressing and demeaning a woman's sexuality, he in fact denies himself and all of humanity the deepest possibilities of awakening to the truth? After all, Eve awakened the knowledge of good and evil. Before that, humans were simple minded fools.
Its mainly for relationships. Like i said i banged lots of sluts... i dont particularly care to be single and screw every girl under the sun. Its just the lowest form of value for a woman. Since i can get sex from sluts so easily its not really worth anything at all. Only is valuable from a highly selective girl.
@bamesjond0069 And yet the irony is that your 'highly selective girl' chose a man who is full of disdain for females, and full of misunderstanding about their value. A man who seeks to project what he himself is (a low-grade slut) onto the world. So she is naive - not selective. You were not chosen because she is wise. You were chosen because sadly, she doesn't know any better.
A woman with a higher libido is more likely to pass it on to the offspring, making the chances for your genes to get passed on way more likely. Prudish people seem mentally unwell half the time. Give me a chick who doesn't lie to herself please and thank you
@t-8900 It's so true. Women who fetishize their own virginity are frequently either mentally unwell or religiously brainwashed. And men who fetishize women's virginity are usually a combination of deeply insecure, and falsely moralistic.
@NicoletteXO and a lot of them are creepy pedos. I think for a lot of them it's an excuse to hide other fantasies and also fear of their size being too small in their own minds. I feel like porn fucks with their heads a lot. If a girl got it out of her system and she sticks with you doesn't that mean that 1: She doesn't need to wonder about the what could have beens?2: She knows why she's in the relationship and knows why she's committed?3: She's not making sex the top priority? Bonus: she's gonna be better in bed anyways.
I've only ever known 3 or 4 virgins in my life that waited past college... all mentally VERY unstable and now beyond being dateable.
@t-8900 Super accurate assessment!
@t-8900 i agree about them waiting so long. The whole point of waiting till marriage as then you have a point to go get married and not wait till you're 35. Virgins are ideal but i doubt id date an older virgin or very inexperienced woman because id highly suspect mental issues.
@bamesjond0069 okay so it begs the question... are you just into young um... women? Like that's a question. Do women hit a certain age and then you just turn off to them sexually? could be a fetish clouding how you view the opposite sex man. And i'm not saying that to bash you. I took human psychology and find the human mind fascinating. But always keep questioning and never stop. Never settle for one conclusion, strive for more.
Most women I know were virgins till marriage. Most of them are happily married. Stop making slutty assumptions about virgin girls in order to upgrade real sluts
Besides I doubt confident men get turned on by imagining how their wives were smashed by other men. Only cucks would love that.
@t-8900 younger women are far ideal for serious relationships at least in terms of what i look for. So really thats not a downside to date younger, its a plus.Fertility window is largeSexual experience is on average lowerPhysical looks better/will last longerLess hearbreak usually gives sweeter more open personalityLess likely to have debt or long term life committments
@marish01 confident men dont need to worry about their girl fleeing them either. that's one of the main reasons guys go for virgins thinking this is the case. At the end of the day it's apart of antiquated ideas of preliminary measures to make sure that they dont do it by enforcing laws and rules on them. if the guy is so great he doesn't need to worry. if the girl goes off and runs away she wasn't worth keeping around. it's really that simple. And you live in Armenia, right? I wonder how much different it would be if women have more choices there because the trends all over the world are that when women are left to their own devices they choose to not stay virgins till marriage on the whole.
@t-8900 I've only once met a girl who compained about losing virginity till marriage being shameful.We all want to get married, be loved and cherished. This is our choice.Why would I want my man to touch me without bothering to want to spend his life with me?
@bamesjond0069 looks are dependent more on genetics. Age can be used as a general rule but genetics and personal taste vary. I think girls in their mid and upper 20's look better than 18 year olds for example. Hardships make people more relatable, build character, and maturity. Sexual experience is not one dimension. it could also mean she's a horrible lay, just saying.
@NicoletteXO I am an abstinent virgin. What should my non virgin husband's views on my virginity to be for him not to be misogynistic?He should think I should have had sex with others?LolIs that what you think would be a man worthy of me?
A virgin in her late 20s won't wonder what other men will feel after losing her virginity. Because if she had a slutty character she wouldn't be a virgin at that age.
@marish01 in my lived experience thats just not true. I find the virgin girls a lot of times like i said have something wrong with them upstairs. Major sexual repression makes them either deeply resentful or they become pent up and wanting to just unleash it once they have the chance. then they want something more. this is going off the few virgins I've known in my life, I can throw my mother into the mix too.
@t-8900 "when women are left to their own devices they choose to not stay virgins till marriage on the whole."Most women make bad choices. No wonder why there are so maby failed relationships. Those men were CHOSEN by women. Remember most women are not smart. And most men are not smart either.Most people don't have the best traits.
@marish01 so then women shouldn't vote or work in fields of science or law i guess.
@t-8900 why do you think virgins force themselves to close their legs.I have no urge for sleeping with my boyfriend before marriage. I guess my urge for marriage beats my urge for sleeping him.
@t-8900 you're talking about genetic beauty... thats different. Im talking about youthful beauty. If you are with a 20 year old she will look of a sexually attractive age from 20 to say 40. If you get with a 30 year old thats 10 years less of some of the most highly attractive years.
@bamesjond0069 i can't agree. Some women look better as they mature, some dont. that really honestly depends.
@t-8900 ayone should work in the fields where they are productive
@t-8900 i agree but if you're with her when she's younger you will be there for every single year of her attractive life. If you catch her at your ideal age then she will soon be older in a few years and you missed the whole begging of the curve. you're thinking is very short term to just want what you want right now with no thought to how it shoots you in the foot over the long term.
The opinion owner assums non virgins are confident. Confidence is not linked to how sexually active women are. Sluts are not virgins, right? But they are usually insecure women.Most women are not virgins but very very few women are confident.Funny how she falsely describes non virgins in a way that makes them appear better than virgins. 😄😄
@marish01 if you look at scholarly productivity and the belt curve for IQ men and women equal out with women being smarter than average and men being the bulk of geniuses. We wouldn't have survived as a species if women weren't smart. They've been biologically wired to know how to manipulate men, it's one of their strongest evolutionary traits. Our species found it's roots in open poly tribal societies. Women knew how to get all the men to sleep with them to make sure none knew who the biological father was. This allowed her to choose the best genes and ensure that all the males protected her along with the other women. that's just how things were and people dont want to accept it. People are too arrogant to accept the truth of human evolution out of a sense of superiority. Chimps for example are our closest living relatives and they have Patriarchies and Matriarchies just depends on each troop. Likewise humans have had Patriarchy and Matriarchy throughout the world, many who lived side by side from each other. Patriarchy tended to bring more violence and war, matriarchy tended to be more hypersexualized and deviant. Both had their pros and cons. More people were treated with actual equality under matriarchy than patriarchy. I'm not for or against either system. each tribe knows whats best for them.
@bamesjond0069 can't say that for my dad my friend. Can't say that for ever guy who wifed up a virgin who ended up leaving him either. it comes down to the character of the woman not their past. the past only affects them if they never resolved those issues. Sometimes you can be that person that is special enough to get her through her trauma and she'll fall in love with you for it too. lets not pretend humans are simple creatures.
@t-8900 look at how many women fail at building seccessful relationships
@t-8900 non virgins were once virgins. I will definitely become one after marriage. If being a non virgin has good sides I will be glad for getting them with my husband.
@marish01 and men don't? XDsorry but if the average number of partners a man has is 8 before marriage then that means 7/8 ended in failure. that means the majority of relationships men had were failures. And that's not even counting weather his marriage is going to last or not. The only success is the one that's there at the end. So in general you can say that people just suck at picking partners.
@t-8900 well as an alpha patriarchal man seeking to make his own group (family) i have decided virgins are highly superior. I dont see why thats such a big deal... you're a man, what do you care of my preferences? And if some slutty women think im a misogynist what do they care? Presumably they wouldn't want to be with me just as much. The real issue is that the same slutty women who call me a misogynist are the same ones who try and date me and fuck me all the time. This is why this topic is so heated in general. Everyone plays nice except the slutty women. I have no complaints, i can sleep around with hoes and marry a virgin. you're a man who can make his own dating preferences, mine have zero effect on you... shit if anything it takes me out of the dating pool so im not even competing with you for that cute girl who has a body count of 8. The girls who are virgins are happy some men value their decision. Good for them. The only people who get upset are the girls sleeping around. They want to change men who value virginities minds, and influence them to date girls who sleep around. They are the primary people with a problem about this whole situation. So they are the ones who really need to just stfu and not have a contradictory lifestyle of both wanting to sleep around AND date men who dont like girls who sleep around. How silly it is to try to do both things, lmao.
@t-8900 i did say that. I did mention men.
@marish01 okay and even the other people arguing agreed when i said a girl in her late 20's or 30's still being a virgin is weird. and as I said i bet girls like you are almost impossible to get a marriage with once you are in your 30's with no sexual past. You dont relate and you also get even more picky. I don't know many who are going to stick around and date for 2-3 years to figure out that aspect after. Sorry it's unreasonable. If you want to say its because of religion well people in those times married in their teens, they didn't wait their whole lives to get the lay. Whats more biblical scholars like Martin Luther pointed out that most people in general were not virgins before marriage and it was unreasonable and almost impossible to expect a woman to be chaste before marriage and that's back in the 1500's. This prudish behavior imho is not healthy and certainly not natural. Not to mention that you being in your 30's without knowing all the fun stuff and how to really please him from the start is gonna make you seem lame imho. I can't imagine a girl just always wanting to lay on her back and have me do all the work, not be sexually adventurous, just kill me now I'll take the non-virgin at that pointy tyvm lol.
@t-8900 you seem highly obsessed with getting a middle aged woman for physical attraction reasons. Its literally one point on a list of why i greatly prefer younger women. And who gets married assuming it won't last long? Smh. Better marry a 30 year old so o can get her at the exact time she's most desireable to me at the expense of 10 years of attraction... smh what a way to start a marriage. Thats pretty sad.
@bamesjond0069 you make sluts insecure by thinking they are not worthy of love and marriage. I've never seen anyone so zealous about any topics as sluts are about this whole virginity thing
@bamesjond0069 its okay I currently have multiple sexual partners and am happy with it. You talk about "alpha males" and being one. I would say that being an alpha is highly subjective. Imho an Alpha is highly competitive in general and usually doesn't settle on one. The reason being that he makes sure his seed spreads far and wide and his bloodline is secured with genetic variation. I have exclusivity among a group of women who know me so I'm not worried about who you date. I dont like the double standards however and will call you out for them. If she's a slut, you're a slut, and that's just something you need to get your hand around. And if being a slut makes you trashy then so are you.
@t-8900 "I can't imagine a girl just always wanting to lay on her back and have me do all the work, not be sexually adventurous..." not trying to be a dick but thats your failing as a lover. Virgins go wild for sex if you can be a good teacher and are down for anything. Its experienced girls that have all the hangups. Ie "i was anally raped and it hurt im never doing that again" ugh what man wants to wade through that trauma and play therapist and hear about another man mistreating your girl just to stick it up her ass? Smh.
@bamesjond0069 I've never had that issue with promiscuous women in my life guy lol. And when she already knows that's better imho but to each their own.
@bamesjond0069 not to mention i'm not teaching a 30 y. o. how to do things imho she should already know how to do.
@t-8900 "I have exclusivity among a group of women who know me so I'm not worried about who you date. I dont like the double standards however and will call you out for them." And how is that not a double standard? I dont particularly care but thats hilarious you care so much about me having a "double standard" when you have one as well. Why dont you be exclusive to a woman who sleeps with lots of men? Smh. Really neither is a double standard at all and quite ridiculous.
@bamesjond0069 men who attack you for prefering virgins feel insecure about their non virgin girlfriend's past.
@bamesjond0069 because i never called these women sluts or tried to insinuate the are somehow bad partners/lovers. You'd be a fool to jump to such conclusions. One of them HAS slept with a lot of men. I never said I was exclusive did I? But if I was I wouldn't much care either. I'm not picking girls on age I'm picking them on how we click on a personal level. Besides it was her idea, she was bi curious and gets off to it. So what's the deal exactly? Consenting adults are just that. I'm not trashing people for their sexual past but I'll trash someone who trashes them for it. I see nothing wrong with that one bit. You're saying people are lesser for having had multiple partners, yet you have had multiple partners. and thus you want/expect something you might not even truly deserve and do not practice what you preach. that's the difference here.
@marish01 no one has a problem with him preferring virgins. Just like it's fine if a woman likes virgin guys. To say that virgin girls are not just his preference, but superior... that is the problem. They are not. In any capacity.
@marish01 exactly. They have to justify that their girlfriend or wife isn't of a lower value than mine. They want to be proud of something like its a rare jewel but its not. Its honestly as pathetic as taking a rusty old civic to a ferarri car show and then acting like you would challenge anyone to a race. How stupid.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 do you attack the same way at guys who say non virgins are superior?I doubt itPrefering non virgins is welcomed.Prefering virgins is condemned.
@bamesjond0069 comparing a human being to cars just highlights that you really are a PoS buddy. have a nice day I'm out.
@t-8900 people use analogies a lot to explain their stance. Nothing wrong with it.
@t-8900 men are NOT judged when they prefer non virgin women over virgin ones but men are judged when they prefer virgin women over non virgin ones? Why?
@marish01 I am not attacking anyone. I am defending non virgins. Not attacking who prefers virgins. Virgins are not shamed by society. Non virgins are. Terms like slut and whore prove that.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 how are you defending sluts by attacking men who prefer virgins over non virgins as their girlfriends?
@marish01 again, I am not attacking anyone. And thank you for proving my point by calling non virgins sluts.
"Not to mention that you being in your 30's without knowing all the fun stuff and how to really please him from the start is gonna make you seem lame imho."Everyone who is not a virgin explored that stuff I will too. But unlike them I will ecplore it with my husband. I better exploring it with him than with other men.
Honestly I'm just going to say y'all calling my girlfriend a slut need to tone down your shit and be more respectful. Sh treats people with courtesy and decency. We help others in need so y'all can save the judgement. You don't know me and you do know what we do and how we do it. Bet I've do more for local communities than both of you combined. Don't try to get all moralistic over keeping it in your pants.
@t-8900 are you turned on by imagining how other men smashed her?You are happy you're not the only men who explored her body, right?
@t-8900 I am glad I will explore sex with my husband. It is so empowering to know my body will be explored only by the man I will love. It is such a turn on to explore his.Other men's bodies are useless for me. Only my man's matter. The only body that I am eager to touch.
You sound A sexual tbh
@t-8900 why would you be offended by the word slut? If sleeping around is so great and its your preference shouldn't it be a compliment? you're the one making it a diss. Im stating it as a fact. A slut is generally understood to be a woman who sleeps around and/or has casual sex. I think deep down you know its bad and thats why you're offended. You can call me a motorcycle lover as a diss but since i dont believe motorcycles are bad i won't get offended.
"i bet girls like you are almost impossible to get a marriage with once you are in your 30's with no sexual past. "No man. It means I am more likely to be happily married. Your theory is wrong because having sex with past lovers makes those women lose their value on intimacy and love.In your country most women in their 30s have sexual past yet more than half if them are unable to save their marriages.This proves your theory is wrong.Most women I know were virgins before marriage. Almost all of them are still happily married
No it's because that woman is amazing and she's my heart and frankly if you called her that in my presence your own woman would be stuck holding your hand in a hospital bed for the next week while you relearn to walk all over again cupcake 😊
@t-8900 did you tag your girlfriend?
@marish01 yes he did.
@Funnygirl1500 I wish you guys your love become more intense than ever.
@t-8900 wow great way to prove me wrong. So you do know deep down something is wrong with it.
@bamesjond0069 nope I do no that people who talk ish about people I love by objectifying them start an intimate love affair with my fists and possible a lead pipe ^^
@t-8900 but if being a slut was good why you mad bro?
@bamesjond0069 1) Because what you define as a slut is someone who had sex before marriage. that's not a slut. 2) Because you OBJECTIFIED MY GIRL BRO! I grew up in a rough neighborhood. People got shot for that shit. Not me, I'm not like that. But I got a quick temper, I'm sicilian. I dont tolerate that shit.
@t-8900 thats not what i said but ok. Whats a slut to you? And how is that objectifying your girl and why would that even be bad? No big talk and posturing required its the internet so punch your computer all you like lmao
@bamesjond0069 bro you literally used an analogy on women being objects with your rust car reference. When you talk porn stars and prostitutes, those are sluts. Just because a woman has had sex doesn't make her a slut. She could have had like 2-3 partners for all you know but you're gonna assume the worst possible outcome because a flap of skin is broken. And you're also going to hold women to a higher standard then yourself. Idc what you reasoning for it is. they're human beings dude. They have urges same as guys and sometimes far stronger. You're okay with using them as f meat until you find "the one" and kicking the rest to the curb like they're nothing. You're okay with keeping your piece wet but you want a girl who can't have any fun at all. It's completely wrong and unreasonable and in a way a rejection of their humanity. I dont tolerate that, especially if it's going to involve someone i love in any way, shape, or form. And on top of that you have NO IDEA why she's not a virgin. I wasn't a virgin. Hell I lost it WAY before you did, get me now? So I dont want to hear some bullshit about a non-virgin just being a slut. That's totally f'd.
@t-8900 but if those women give consent to sex with him then why is thos an issue?
@marish01 right so as i stated context is everything. however he was making blanket statements. and in our messages i said it's very different in romantic/committed relationships then not. And it doesn't take away the fact that they're human beings and should not be used in reference to objects. You as a Christian should know better. Lastly I also shared the differences in lived experiences. You said my life would have probably made you into something far worse than what these girls are.
@t-8900 I was exagerrating but definitely my choice of abstinence comes from being a beloved child. I value family a lot
@t-8900 they give consent to sexual objectification
@marish01 so do a lot of people. I value family too. but mental abuse does take it's toll. Pulling somebody back from the abyss and turn their life around for the better is definitely very rewarding.
@t-8900 I would never give consent to sex without love. I know I deserve love
@marish01 who said these non-virgins didn't love they person they were with? Also I don't know about you but here we have a lot sexually predatory men. I'm not going to mention names here but I have plenty of female friends on here that were forced or tricked into it. Many men are sick bastards.
No. It’s because I have enough healthy self respect for myself and boundaries for my body.
I am MORE than my body. If people want to objectify themselves, that’s great. It’s them. But it’s not me. I I’m confident that I’m a virgin and I don’t really care what anyone else thinks of me for it. Intimacy in relationships can mean sex but not always.
@Rachel794 do you also think men should pay for all the dates and stuff? and from which nation do you hail from?
@t-8900 an analogy is what set you off? I didn't say a woman WAS a car. Lmfao. Nobody is angry here except you.
@Rachel794 you're awesome! An actual strong confident woman! Love it.
@bamesjond0069 im not gonna say much more than you just dont get me. I got my reasons and i dont like people being compared to objects and i got more than enough reasons and all of them good ones. But yeah you were all-inclusive about non-virgins. A blanket statement without reason for why they aren't virigins. A non-virgin doesn't mean she went out and had randoms at the night club every weekend nor does it mean she had lots of partners. Without context dont just act like they're all hooker tier girls, that's not honest and it's not fair.
@bamesjond0069 Thank you :)
@t-8900 if you actually read what i wrote i said 3 or less men. But i think you're too angry to read what im writing. In general ill say less is always better than more so virgin is best case scenario but i didn't discount girls who had one or two or even three serious boyfriends. I did say any girl that ever had any casual sex though was not acceptable... ie ONS or fuck buddy.
@bamesjond0069 i can agree mostly. If she's had one casual fling and then regretted it that's different. Sorry I am currently going through paxil withdrawal its got me on edge atm.
@bamesjond0069 have you hung around a lot of women as friends? Have you seen their interactions with lots of dudes or is it limited to you and maybe your buddies?
@t-8900 i dont think regretting a hookup is acceptable. Lots of drug addicts regret doing drugs and it has absolutely no influence on if they continue to use drugs. Sometimes you taste something and just can't ever go back to normal.
@bamesjond0069 right that's not what i'm talking about. she does it once and refrains from ever doing it again. And because i did that i can forgive that. Maybe you think a woman has to exceed you in personal strength and meet certain expectations that you yourself would fail? But if so that doesn't make you an "alpha male" bro. that would actually make you a weaker person for not being able to deal with someone making a mistake. That's arrogance not strength.
@bamesjond0069 and then i wonder what happens if a poor girl was abducted and raped over and over for a long period of time. You would dump her for that? You wouldn't consider making her a wife for that? These are questions that will get to the core of the type of individual you are.
Good, I’m happy I have mental and psychological issues because I’m a virgin 😡🤬😡😡😡😡😡 Thank you for being so judgmental to virgins like me.
@t-8900 "Maybe you think a woman has to exceed you in personal strength and meet certain expectations that you yourself would fail?" For a man to have casual sex its not a mistake. For a woman to have casual sex its a big mistake.When it comes to your rape scenario I've met girls that have been raped and they moved on and it has had little bearing on their life. But most girls I've met who have been raped are permanently fucked from it. So that would disqualify a girl if she had serious emotional baggage.
@bamesjond0069 I dont agree sorry. it makes no sense that one human can have all the sex they want and the other has no right to it. Sounds like the female is an object to you more than a person. That's how it's coming off.
@Rachel794 ah i see what you're saying. In MY EXPERIENCE it's been the case that they do to some degree. I dont know your story so I won't say you do or not. But all the ones I've personally talked to or tried to date were impossible. They had a superiority complex and I didn't like it. They would trash their exes at the dinner table randomly for one. and I frankly dont like listening to people trash others at a dinner table. I also had one act extremely cocky listing off all the things had to be to marry her. So I said I felt it was better we parted ways. I dont like a superiority complex.
I *LOVE* my girlfriend and her not being a virgin is not going to change those feelings for her. I'm not a virgin either. I'm an extremely flawed person and i have WAAAAY more emotional baggage than she does. She accepted me for who I am, she treats me special, she talks to me special, that's way more important than if she's a virgin or not. I actually dont mind people with baggage because I've had one seriously F'd up life. I I'm not gorgeous, I dont make tons of money, I've had 2 mental breakdowns in my life, and she sees the good in me, she sees the value in me and THAT is far more important than if she still has an intact hymen. THAT is the type of thing you need for a lasting relationship.
@t-8900 it makes absolute sense. Do you judge a dog by the standards of a cat? Or a cat by the standards of a dog? How ridiculous to point at a german shepard and say look at my freakish ginormous retarded cat. Men and women are not the same thing and its ridiculous to judge a woman by man standards and vice versa. There are tons and tons of things that are "double standards" if you were to do such a thing. But of course you only care about this one and none of the others that you personally make use of.
@bamesjond0069 first you used an analogy of cars now 2 different species. do you see why your analogies dont work? start studying human evolution and psychology. once you've delved your realize how ridiculous you sound.
@bamesjond0069 give me some double standards i make use of
@marish01 Lol. You really have no idea what a confident man is then. And no surprise, because you are deeply inexperienced in engagement with the most profound aspects of male bodies and psychology. A confident man appreciates his and his woman's sexuality. He is not afraid of other men, because he doesn't perceive them as a threat to him. The kind of guy who freaks out and get insecure because a woman had past lovers is deeply, deeply insecure.
@marish01 Also, you're using the word "slut" incorrectly. A slut is a person who has indiscriminate sex, male or female. Bamesjond0069 is a slut and happily admits it. Most non-virgins are not sluts. They are simply women who have a healthy sexuality. Unlike 31 year old virgins who are trying to use incorrect language to mask the fact that they have psychological issues and sexual blockage.
@marish01 You ask :What should my non virgin husband's views on my virginity to be for him not to be misogynistic?He should think I should have had sex with others?LolIs that what you think would be a man worthy of me?Your non-virgin husbands views should be healthy respect for all women and non-hypocrisy - ie. if he has a sexual history, he shouldn't be a hypocrite and think that all women should not have one. That would make him non-misogynistic. Does that mean he needs you to have had sex with others? Of course not. What an illogical comment.
Bamesjond0069 - I've come to the conclusion you are a terrible human, and would be an atrocious lover and partner. You are a slut. You are a hypocrite, you reveal that you have no desire to have an adult relationship where people can work together to grow and heal. Instead, you want some kind of imagined blow up doll blank slate to mould as you will - or in your words just to "stick it up her ass". What a shallow and disgusting PoS you really are. It's super creepy. You are super creepy. And super shallow. You clearly have deep sexual dysfunction. You're just not mentally or sexually well.
Not wanting his wife to have had other men before him means he respects himself enough and values his intimacy with his eoman enough to want her to belong only to him.A man who has a positive view pn his woman"s intimacy with other men is a man with no backbone.You are bitter. I know. That is why you hope I have psyvhologival issues. Only a mentally healthy woman values her body to the point that she believes only the man who will spend his life with him deserves to touch her body. You didn't answer my question correctly.I asked what his views on my virginity should be. I didn't ask what his views on other women's sexual past should be. Look you are so insecure that you are triggered very easily and you made my question about you when it was about me. You got triggered by thinking that my hypothetical husband appreciates my virginity because this leaves you insecure about your own past. What does my husband have to do with you? Lol why does his appreciation for my virginity makes you insecure? your insecurity is blatant here. you just showed it.
When a man prefers a virgin over non virgin and when a virgin woman embaces her virginity this triggers deeply insecure women.
@marish01 "Not wanting his wife to have had other men before him means he respects himself enough and values his intimacy with his eoman enough to want her to belong only to him." What an absurd and convoluted position. If he values intimacy so much, and believes that the value of intimacy is connected to lack of sexual experience, he should also remain a virgin. If there was a virgin man who did this, I could respect that perspective. But what we are talking about here is slutty men with no respect for women or intimacy, who hypocritically demand lack of sexual experience in their wives, while providing none of the same. This is not a man who respects himself or women. It is an entitled, arrogant and hypocritical person who will make a terrible husband. "A man who has a positive view pn his woman"s intimacy with other men is a man with no backbone." - no, a man who is hypocritical has no backbone, and no integrity. A man who believes women's sexual experience is somehow a detriment (while not believing the same of himself, and actively whoring around, thereby contributing to the state of affairs - ie. women existing who have sexual experience - which he faux-moralistically pretends to be above). This is a man who has no comprehension of sexuality, of love or of value. He has a fearful and controlling mentality, and again he is a raging hypocrite.
"You are bitter. I know. That is why you hope I have psyvhologival issues. Only a mentally healthy woman values her body to the point that she believes only the man who will spend his life with him deserves to touch her body." This is laughable. I have been a virgin, and I have also had sexual experience. You are a virgin, yet you have never had sexual experience - which at your age is a huge psychological red flag - yet you believe you have knowledge of this realm. You don't. You are ignorant and inexperienced, yet you posture knowledge. It's laughable. I adore and love my body. My sexual experiences have been the most sacred and beautiful experiences of my life. Fetishizing your virginity is not self love. It's repression. You are denying your body the most natural and sacred experience, which is literally life giving... and you project your own prudish bitterness upon me because I embody life wisdom which you do not.
You said: <<<<"You didn't answer my question correctly.I asked what his views on my virginity should be. >>>For him to not be misogynistic, his views on your virginity should be that he loves you whether you are a virgin or not. His views should be that he sees you as valuable for everything that makes you who you are today.
Also; I'd like to clear something up - when you speak of your 'husband'... are you engaged? Or is this your imagined, hypothetical husband?
I'm not denying anything I just don't feel that anyone I have met deserves to touch my body. No matter how hard you try you can't make me a regret my pure past I'm so glad that I have never had past sex lovers because I'm going to find a man who told me to spend my whole life with. I'm so glad that the experience that I lack as you claim will be gained when having sex with a man that I love. You can't make me a regret that I didn't have them without a man who could be my past lover. I am glad that I have never had them with any other men. I want to be single now and when I find my men I will be gladly explore my body and his. You keep on changing the path A man who doesn't want her woman to have that other man is not a coward or anything connected with fear. He just gets turned off by thinking how are the men touched her which is very logical. If he values my intimacy with him he will appreciate that I chose only him to be intimate with. Why would he wish I had intimacy with other men if he values our intimacy? You changed my statement to fit your narrative. I did not say value intimacy with him is linked to sexual inexperience. You bring up the lack of skills in order to make you feel good about your own past. Valuing intimacy means that he values my CHOICE of him as my first man and that he values my CHOICE of not having intimate moments with other men.The same reason why a man doesn't want to share his wife witt other man when being in relationships. It's not about insecurity. it's about valuing relationship.
@marish01 when men say they prefer a virgin they're really saying YOUNGER WOMEN. It has nothing to do with your hymen hun, ZILCH! If you want to be a virgin, fine. Don't go acting like you're morally superior to a non-virgin. We already talked in PM. You have lived a well off, sheltered life. You couldnt relate to me if you tried. You dont know hardships like I do. I need a woman who does! I need a woman who can relate to my anguish and suffering and help me through it. I need someone who can understand by having lived it. To me its SEXY when a woman has had shit happen in her life that relates to me. I gravitate to such women because we are kindred spirits. You couldnt heal me if you tried because your mind is hung up on a skin flap that you forgot about the damn inner workings of a relationship. My mother was a virgin, her marriage failed. My aunts and uncles were not. THEY didn't FAIL! There is so much more to it then the sexual aspect. The sexual aspect plays like at most 2-3% of the marriage.
I did say hypothetical.So you clearly said he shouldn't appreciate my choice of him as my first and only man.🤦🏻♀️Why?Because this hurts you?How rational is it to say he should not care that I saved myself for him?-I saved myself for you because I decided to have sex only with the man I desire. That is my husband. I chose you because I love you.-Okay but I don't care. You could choose other men.Does this response of his sound rational?
@marish01 Your commentary is so convoluted I am not going to reply to it. Rephrase things in a logical manner and I will. You are welcome to be single and not have sex. That is your choice. However, you must admit that at 31, and with no future partner anywhere in sight... it is odd you have never met someone who you wish to marry or have a deeper intimate relationship with. Alongside your insistence that you are "pure", and your attempt to demonize and shame women with sexual experience, I think this demonstrates you are ideologically possessed. Therefore, there is nothing pure about you compared to a woman with sexual experience. Being moralistic and ideologically possessed is actually toxic and impure. There are many women with sexual experience who are much more pure than you in terms of their capacity to respect other people.
Also, I am not trying to get you to regret you past. I am simply saying that you are not in a position to pass judgement on realms of human experience you have no experience of. Do what you want in your own life. But don't pretend you are better than anyone for it. You're absolutely not. And you may be worse simply because you incorrectly believe you are.
You can understand what I mean I don't think you were that dense. You just skip commenting on my points when you feel attacked and insecure. You hope I will never have a future husband because I haven't had ex lovers. This is so stupid. What will make my marriage successful will be the values that made me deny sex with other men.My purity offends you since you claim that women with sexual experience are more pure than me. Looks like you want to think that.
@marish01 your literal question: A virgins a better choice?I am telling you that's not how it works for marriages. A better choice for what? WHAT? For a sexual fantasy about being the first? Sure! But everything else? NO! I honestly can't even imagine waiting like 2-3 years paying for all the dinners, catering to your every want/desire and then having to wait till the wedding night. by the way the guy here in this thread? Unironically didn't WAIT to pop her cherry did he? See that's the damn thing. All the guys saying they want a virgin but not waiting to pop the cherry for the wedding night. And then they go to the next one when they're tired of her. They manipulated a girl's hopes and dreams and ran off with them leaving her behind. And then we have you, a 31 yo virgin. If the virginity mattered so much you'd have already popped babies. Why can't you get this through your head? These aren't the days of old. Marriages aren't arranged anymore. People dont get married at like 15 anymore after knowing each other for like 5 days. It's unrealistic and naive.
@marish01 "I did say hypothetical.So you clearly said he shouldn't appreciate my choice of him as my first and only man.🤦♀️Why? Because this hurts you?" The fuck? I never said that. You're literally making up sentences which I never said, and you accuse ME of being irrational. You're a nutbag, honey. Certified crazy. And can't string a logical train of thought together."How rational is it to say he should not care that I saved myself for him?"I didn't fucking say that, lunatic."I saved myself for you because I decided to have sex only with the man I desire. That is my husband. I chose you because I love you.-Okay but I don't care. You could choose other men.Does this response of his sound rational? "No it doesn't. But I never said it did. It should be more along the lines of: "I saved myself for you" "That's beautiful, I love you"! OR in the event of the person not being a virgin, he wouldn't care!! Because he loves them regardless.
What should his view on my choice of him as my first man be?Not caring?Really?
@marish01 are you seeing anyone now? Is it serious? How long have you been with him?
You said: "You hope I will never have a future husband because I haven't had ex lovers. This is so stupid. What will make my marriage successful will be the values that made me deny sex with other men. My purity offends you since you claim that women with sexual experience are more pure than me. Looks like you want to think that." >>>Again, the actual fuck? I never said I hope you don't have a husband. Actually, I hope you DO get one - soon - so you realize (once you gain a little life experience) that you're talking shit.Your purity doesn't "offend" me. Because it doesn't exist. You're not pure. You are deluded, which is impure.
At first you said he shouldn't care whether I'm virgin or not. This means my choice of saving myself for him should be reacted the same way my choice of having sexual ecperience with others in case I had that past.This does mean being indifferent for being my first man
@marish01 Why do you keep repeating your questions. I already answered them. I never said he "shouldn't care" if you saved yourself for him. If he loves you, he will think that's beautiful. AND if you were not a virgin, it wouldn't bother him - he would love you the same. Assuming he is sexually experienced himself, THAT is what a man who is not a hypocritical misogynist would think.
@marish01 by the way is the first things out of your mouth with each new guy "I'm a virgin" or do you actually get to know each other first. If its not the first things out of your mouth then my point remains that it's not the defining factor in a relationship. And if it is the first things out of your mouth then ewwww, CRINGE. So either way i have no idea where this idea of purity comes from. Are you sinless? If not your aren't "pure". its really that simple
@t-8900 She said she is single. This "husband" is her hypothetical future husband.
Beautiful? In what sense?
@marish01 You said <<< "At first you said he shouldn't care whether I'm virgin or not. This means my choice of saving myself for him should be reacted the same way my choice of having sexual ecperience with others in case I had that past.This does mean being indifferent for being my first man>>>"You've interpreted this incorrectly. I said it shouldn't matter to him whether you are a virgin or not, if he loves you. However, if you are a virgin, he will appreciate the qualities of you which had you make that decision. And if you are not a virgin, he will appreciate the qualities of you which had you make that decision not to be. He will not be "indifferent" - he will be full of love, regardless of if you are a virgin or not. That is what a man who loves a woman actually does. Let me give you an analogy. If I truly love a man, it is not because of superficial things like whether he is a virgin, or how much money he makes. If I love a man deeply, it won't matter if he is an artist with a low salary or a banker with a high salary. I won't care about his job - not in the sense that I am callous to his qualities, but in the sense that no matter what his job is, I appreciate the deeper qualities of him that arrived him at that job. So similarly, a good husband will not care if a woman is a virgin or not - he is more interested in her deeper qualities.
@NicoletteXO which is my EXACT point. She's such a catch with that virginity she's single at 31, no prospects, no ring. This is the shit I'm trying to drill through her head smfh
Except saving myself for him is not superficial
@marish01 save yourself if you want, that's not getting you a wedding ring.
@marish01 Beautiful in the same sense that it would be beautiful if you went to a lot of effort to make him a cake. He would appreciate the beauty of your attempt to do something in the hope that it will make him feel special.It's not beautiful because it's virginity.
"He will not be "indifferent" - he will be full of love, regardless of if you are a virgin or not."He will be indifferent for our intimacy if he doesn't care that I chose to share intimacy only with him.Saving myself for just one man whom I will marry does show my value of love and intimacy. It also shows my family and moral values.
@t-8900 Exactly. Sexual repression messes with people's heads (as does wanton, indiscriminate sex).Because she does not enjoy healthy sexuality, she has to cling to an egoic ideology of purity and 'saving herself'. There is so much weight and heaviness in this. I would get it if she had these ideas at 19. But at 31, at what point do you accept that you're not really making a moral choice and it's likely you have a sexual blockage?
It's a little bit like an incel judging "women's whoreish behaviour". Like, the reality is they're only judging because they can't get none, and it makes them feel some sense of validation and false superiority, since underneath they are suffering deeply and achingly lonely.
I don't repress myself. I simply haven't found a man who is good enough to turn me on.What would expect me to do at 31?At age 31 I should have slept with random men?At age 31 I should have dated men without having feelings for them?
Are these the moral choice you were refering to?
"He will not be "indifferent" - he will be full of love, regardless of if you are a virgin or not."He will be indifferent for our intimacy if he doesn't care that I chose to share intimacy only with him.Honey - this just shows how lacking in understanding of intimacy you truly are. You've never experienced intimacy, so you don't have a clue. And please, stop twisting my point. I never said he will be indifferent to your intimacy based on your choice to 'save yourself for him' - I said, he would meet that with great love and appreciation! And if you were not a virgin, he would meet you with great love and appreciation! In either case, a man who loves you is profoundly invested in your intimacy. You really seem to be utterly psychologically possessed.
Lol you think I can't get men?Really?You are delusional.I did say I've never met a man who would be good enough for me to see him as my potentional husband.
@marish01 "I don't repress myself. I simply haven't found a man who is good enough to turn me on.What would expect me to do at 31?At age 31 I should have slept with random men?At age 31 I should have dated men without having feelings for them?"Stop fucking making crazy imputations.At age 31, it is ODD that you have not met a man who is "good enough to turn you on" - unless a person lives in an extremely remote area with no access to the internet and extraordinarily limited capacity to meet men, then the problem is not with the men. It is with YOU. If no man you have ever met since legal age (so, more than a decade) has been good enough to turn you on, your 'turn on' is blocked! There is something awry with your libido.What is it that would turn you on, that is absent in every single man you have ever met?
@marish01 "Lol you think I can't get men?Really?You are delusional.I did say I've never met a man who would be good enough for me to see him as my potentional husband." So then... where's your fucking husband?
"He would appreciate the beauty of your attempt to do something in the hope that it will make him feel special."You don't understand what I explained for several times.You make it sound as if saving myself for him means I sacrifice my urges for other men (the reality is I don't desire other men). Now you made another wrong interpretation. You make it sound as if I save myself in order to make him feel special and not because I value our intimacy.I did say for several times that I value MY INTIMACY WITH HIM. That is why I feel disgust for the idea of sex with men who will be just past lovers. I want sex only with the man I will marry.
@marish01 Ok. If that's how you feel, that's how you feel. I wonder if you've had some kind of trauma (like unwanted sexual touching when you were too young to remember) to arrive you at this place. But whatever, you're entitled to an opinion. But what is incorrect is the assertion that you are more 'pure' than others for it - you're not. And I do find it super odd that you still don't have that husband, after all this time.
"this just shows how lacking in understanding of intimacy you truly are"Then explain what intimacy is that makes it absolutely worthy of being shared with multiple men.My views on intimacy are that intimacy is very specialSpecial to ths point that I want to share it with only one man.Yet you claim this view on intimacy is not healthy.I have high standards. Very high. I will choose only one man. Therefore I can't have low standards.So should he not think that saving myself for martiage shows my values on marriage, family, love and intimacy when it clearly does
"So then... where's your fucking husband?"Haven't met him yet. He can't be a random guy
"If that's how you feel, that's how you feel. I wonder if you've had some kind of trauma (like unwanted sexual touching when you were too young to remember:Never. No sexual abuse. No mental abuse. No physical abuse. No bullying. No bad experience.That is why I have so much enthusiasm for love and marriage.
@marish01 Intimacy IS special. But just as a mother can love all her children (and this doesn't diminish the love for each individual child), a person can have many experiences of intimacy, without this diminishing anything at all. In fact, mostly it enhances those experiences.The thing is you need to EXPERIENCE intimacy for you to understand what it entails. Like, if you had never experienced true love, I could give you every single academic paper on the nature of love, and still you would be ignorant. Because you need more than an explanation, you need direct and personal experience. Which you don't have. And I hope you find it soon. Until then, do not denounce or make presumptions around matters you are not experienced in.
"So then... where's your fucking husband?"Haven't met him yet. He can't be a random guyNobody is suggesting he should be random. But you have had more than a decade to find him. And you don't think it's odd that you haven't yet? I think it's very odd."If that's how you feel, that's how you feel. I wonder if you've had some kind of trauma (like unwanted sexual touching when you were too young to remember:Never. No sexual abuse. No mental abuse. No physical abuse. No bullying. No bad experience.That is why I have so much enthusiasm for love and marriage.I wouldn't be so sure. That's why I said, it could be that something happened to you when you were too young to remember. Because your behaviour and psychology is very unusual. And there might be a deeper cause.
You think if I experience intimacy my views on it will change and I will cravy intimacy with other men?Did you intentionally ignore my comment? I explained to you that sexual intimacy
@NicoletteXO imagine going your who life thinking a flap of skin determine the whole future of your life. I just can't. This is what I mean she's actually lost it from the lack of sex. I've talked to women. They NEED SEX lol. Her quote: "I simply haven't found a man who is good enough to turn me on."^ I said this before she's fucking A Sexual, NOT NORMAL! It doesn't take much to turn a girl on. She needs to get her hormone levels checked stat! She's 31 going 32 right? She threw her best years away on what? WHAT? She could have lived her life but she threw her youth away! Maybe she should date a 50-60 year old? I can't see a normal guy going for this girl and I'm being as nice as I can about it. Literally having sexual experience by now WOULD have given her an edge on the younger girls because she would know how to touch a man, make him get all jittery inside with experience. I had a friend, his mom was around 42ish and I was 22. She had me more turned on then my peers BECAUSE SHE WAS SOOOOOOOO GOOD WITH TOUCH! She turned around at a party, with just her head y'know? Backed her body up to mine and gave me that sexy look an experienced woman had. She kissed me on the cheek then gently bit my lip and pulled it and made a little moan noise. Virgin women can't do this! They don't have that knowledge of getting a guy turned on. I bet that'd have been like the best sex I would have had in decades ngl! hahaha! But I was such a Christian prude at the time! if i could go back and do it all over again I WOULD HAVE! I REGRET IT ALL! I REGRET WAITING!
That sexual intimacy is special to me to the point that I want to share only with the man I love.Yet you claim my views on intimacy are wrong/unhealthy.Lol do you even understand what intimacy is?
@marish01 Yes, I do. I have experienced profound love. It sounds like you never have. This is very sad for you, and you are projecting.
You brought up mother's love for all his children to justify your views on thinking intimacy with multiple men is true intimacy and that my views on intimacy only with one man are incorrect.🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️Girl are you aware that we are talking about sexual intimacy.Of course you are. I can't believe you have such perverted views on love. Yet you advise me to read books about love.
"That sexual intimacy is special to me to the point that I want to share only with the man I love"yep A sexual confirmed. RIP
@t-8900 hahaha love this. And yes, I think she is either asexual or just sexually blocked. Definitely something wrong. She had made sexuality into something both greater and lesser than it is. She just needs experience. She's ignorant. And she's never had sex with someone she loves! This is deeply sad.
@t-8900 A new definition for asexual- someone who wants to be sexually intimate with only one partner😂🤦🏻♀️
And she's never had sex with someone she loves! This is deeply sad.And you had sex with love?😂If you had you wouldn't say I am ignorant for wanting sexual intimacy with only the man I love.
@marish01 "You brought up mother's love for all his children to justify your views on thinking intimacy with multiple men is true intimacy and that my views on intimacy only with one man are incorrect.🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️Girl are you aware that we are talking about sexual intimacy.Of course you are. I can't believe you have such perverted views on love. Yet you advise me to read books about love."Yes, I am aware. You asked me to explain why it is possible to have sexual intimacy with more than one person, and for it to still be special. I'm using an analogy, imbecile. To try to explain the depth of feeling. To suggest that humans are capable of having deep and profound connection, and that does not have to be limited to one person. The fact that you even raise perversion here means you yourself are perverted. And here we come to the crux of your sexual problem. You believe sex - other than in some very particular and narrowly defined realm - is impure or perverted. You are deeply ignorant, and deeply afraid of sex. Otherwise, you would be married and sexually active already. But you're not, and you feign morality because you are missing something in your life.
@marish01 en.wikipedia.org/.../Asexuality^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^READAlso you expect too much for what you can actually offer. If you were 21 instead of 31 that'd be different. My advice? There's plenty of lonely men in the retirement home with low libidos if that's more your thing? They'll give you the world but they'll be dead in like 5 years. At least you might get some inheritance and a kid out of it though. Now realistically? You're bracket is the late 40's hun. Go look for a 48 year old guy who's sex drive has died down a bit so he has the patience to deal with your hang ups. I can't imagine waiting for marriage anymore. I'm glad that ship has sailed an is never coming back!
@t-8900 "That sexual intimacy is special to me to the point that I want to share only with the man I love" Asexual confirmed?Please define asexual.🤦🏻♀️
@marish01 i sent the link, read it. Your libido is in the gutter. Guys your age won't go for it, sorry. Nor will guys 3-4 years younger than you. Start dating up 48-56. that's now your dating age bracket. Maybe one will be patient enough to wait as his T levels drop down the tube. You say you want to wait to find love for sex. That doesn't mean marriage then. if you haven't ever had love there's something very wrong with you.
@marish01 "And she's never had sex with someone she loves! This is deeply sad.And you had sex with love?If you had you wouldn't say I am ignorant for wanting sexual intimacy with only the man I love."Of course I have - it is the most sacred experience possible. The fact that you presume anyone who is not a virgin didn't have sex with love is bizarre, and more proof of your delusions and ignorance around sex and intimacy.And I did NOT say you are ignorant for wanting sex with a man you love. That's great. I said it is ODD that you haven't found a man to love when you are 31 years old. There is something sexually and psychologically wrong with you - it's obvious.
You called me names that gives me a reason fo expose your perversionThe more you talk the more you make me feel disgust for your past.You never loved. You are not capable of loving a man romantically because you view sexual intimacy as something that should be shared with multiple men. Yuck.Your man must be proud to know how special your other lovers are for you. Does he get turned on by watching them share intimacy?You are a lower than average woman. Nothing special. So many men can have you. EwwwwNot to mention you compared this to the intimacy a mother feels for his children. Yuck.You're sick.
@t-8900 offering me a low quality man proces how butthurt you are that I have high standards.I will be the one who will choose a husband for me not you.
@marish01 Aha - and here your true colours are revealed. The toxicity and impurity of your mind is becoming clear for everyone to see. You speak to women of wisdom and power about realms which you know nothing of. You attempt to malign experiences which you lack. You are alone, sexless, quite mentally unstable and you have never experienced love or sexuality. The 'disgust' you feel is a trick of your ego, because if you could face the truth straight in the eye it would destroy you. You have gone your entire lifetime and never experienced the most sacred thing possible. I have.
I did not assume anyone who is not a virgin has sex without love.I said it's your views on intimacy that made me think you never had sex with love.
The fact that you think healthy sexuality means someone is lower is what is sick. Please, save your fake moralism. I see you for what you are. A terrified, obtunded, immature, ignorant and delusional freak show. It's pretty clear why you can't find a husband.
You think healthy sexuality is sharing sexual intimacy with multiple partners.YuckDisgusting
@marish01 You have never experienced intimacy (with or without love) so you have no knowledge of it. I said it was the most sacred thing I've ever experienced. There is no basis whatsoever for you assertion. It is founded in nothing other than your desire to want that to be so, because you like to have your own sexlessness affirmed. And you are a toxic person.
lol great read. 🍿🍿🍿It’s amazing how some people are utterly crazy about virginity, especially as a guy does not know if a girl is a virgin or not.Also HUGE RED FLAG a woman in 30’s not being capable of a sexual relationship. That’s a huge risk to get in to a relationship with them, as you do not know how they will react, they could be Asexual and not want or like sex, imagine finding that out after your wedding night.Also the MEOW lot on here will tell you that they want a virgin or low ‘body count’ (hate it) BUT not a woman over 30, as she’s past it.I still hold it’s creepy asking a person if they are a virgin or not when deciding if to date or not.
@marish01 You have never had sex with a man you love, and who loves you. Yet you fake superiority? Ewww disgusting. You're gross.
Lol keep on calling me names. It is my values on intimacy. You think they will change once I experience it. Lol you think I will want to have it with multiple men once I have it. But that is nonsense. I will only want my man more than before. And not other men
And wanting to be with the man I love is not sexlessness or asexuality. I can't believe I have to explain this to a 35 year old woman.
And you had sex with multiple men. You claim it's love.I don't regret for not having exes. Exes give breakups. I am glad I never experienced them
@ChrisMaster69 Yeah this is a shitshow. I can't believe men and women like this exist outside padded cells. Like, how can they be so off their rockers and still function in society at all? Unbelievable. I totally agree with you - a woman or man who is a virgin at 31 is basically screaming "I have sexual blockages and psychological problems". Maybe there could be some incredibly rare counterexamples - like someone being raised in a religious cult away from society... who then broke away from the cult (then of course there would be other issues to deal with). What is so insane is that this woman has convinced herself that her psychological mess is 'purity'. Just wow. I mean, even this ugly bamesjond0069 character is probably not as messed up as her. He's a misogynist, and sounds like he's had shitty sex without love, BUT at least he's not sitting there like Gollum with his "precious" hymen. Jesus Christ.
@ChrisMaster69 women who have had many sexual partners can be single in their 30s.Having had breakups doesn't mean they are more likely to get high quality men. Breakups give emotional baggage which is highly unattractive.I am very picky because I want to choose the best man for me.
@marish01 that is scary as an option for dating a woman. It means the person has zero experience in what it means to be in a relationship, ignore the sex bit, but the entire relationship thing.Leaving socks on the floor, dirty dishes in the sink, who gets to watch what on tv, music, humour.Then the relationship disagreements you get in to that blow up in to stupid arguments, all of that is the huge risk I see with dating someone inexperienced with relationships.A person can be a virgin and still have relationships.Not having them is potentially something else
@marish01 "And you had sex with multiple men. You claim it's love.I don't regret for not having exes. Exes give breakups. I am glad I never experienced them"Because it was love, you imbecilic twat. You are so monumentally afraid of living and life. Your whole existence is a tragedy!
@NicoletteXO breath in breath out and relax.
@ChrisMaster69 Exactly!!! If a guy my age said he was a virgin and had never been in a relationship... unless there was some extraordinary reason why... I'd be like... no fucking way.
It is not surprising that a woman who shares sexual intimacy with multiple men thinks women who want to share sexual intimacy with just one man are mentally sick.You have a slut logic
@marish01 You've never experienced sex or love. You are making assertions based on pure ignorance. You have NO LOGIC.
You definitely want to change my views on intimacy by calling me names. This only makes me feel disgust for the intimacy you offer.You keep on attacking my views on intimacy because you want to change them.
Having sex with love won't change my views on it. I won't crave for sex with others before or after having sex with love.
It is boring to scroll down so many messages to see the new ones.It takes time. Whoever wants to continue talking to me is free to message me.
@marish01 Oh no no honey. Your twisted mentality won't work on me. You fronted up here calling women who are not virgins "sluts", you incorrectly asserted I'd never had sex with love - which is an obscenely incorrect comment. And monumentally ignorant. You yourself have never experienced sex with love. Your reprehensible attempt to couch your sexlessness and psychological disorder as 'purity' is delusional beyond comprehension. You can be a virgin if you want. Nobody's stopping you. But your views on women with healthy sexuality are false and wrong. You have conveniently ignored every single question as to where is your husband? Why have you not met him? Do you not see that after more than a decade, if you haven't connected with a man who is right for you - there is clearly something wrong with you?
@marish01 "Having sex with love won't change my views on it. I won't crave for sex with others before or after having sex with love."This is like saying I know I will prefer chocolate ice cream over vanilla, when you've tasted neither. You haven't had the experience, and you are in no real position to understand it until you have.
@ChrisMaster69 *Inhale, exhale!! But yeah... I mean, it just makes me very sad for society when we have such hatred for women's sexuality floating around like this. Sexuality is beautiful and sacred. It's just so wrong that people who either have no experience of it (this sexless lady above) or ones who have clearly only experienced extremely superficial levels of sexuality (bamesjond) desire to pervert and demean one of the most sacred things in existence.
@marish01 I think we can all agree that there is no reason to be virgin if you are in love. Having sex makes it fun. Casual sex is also fine but don't do it for money. You gotta do it with someone you love. Virgin girls shouldn't be afraid of sex. They should have an open mind about it.
You're trying to talk sense to the senseless.
Well if it makes sense to her I'll be happy for her lol
Pathology makes sense to the pathological.
I can see you both actually defend your own choices. You defend the fact that you are not a virgin and you ask not to be judged from that, which is your right, and bamesjond0069 defends the fact that he is expecting to date a virgin woman, which is his right. The only think I know is that when I fall in love with a woman, the least I'm interested in is how many guys has she dated in the past. Zero? Hundreds? It doesn't matter! It simply isn't a factor that would change my feelings because I am already very passionate for this woman. I had a brief relationship in the past with a 23 year old virgin woman, and I have to say it was one of the most exceptional experiences, although I had no real feelings for her (it was my fault that we split). It was a whole new experience for me to make that tight, nervous woman to open up and free herself. And at the same time it was so boosting to know that she started her sexual life with me. The next ones didn't have this privilege, although I'm perfectly conscient that some of them would be better in bed than me.But the best experience I have was with a woman I was deeply in love with and we had a very beautiful long relationship, loving and honest. And she was way more experienced than me, as she had many previous failed relationships and hundreds of one night stands. But I was in love with her, so her past didn't matter to me.
Deamit first virginity then reigions and spituality, fuck it I dont give shit on how many partners you have had just be loyal to me if thats agreement we come up. Ps. Im pagan, i dont have concept of hell or any other fancy stuff. You live and then you die. Whats happens in the middle gets judged if you really fuck up.
@Juan_Curious its not that simple. When youve been with numerous virgins, girls with just one or two exs and girls with more and more... you can start to piece together the spectrum of your experiences and its quite clear it makes a big difference. I am so sure about my position because I've been with numerous virgins and otherwise good girls and I've also been with some average girls and I've been with lots of strippers and things as well. Im a huge man whore lol. But at the end of the day the less prior sex a girls had the more committed she has been to me. Not that i haven't had girls with huge body counts fall for me but what i mean is the first difficulty comes up they will just cut and run. Thus why they have such a high body count. Where the virgins see the world with rose colored glasses and have dreamt we are a romance movie and will be together forever and they really stick hard to that and will stand by me under any circumstance because they won't ruin their dream that they want more than anything. In terms of a serious 10 20+ year relationship that mindset is better.
@bamesjond0069 But so... your real priority is not about virginity then. It's about the desire to be with a woman who is committed to stick with you through thick and thin.
Which is not a quantifiable quality. One of the best ways to quantify it is through sexual past. All girls as a whole are more committed to man number 1 than man number 2 and more than man number 3... etc. There is a pattern here as a whole.
@bamesjond0069 the question is: are you just as capable of committing to being with a woman through thick and thin?
@NicoletteXO he's made it abundantly clear he lives by double standards and doesn't care about what is morally right. its not about love for him, it's just "his own" body to be used.
What does that matter? Would you tell a fat person they have to accept a fat partner? A tall person they need to date tall? Why does one need to accept someone that is exactly the same situation? Does a poor person have to accept another poor person? None of that makes any sense at all. You are starting with a false assumption that men and women are the same and want the same things. Thats clearly and obviously wrong. If you want a strong man do you yourself need to be a professional boxer or ex military to prefer or even require such a thing? How stupid.
@bamesjond0069 "Would you tell a fat person they have to accept a fat partner?" ummm yes actually because thats LIFE CHOICES! "A tall person they need to date tall?"no because they werent able to chooseokay yes "Accept" for the rest of them. That means respecting them and also being open to possibilities, yes. If you can't do that while you yourself are a lowly slut by your own standards that honestly makes you human fecal matter, nothing more. Your value is limited at that point to what you bring to the table but DEFFO not who you are. You're just a piece of shit at that point
@bamesjond0069 hell even in Christianity you're considered a pos per scripture. it's funny af that even God doesn't find redeeming qualities in a complete hypocrite. For you: Matthew 7:5 ESVYou hypocrite, first take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brother's eye.Romans 2:3 ESV Do you suppose, O man—you who judge those who practice such things and yet do them yourself—that you will escape the judgment of God?For miss i'm so much better than the other girls cuz of my flap:Matthew 6:1 ESV “Beware of practicing your righteousness before other people in order to be seen by them, for then you will have no reward from your Father who is in heaven.one of you is Christian, one of you is not. But since you are both in love with you ideas you can share them together. I for one think you sir are a garbage human being.
Guys why are you still arguing. We are all entitled to have preferences.
@marish01 exactly. I think its retarded he thinks he needs to meet his own preferences to have them. Thats some weird ass gender bending shit. Why tf would a woman want a man similar to her or vice versa? That makes me sick to my stomach thinking about that but whatever floats his boat. I prefer to be as masculine as possible so i can attract someone as feminine as possible... not to attract a masculine woman... wtf. Thats fucking insane and basically what this boils down to. I smoke cigars and shoot guns and am an MMA fighter and those are lifestyle choices... id never accept a woman who made those same choices. Just like the woman i like are opposite and wouldn't accept me being into knitting or feminine things. "Double standards" are the entire point of dating. Without them why even bother? I know i wouldn't.
@bamesjond0069 those are hobbies that have nothing to do with ideology. that's not the same thing. Every analogy you've made this whole time has been a false equivalency. If you can't use a good analogy just dont use them. Admit you're a fucking hypocrite and that you're not able to meet your own morals but expect them from others. Accept that the current woman you are with is more of an adult then you are and accept that she's the better half of the relationship. She's the prize in this one, not you.
@t-8900 but if a woman is fine and if he doesn't pretend to be what he is not then what is your issue. Are you going to threaten her not to be with him cause ig hurts your little ego?
@marish01 I honestly dont care. What's a chick in Armenia to me exactly? Not like I'm hooking up with you either way, nor would I. I just hate hypocrites. by the way your God does too. So it's hilarious you go around claiming to be some chaste christian girl. If you lie about your faith you can lie about your virginity. Not like they dont have surgeries to reattach the hymen. You've proven to me in PMs you're an untrustworthy person. That's probably why you're still single. Have fun and do you boo, boo. But do not PM anymore with your troll nonsense. You aren't special, being a virgin doesn't make you special. being a good human being does and you've shown you aren't a good one. Have fun with whoever. I honestly pity the poor sap.
@t-8900 why did you write such a long comment to me and tagged me? If you don't want to talk then don't talk. LolIt is that simple
@marish01 no in PMS. its simple. DO NOT call yourself a Christian. You're a damn poser at best. DO NOT act like you're a Christian if you're gonna disregard your own source materials. Your own scripture says to 1) Not think yourself superior to others. 2) To turn the other cheek. 3) To practice what you preach. You're a lukewarm christian at best as referenced in Revelation. I love turning this right around at you knuckleheads to prove you for the frauds you are. In the end you're no better than any of us. But you openly go against you god so that makes you worse than Nicole or I. LOL GG!
@t-8900 if you read the Bible men are allowed multiple wives, women are not allowed multiple husbands. Men are called to lead, women are called to follow. Its not hypocritical at all. Men are only to compare to men and women to women. Your whole point is a false equivalency because men are not women and women are not men.
@bamesjond0069 Fuck the Bible. I'm not Christian. And if people like you who are egotistical, hypocritical, deluded, entitled and ignorant represent the faith, then that's a great affirmation to steer well clear. Also, no one here has a problem with people having 'preferences'. This has been discussed ad nauseam, and that's not the issue. The issue is double standards. You literally never answered a very simple question which was - considering you expect a woman to stick with you through thick and thin, are you capable of doing the same for her? If you're not, you are a PoS, end of story. And you have no business invoking religion. You want some fabulous being, yet you won't be one yourself. There's nothing masculine about that, and you can argue stupid polarity positions til the cows come home, it's irrelevant to this question. The deeper question is - why the hell do you think you're such a catch? You have a poisonous personality, you're deeply entitled, you have no concept of anything other than a radically narcissistic version of love and relationship... with all that, you could look like Brad Pitt and be a billionaire and no high calibre woman would touch you with a barge pole. But let's face it, you're probably neither particularly good looking or successful. Just a delusional person who likes virgins because they are too young and naive to see you for what you are.
@NicoletteXO "I'm not Christian." Thats fine i wasn't responding to you. I was responding to someone else who brought it up. I did not."The issue is double standards." I still don't see any double standard. What you're talking about is not a double standard because men are not women and women are not men."You literally never answered a very simple question which was - considering you expect a woman to stick with you through thick and thin, are you capable of doing the same for her?" Yes. Virginity is only important for marriage. If i was just wanting a casual relationship why would it matter?"The deeper question is - why the hell do you think you're such a catch?" Because i have my choice of women and get to be choosy however i want and can get what i want so why shouldn't i? If a virgin likes me why should i not pick her and pick someone i am not interested in? Makes no sense.
@bamesjond0069 Ok so you are saying you are capable of sticking with a woman through thick and thin then?
Yes thus why i would like to get married. I only really have one ex i was with for 10 years. Everyone else was just casual and fucking around and i knew and they knew it wasn't going anywhere. didn't keep many of them from asking for more but i had no intention of that with anyone.
@bamesjond0069 Were you clear and honest with those women you were 'fucking' that it was only casual sex for you? And out of curiosity, have you ever been deeply in love with a woman?
I never lied or anything and generally was quite up front. 99% of all the girls from my past still think good of me.Sure I've loved a few girls. But love isn't what makes for a good relationship. Everyone who gets divorced or cheated was in love too. Obviously love is not what makes the relationship.
@bamesjond0069 I'm not sure if you have deeply loved anyone, because you describe it in such a cavalier way. I am surprised women still wanted to have casual hookups with you when you were clear about it, but ok. Though, from the fact that you also said some were asking for more, it just seems like odd behaviour from someone who was very clear they were just in a casual situation which meant nothing to you.What happened with your ex you were with for 10 years? Why did you break up?
Also, do those women who "think good of you" know you just see them as sluts and nothing more? How do you know they think well of you? Are you still in contact? If so, why? If not, how do you know?
@NicoletteXO I'm sadly honestly not surprised that some women still want to be around people like him. I woulda chimed in earlier but my phone hates this thread because it's gotten so long and out of hand so won't load. A lot of women still go with terrible human beings and I think a lot of it has to do with the mental health crisis we are facing in our society today. Many of these girls likely never had fathers around to help guide them into making choices reflecting self love. Some people just view relationships as a business transaction or a means to sexual gratification. it's truly sickening to watch this stuff unfold.
@bamesjond0069 it tells you to LOVE your woman in the bible, which you fail to do. Also you need to follow scripture, practice what you preach. If you aren't strong enough for that you aren't strong enough for marriage according to doctrine. What's more the Bible allowed for Abraham and King David to have harems because for one thing they were of the old covenant and not beholden to Christ's word. And for another thing Abraham was a nomad and his people were ever moving and in danger and few in numbers. I understand you have a fantasy about getting your dick wet in every virgin. But consider that if that were to be a reality other guys would be bumping you off quickly and taking your women.
@NicoletteXO "I'm not sure if you have deeply loved anyone, because you describe it in such a cavalier way." I have. I just was raised to be better than my emotions. I see people fall in love with people they are just no good for all the time and i wonder why they dont break up. I've found if the person is good for me its easy to fall in love sooner than later. Ie i can love some girl who is not really what i want by accident sometimes but if i find the girl that checks all my boxes but the spark didn't come instantly well just keep dating it will come. Love does not belong in dating in my opinion."I am surprised women still wanted to have casual hookups with you" why though? Using the same framework you write off as wrong, i purposely set myself in the position of high value so it doesn't surprise me at all. But thats how i know its right because it works. Women say they dont want it but women are highly attracted to men with very traditional values and traditional masculine strengths. Period. So while i have many viewpoints and do things tons of women tell me im wrong about, it makes girls find me more attractive. I literally tell people i dont think women should be able to vote and need to stay in the kitchen. But women love a man who holds views like that. In part i believe it to some degree but some is just a show if im being honest. Idgaf if women work i just wouldn't date one who does. Personally i put more value in results with women than words of women.
@NicoletteXO "What happened with your ex you were with for 10 years? Why did you break up?" 1. I was younger and didn't hold all the views i held now. I had more modern accepted beliefs. They did not hold the relationship together. 2. We wanted different things. It wasn't an eventful breakup. She wanted to focus on x and i wanted to focus on y. And after awhile we just ended it. She has over the years flew or drove hours specifically to come see me a few different times. So its not like she hates me or had forgotten me."... just see them as sluts and nothing more?How do you know they think well of you? Are you still in contact? If so, why?" Yes. I call girls sluts and stuff all the time. I usually tell girls that they are a slut and i owe them nothing and will pay for things or not or respond to their calls or fuck them when i feel like it and never be faithful to them because i dont owe them jack shit. However i expect them to do whatever the fuck i want when i want it. They agree. Im hella nice though and dont actually be a dick about it though. Most call me a total gentleman. Many also call me a dick. Both correct id say. I stay in contact because i might want to fuck them again, and also im very social.
@t-8900 "they were of the old covenant and not beholden to Christ's word" and where does Jesus say not to have more than one wife? 🤔 read the Bible but never saw that part in there.
@bamesjond0069 read Matthew 19
@bamesjond0069 if you leave responses, fair. I'm doing weights and shadow boxing. won't be around till tomorrow to answer
@t-8900 you mean the part about divorce? Nobody is getting divorced so i dont see how its relevant.
@bamesjond0069 "two made one in the flesh" sorry i can't tonight though. tomorrow though i will explain more
@bamesjond0069 Well, as marish01 says, it is a matter of preferences. I defend your choice because nobody can tell you what you should want, if it is perfectly legal and doesn't involve minors, etc., as well as I defend sexually active women from slut-shaming or virgins from virgin-shaming (which is a real thing, too). In my case, I've suffered virgin-shaming for years and in a men's world this can be harsh. I had sex for the first time at 28years old and after that for several years I had been promiscuous enough just because I wanted to take over the virgin-guy stigma, although I know that if I didn't felt this social pressure I would have a way more normal sexual life. I would definitely prefer to live in a world without social pressure around sex, where people wouldn't preach to others like if their own choices were necessarily the best.
@bamesjond0069 " I call girls sluts and stuff all the time. I usually tell girls that they are a slut and i owe them nothing and will pay for things or not or respond to their calls or fuck them when i feel like it and never be faithful to them because i dont owe them jack shit. However i expect them to do whatever the fuck i want when i want it. They agree. Im hella nice though and dont actually be a dick about it though. Most call me a total gentleman. Many also call me a dick. Both correct id say. I stay in contact because i might want to fuck them again, and also im very social."WHO THE FUCK ARE THESE WOMEN? Either what you are suggesting is an outright lie/ troll, or you are literally mentally ill and delusional and believed this happened and it didn'tOR it did happen, and there exist women, women who have absolutely nothing in common with any woman I have encountered on planet earth in my entire lifetime, who are themselves mentally ill enough to think what you are suggesting is a worthwhile situation. Like, basically - either you are mentally ill, and this never happened. Or you are screwing mentally ill women... in which case you are still bordering on mentally ill yourself. There is literally no woman I have ever met who would be totally cool with a guy calling her a slut who genuinely had no care for her whatsoever, and would happily allow him to fuck her whenever he liked. Of course, the term 'slut' could be used erotically in certain contexst, and some women would like that, but that's not what we're talking about. It's the difference between a person literally calling a woman a bitch, and a friend being like 'oh bitch please'. Massive difference. If a woman literally likes abuse (not just role-play or teasing), she is mentally ill.
So this all kind of makes more sense now. You are mentally ill yourself. Fuck. I'm sorry dude. This goes beyond any debate about virgins. This is just straight up sad.
No most women are ok with it. Im hot and wealthy and have excellent delivery. Lol. I get away with murder. Im also very dominating and women fucking go wild for that. Now I respect a slut who can admit she's a slut, i dont have a problem with that and she has her place as a slut but i dont personally respect a slut who thinks she's wife material over a virgin, oh please. Most girls in private dont put on this charade y'all do publicly. Girls will in private drop the proud slut act and admit they made mistakes and what they did was wrong. I appreciate that and treat that girl nice although not marry her obviously. The ones that are proud sluts i treat like shit and they actually enjoy it because they know they are shit. Yeah those ones are mentally fucked in the head no doubt. But they respect a man who can see they are shit and treats them as they deserve and thats why i fuck with them. But even nice girls like to be put in their place by a man.
@bamesjond0069 My assessment is confirmed. You are mentally ill. Sociopathic for sure. What a hollow existence of cheap thrills and power games. No matter how much money you have, you cannot buy decency or character. And no matter how attractive you think you are, one day you will be old... and what will be left is what is in your heart. Which is unbelievably hollow. You are no better than a bully who fucks other kids up just because he can, and in the instances he doesn't, it is only because he can't. Your understanding of power is astonishingly superficial. Perhaps in a strange dog-eat-dog way, you may be in a better position than a man who is too weak, impoverished or incapable to pull a woman at all. However, you are nothing on a man of real power. A man who could mess with anyone, at any time, but chooses not to because he uses his strength not only for himself, but for the good of all. And you will never pull a woman of true power - virgin or not - because your heart is not worthy of that.
Yeah im not into ballbusting slut boss bitches. Everyone always tries to tell me why they are the best but id rather be single than with some shit like that. Trust me some of those women are the ones who like to be treated like trash and beg me to date them. I like sweet young virgin caring women who keep house and love kids and follow my lead. Thats all. Simple requirements that almost all women met at one point but decided to trash themselves. Thats their problem not mine. For whatever reason it offends so many women im in a happy relationship with someone i think is awesome and she feels the same about me. You won't see me give two fucks about women who prefer men that aren't like me say like beta fem simp men. If thats your thing go for it. Why would i get offended? But women aren't capable of such a thing because they are too emotional.
Also, I even more truly understand why you are attracted to virgins now. It is a power game / strategy for you. You make cunning assessments of women's capacities and predilections, then you use that to your maximum advantage, with no desire for genuine reciprocity - there always must be a kickback, and the odds must always be in your favour. I'm aware you perceive this as intelligence, and I'm sure you think very highly of your capacity to do this. But it is ultimately founded in your own deep rooted fear. You sociopathic because you are fearful. If you didn't hold all the cards in all situations, you would feel out of control. And you want so desperately to feel control. You relish it. This false sense of power. And yet, what you miss, and what you are not even capable of understanding you miss... is that the kind of relationship which will shake your core and rattle your bones and have your heart fly out of its cage like a bird which has been trapped for years being released at last... THAT kind of relationship is not available for those at the level of sociopathic, smooth-criminal-style relational machinations.
"with no desire for genuine reciprocity" i have a lot to offer a woman, women seem to think so too.I have to be in control. Im not the best at everything but im really good at most things. Im great at making money and financials, im great socially, i know everyone in town and people always give me things or invite me places, same with other aspects, if i turn over control of something it means i have to accept it being shittier than i can do it basically. So i need a girl who lets me be in control. I do suck at keeping house and stuff like that so thats a clear area a woman can contribute and it would be appreciated. And yes some women might make more than me or be better socially or something else like that but by the time they are they are too old for fertility reasons and not acceptable. So even if i wanted this route to be an option its not."shake your core and rattle your bones and have your heart fly out of its cage like a bird which has been trapped for years" thats how a woman describes love. I do not wish to experience emotions like a hysterical woman. Thank you very much. Plus how would i feel that way more with someone crappy and low value than with someone especially perfect just for me? Makes no sense. You see that hot young virgin you get along with great? Nah that ain't love. Try the bitchy old ho who could stand to lose 10lbs... ah that is true love. Yeah uh huh. Makes perfect sense in clown world.
@bamesjond0069 it is so cringy how women with a rich sexual past attack the character of men who prefer untouched women. There is only one purpose why they attack such men. They want to make him stop prefering virgins and instead prefer non virgins. Keep on saying you prefer virgins because they save themselves for the right man and watch insecure women who had many exes get fainted.That is entertaininh to watch. They lose their head when they know they are not desirable to some men.
@bamesjond0069 in all these comments you are being attacked for your VERY PERSONAL preference. These are the same people who say "others' personal choices are none of my business". Yet they spend hours attacking you in hopes for changing your mind in regards with your personal preferences so they won't feel insecure anymore. This is beyond cringey especially for people in their 30s.
@marish01 You know what's cringey my dear? Your delusions that you are going to start your own sitcom in America and meet your husband on the second series. THAT is cringey.
What is more cringey is that you talking about me for hrs. You two are that obsessed with me. This is not healthy.One must not have a life when they spend hours talking about another person they argued. It is beyond cringey.I can't believe you 2 got that triggered by my morals that you pm ed each other only to talk about me and get info.
@marish01 I have my choice of all manner of men. It is hilarious that you - having literally never experienced the consummated love of a man - think that. You are clearly the insecure one. And it's no wonder you are. I've been a virgin and I've been a non-virgin. I know the difference. You don't. You speak from utter lack of awareness.
@bamesjond0069 you know what happened? 😂😂😂😂The guy on here 89 something told about my life to this nicole girl. Imagine how much they are obsessed with me so they pmed each other only to gossip about me and fullfill their obsession over me.
@bamesjond0069 ""shake your core and rattle your bones and have your heart fly out of its cage like a bird which has been trapped for years" thats how a woman describes love. I do not wish to experience emotions like a hysterical woman. " You have literally never experienced love. It's so, so sad. It's like your sitting there with TV-dinner and I'm like, hey there are these things called Michelin star degustations. And you're like "I can't imagine it, so doesn't make sense to me. I'm good with my tater tots". Like fuck, ok. But yeah... really, truly sad.
Not on the 2nd seies but on the 2nd season. Either he was bad at informing or you are bad at memory.Still cringey. 😂😂😂
@marish01 You actually think that you're going to meet your American husband on the second series of your non-existent sitcom - which you are going to write and produce - even though you are 31 years old, and you neither live in America, nor have you ever worked in the industry you want to be a part of. And you want to tell me what's cringey? LMFAO. Come back in ten years and let's see how you did, honey.
I wouldn't want to be a non virgin. I am glad I don't have ex lovers. That would leave heartbroken and maybe bitter like you.I am full of love and enthusiasm because I didn't waste them on unimportant man. It gives me anticipation imagining that I will explore amazing things with the man I love.It feels empowering to know I didn't spend my youth having breakups and drama. I can't imagine you 2 talked about me for hours just to get more information about me. You are absolutely obsessed with me. What else did he say?You couldn't get satisfied with just one info. You would want to know more and more about me.
@marish01 Fucking LOL. You just can't handle that two people think you're a nincompoop and are laughing at you - deservedly, because you front with delusional and unwarranted bombast. If you think that's obsession, then that shows how little you understand of human psychology. Not to mention how. hilariously narcissistic you are. Keep dreaming, dear.
You were spending hours talking about a girl's persinal life and plans. And you never met her.Get a life. You are a 35 year old adult.
@marish01 No, we laughed at you for a few minutes. And deservedly so. Precisely because of this kind of narcissistic delusion you keep revealing. You fronted this whole conversation by calling non-virgin women sluts and deluding yourself that as a sexless 31 one year old wanna be with no husband and no career... that you are somehow superior. Then you claim to be "full of love"? Throw me a bucket. You have never experienced even a hint of true love, and it's pretty fucking clear from your attitude that you are judgmental and delusional. So please, spare us the fake love troll.
It is not 2 people It is 2 mentally sick insecure people with huge emotional baggage who got butthurt because a virgin saves herself for the right man. Keep on getting bitter. I don't regret for not having breakups and lose all my anticipation and enthusiasm for love.But your obsession over me is not healthy.How will you keep on living without getting new information about me?
@marish01 So delusional. This is why you are the butt of other people's jokes. You just keep repeating your imagined fantasy and thinking that makes it so, because it validates your buffoon-sized ego. I truly hope you do actually find a husband soon. So that you can start to realize what absolute tripe you've been dishing up here. You'd better get cracking though. At the moment, the American men who are interested in marrying a delusional 31 year old wannabe with no marketable skills are in their late 40s to early 50s. If you wait much longer, you're going to need to marry a really old fart. That will be when the rubber hits the road and your fantasy starts colliding with reality.
A man who respects himself prefers an untouched woman. Ask your man if he gets turned on or off by imagining you with all the men who fucked you.
I didn't say American. Even if he will be American he shouldn't be a beta cuck
@marish01 There's no obsession. And no hours of talking. You are simply a clown who repeats herself like a broken record because she wishes that were the case. Like the fact that you've never been intimate with anyone, yet in your own mind you think you are super eligible. Of course, in your little bubble of mental illness you believe that. And you're also incredibly unoriginal. I was the one who pointed out the obvious fact of your mental illness, and you are so lacking in creativity you can't even come up with your own comeback, so you just parrot my words. I'm sure with all that lack of insight and capacity for original thought, your sitcom will be just grrrrrrreat.
You did talk about me to get as much infi as possible. This is obsession. You make me repeat the same thing over and over again.You keep on saying the same things so I have to repeat myself.But does you man get turned on by imaginning how you got other men's dicks in your holes?Real men get turned off by it Because the very idea that they are beloved woman has had the sexual intimacy with other men makes them feel less of a man.
@marish01 Actually there are many men who get turned on by that. And there are others who do not. This is all part of the wide realm of sexual experience which you know nothing of. I don't make you repeat yourself, you do it (seemingly) because you haven't got anything original to say. Just tired old platitudes. Honestly, it would not surprise me in the least if you end up marrying some dude who you think is "the one", only to discover he has all kinds of kinks and fetishes. Then you're going to be in a mighty pickle with all your nonsense moralising.
Jesus Christ woman, can you even hear yourself? "Real men get turned off by it Because the very idea that they are beloved woman has had the sexual intimacy with other men makes them feel less of a man"Real men do not feel like 'less of a man' because of ANYONE'S behavior, least of all instances where his beloved experienced joy. A real man is not jealous, or possessive or fearful. What you are describing is man-children.
Those men who love imagining their wife get fucked by other men are cucks.I did say that.My man will have strong family values. He should value intimacy. Otherwise he can't be my hisband.
@marish01 please don't pretend you even know what a cuck is. You've never even been close to an erection. You have no idea about the nature of sex or sexual dynamics, since you have no experience in that realm. I have no problem with who you choose for your husband. Assuming you don't run out of time first... BUT your insistence on demeaning others who choose differently to you is the crux of what makes you mentally ill. You're a bigot and nothing more. In the same way that it's fine for you to not be interested in homosexuality, but it's not fine for you to vilify homosexuals, it's fine for you to be a virgin and so on, but not for you to vilify those with sexual experience.
It is not jealousy. It is intimacy. Not wanring to share your woman is not jealousy. Therefore prefering a woman who hasn't been with other men before yiy is not jealousy. It means he values that he is the only one who touches her.
You think a real man is the one who prefers a woman who have had dicks in her?FineI think a real man is the one who prefers a woman who saved herself for the right man and she is definitely untouched. No dick has been in her before. See? We have different views which is fine. We are not supposed to have same views.You said "I've never met a woman who was a virgin beyond her early 20s who wasn't actually a bit messed up psychologically"And I am saying that I've never met a promiscuos woman who wasn't actually a bit messed up psychologically.I just brought up promiscuous women to say that they are the woman of whom I think what you think of virginsAnd non virgins are not necessarily promiscuous. They can be loyal, moral women
@marish01 Well! This is the most reasonable comment you've made. I think it's a good place to end the discussion. I am glad you admit that non-virgins can be moral and wonderful women. This is certainly the first time you've raised anything like this, and I am happy to hear that. Ultimately, I do hope you find that husband you are seeking.
@marish01 One thing I have to say:If you have chosen to remain a virgin until finding the right person, that's your personal choice and nobody should shame you for this. by the way, you are incredibly beautiful
I never said non virgins are bad people. I said how prefering a virgin makes sense. I am sure many people think not prefering virgins makes sense.Most of my beloved women are not virgins. Plus I will be a non virgin when I get married. So how can I hate non virgins?And I believe that a woman who has more than 1000 sex partners eventually might regret her choice and form the same views on intimacy as I do. We will ve equally pure mindset wise. Except I am untouched. And there are virgins who have the mindset of promiscuos women. They are not pure to me at all because t is our mindset that makes us pure.I don't want my husband to just like the first time because it is losing virginity. I want him to appreciate that I valued marriage and love to the point of wanting sex after marriage and only with him. I want him to love me after losing my virginity to him. I am not obsessed with my first time. Every single time I will have sex will be special because I value my body and because it is with my first man.
@Juan_Curious thank you 👍🏻
@marish01 My goodness, I feel like I am speaking with a different person! And I like this person a lot more than the old one! Everything you say is perfectly fine and reasonable. No qualms whatsoever. I can't say I have ever met any woman who has slept with 1000 people. I would say this would be an incredibly small percentage of the population. "Every single time I will have sex will be special because I value my body and because it is with my first man." - that's a lovely sentiment. I can wholeheartedly say that every single time I have ever had sex has been special, because I also value my body - I know it's wisdom, power, beauty and preciousness.Hey... even though I admitted already I do think it's probably a long shot... good luck with the sitcom. If it's in your destiny, you'll get there.
@marish01 Is your choice motivated by religious views or is it a personal belief?
"You have literally never experienced love. It's so, so sad." What you're talking about is being pussy whipped simp. Men are principled and therefore dont allow their emotions to dictate their actions. I've fallen in love before but for example i believe it morally wrong to marry a slut or a single mom. Its a bad risk for the man and future kids, its condoning womens bad behavior, im also Christian and while i dont follow things perfectly or even understand things perfectly, i think thats clearly wrong and not whats intended. So for me i dont care if i fall in love with some woman who is unmarrigable, she still unmarrigable and im not going to compromise my values. Why? Because im not a simp beta who acts like a woman and follows my emotions. You sound like you're very used to weak feminine men who can't even stand up for their own values if it conflicts with their emotions. Thats not what makes men happy. Shit im one of the happiest fuckers you would ever meet IRL i annoy the shit out of people honestly. But i mean i understand how to embrace my masculine emotions quite well and i know acting like a woman doesn't make men happy, it causes depression. When i was younger i thought more that way and was depressed. When i stopped being a bitch many years ago now, overnight i was happy motivated charged up. Im glad acting like a woman is exciting for you, makes sense to me. Not sure why you have zero empathy and can't understand why a man doesn't similarly feel excited and happy to act like a man. you're literally holding me to your ideas instead of respecting my own personal desires and experiences. This shows your lack of empathy and possible sociopathic tendencies and need to control others you have no relation to. Wheras i only seek to control someone who wants me to be in control and be on a team towards common goals, you seek to change someone who doesn't want your control into something they dont want. Maybe something to explore with a professional.
@bamesjond0069 LMFAO. Mr "I call women sluts and use them how I please" accuses me of "lack of empathy". I'm sorry, give me moment. bahaahahahahahahahahahahaaha
@bamesjond0069 Before you wet your nappy, scroll up a little and you'll see that once Marish actually became a reasonable human and said something along the lines of "ok, you have your preference and I have mine - I accept some non-virgins are loyal and moral women" I was very happy to run with that. I even sent her some genuine well wishes. There is a difference though between your ideology and her (now recently upgraded) ideology... you are not just saying that "I wouldn't want to marry a non-virgin" (which, while I don't resonate with that, is your choice)... you are saying "non-virgins are unmarriagable". This is the difference between being like "I don't want to engage in homosexual acts" (which is your prerogative) and vilifying homosexuals - which is bigotry. First part, no problemo. Second part, big problemo.
@bamesjond0069 And I maintain you have not been in true love. A man in love is not remotely simpy. A weak man who is being swayed by goo-goo eyes is, but that's not what I'm talking about here. A man in love is inspired to engage in extraordinary acts of courage and fortitude. I have witnessed this, and it's power has floored me. Real love is not something that grates against a man's principles. It is at the core of a man's principles.
@NicoletteXO Unmarriageable TO ME. Maybe you're not aware of this but i dont get to decide who other people marry. Surprise! Why do you care if the idea of marrying a slut disgusts me? I think only men who are losers marry sluts but thats their decision and problem when it becomes one and its my opinion to have.
@bamesjond0069 "What you're talking about is being pussy whipped simp. Men are principled and therefore dont allow their emotions to dictate their actions. I've fallen in love before but for example i believe it morally wrong to marry a slut or a single mom. Its a bad risk for the man and future kids, its condoning womens bad behavior, im also Christian and while i dont follow things perfectly or even understand things perfectly, i think thats clearly wrong and not whats intended."You're missing a deep philosophical message about forgiveness. Jesus had prostitutes become clean, they ended up married off to good men. Jesus forgave those who were truly sorry. A single mother doesn't have to be one because she was a slut either. There are so many variables to that. And you acting like men dont have the power to coerce and use women is as disingenuous as it comes. You revoke these women's humanity and intrinsic value as a child of God when you say and do the things you do. You cause more hurt in the world by your words and actions. If men werent supposed to use emotions they simply wouldn't have them. But we were built to have compassion and the fact of the matter is that's the most human quality a person can have. I suggest you do some charity work and expose yourself more to the twisted reality that so many young women go through. It's not being a "simp" to be a guardian over these women and want to protect them so they can get out of their rut and not have the mistakes repeat. I mentioned to Nicole guys like you should have been forced by society at a young age to have to do the shit I voluntarily did in my youth. You should do charities in the inner city, you should take time in boot camp, and you should attend and pass with flying colors a class on human psychology. What you're actually doing is coping out. It's not a sign of a strong man. Part 1 of 2
@bamesjond0069 A strong man is a natural leader and he's also a guardian defender of those who are weaker. That has always been the calling of a man. Just because the rest of society has conformed to a new world of shit doesn't mean you shouldn't strive to be the change for it. Part of being a strong man and good Christian is to face these challenges head on. I highly doubt you are a Christian able to defend his views to the point of dying for them. Many strong men and women were fed to lions, crucified, or burned alive for their convictions. I think they're a real example of the difficulties are real Christian should be openly willing to face. What you have said this whole time is not coming from a place of God or from the heart. It's coming from a greedy and arrogant person. There are so many examples in the Bible of how God sees ALL of His children equally in his eyes and that you aren't supposed to go around thinking you're better than others. Walk a day in another persons world and then you contemplate your world view. I can promise you I was a black pilled mf at one point in my life. Completely disdained women and even saw them as nothing more than F meat. But shit happens, shit changes, I was willing to change and learn. If you are not then again I say you're not a "alpha male".part 2 of 2
@bamesjond0069 Cool. Then if you think that, I'll tell you what I think. I think men like you are the lowest pieces of dogshit to walk the earth. I genuinely believe that when you pass over to the next life, you will have a reckoning moment of the destruction your hatred and bigotry has caused, and it will not be pretty. I also think men like you are profoundly sad. It is sad that you waste your life. It is sad that you are so profoundly disconnected to the possibilities of love and exaltation that you desecrate even the possibility that they exist. You aim for so much less than what is possible. I also think men like you are weak. Weak and terrified to your core. Literally the opposite of the masculinity you delude yourself you embody. And lastly, I think men like you are fundamentally ignorant. Which is why none of what I say will land. But that's ok. I guess we leave it at that. Que sera, sera. It has been the opposite of a pleasure.
@t-8900 AMEN! What a profound statement. You couldn't be more right - a real man is a guardian and protector of humanity. Not a person who runs around lighting fires, then disdaining smoke.
@t-8900 "Jesus forgave those who were truly sorry." Two points here 1. Forgiveness doesn't mean acceptance. You can forgive someone for abusing you, but you don't have to accept them into your home to forgive them. I believe slutty immoral women can be better and have value, but that doesn't mean I have to accept them as a wife. 2. Those who are truly sorry. If a woman is justifying her slut ho ways, she is not truly sorry, she is trying to perpetuate her poor behavior. The first step in recovery is to admit you have a problem. If these girls are saying "There is nothing wrong with the fact I had casual sex with 10 men" they are not accepting their behavior is a problem."I suggest you do some charity work and expose yourself more to the twisted reality that so many young women go through. It's not being a "simp" to be a guardian over these women and want to protect them so they can get out of their rut and not have the mistakes repeat."This is called being a white knight. Defending people who would stab you in the back and perpetuate their bad ways is not something to aspire to. Plus my hands are full with actual decent women who need help standing up to being judged for being good. Id rather focus on telling women its ok to submit to a man, its ok to wait until marriage, its ok to be a home maker and put your family first. Nobody tells girls that stuff these days. I don't have time to go out and be captain save a ho."I mentioned to Nicole guys like you should have been forced by society at a young age to have to do the shit I voluntarily did in my youth. You should do charities in the inner city, you should take time in boot camp, and you should attend and pass with flying colors a class on human psychology." I actually have done all of that, not sure what it has to do with anything."even saw them as nothing more than F meat" I never thought this way. That's pretty fucked up that you did.
@bamesjond0069 you literally did all the things that you criticized others for. And you saying you did all the things I say you should do, I know you're full of shit now. You had fun with your troll and I'll not indulge another moment of it. God had those men marry those prostitutes. Somehow I'm not sure if you could do it yourself even if your God commanded it. You're too arrogant. And to my last point, I changed, you're still actively doing it unabashedly. I'm no more a white knight then a soldier or officer of the law. I simply DO. So yeah, that's it. This has been a waste of my time and i shouldn't have indulged this long with a fake.
@bamesjond0069 you have got to be fucking kidding me. You said, and I quote: "Im hot and wealthy and have excellent delivery. Lol. I get away with murder. Im also very dominating and women fucking go wild for that. Now I respect a slut who can admit she's a slut, i dont have a problem with that and she has her place as a slut but i dont personally respect a slut who thinks she's wife material over a virgin, oh please. Most girls in private dont put on this charade y'all do publicly. Girls will in private drop the proud slut act and admit they made mistakes and what they did was wrong. I appreciate that and treat that girl nice although not marry her obviously. The ones that are proud sluts i treat like shit and they actually enjoy it because they know they are shit. Yeah those ones are mentally fucked in the head no doubt. But they respect a man who can see they are shit and treats them as they deserve and thats why i fuck with them. But even nice girls like to be put in their place by a man."But you now say it's "pretty fucked up" that t-8900 at one point considered women F-meat. And that you never did? Well, the above paragraph demonstrated that you clearly did. And still do. So PLEASE spare us the "I'd rather spend my time supporting women to be good". Then be a fucking man and stick to your morals. Go do something to support women you deem to be good. Stop spending your time being an absolutely predatory and sociopathic asshat to women who you freely admit are mentally unhinged. You are literally the cause of the existence of the problem you disdain in society. By the way, to clarify, I am in no way suggesting that a woman who has sexual experience is unhinged, however, the kind of woman who would allow herself to be treated in the way you treat her is - and you admit this.
Also, you actually believe yourself to be a "Christian"? What a load of shit. I'm pretty sure Jesus didn't die on a cross so you could get your dick wet by preying on a poor girl who probably hopes you actually care about her, then judging her as unclean, as if you're not the one who gave her herpes.
@NicoletteXO "But you now say it's "pretty fucked up" that t-8900 at one point considered women F-meat. And that you never did?" No i didn't. Women as a whole are not F meat. Specific women who purposely destroy their potential and make zero use of themselves except to sleep around town are literally F meat. They are mentally fucked and terrible people. Women are not mentally fucked and terrible people, thats ridiculous because there's lots of great women.
@bamesjond0069 "Specific women who purposely destroy their potential and make zero use of themselves except to sleep around town are literally F meat." These women do not exist. No one purposely destroys their potential. And nobody does literally nothing else in their lives except sleep around. While I accept a distinction between sexually experienced people whose choices are in integrity with themselves, and those who are relatively indiscriminate - there is no-one who fits your description, even amongst the indiscriminate. These people - and I say people because they can be male or female - are brothers, sisters, sons, daughters. You call yourself a Christian, yet you dehumanize children of your God. If you believe there is one child of God that is nothing more than a piece of meat for you to fuck, then you sir, are Satanically possessed. You truly are the lowest of the low.
"These women do not exist." Maybe you are a woman and as a woman you would not know. They certainly do exist.Your atheist interpretation of a good Christian is not relevant and discussing that with you is pointless. I dont have time to give you a Bible lesson. Read the Bible through front to back a few times and then we can talk.
@bamesjond0069 LMFAO you already got royally schooled in scripture above. So please, spare us. As I said, pretty sure Jeebus didn't die on the cross so you could get your dick wet by preying on vulnerable women, then vaingloriously chastise them for the gonorrhea you gave them.
doesn't even make sense. Why dont you also teach me about hindu and buddah while you're at it. Smh.
@bamesjond0069 It makes perfect sense. Also, you could use a lesson in Buddhism. Might teach you something. Since you failed basic Christianity.
So, why is it wrong if a guy is a virgin? How does that change the dynamic? @Pumpkinspice009
I don't know but I don’t believe in virginity for guys in the first place, secondly it sounds unusual plus kind of a turn off. It’s all my opinion
@Subarugirl All was my opinion. And in my opinion it’s not false, if you don’t think so, then it’s your opinion.
Where do i stand in this? Love anime (degree in Japanese language and culture) not a virgin, dont give a shit how many partners she had, bisexual, favorite attitude in life fuck around and find out.
Then dont reply fucking idiot. You dont know shit.
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I can have her both ways no worries
Probably the same way a rapist is a bad choice for a mate. The difference between a rapist and a decent man is literally just sticking his dick in a pussy, thats it.
@bamesjond0069 wrong. It's sticking a his dick in her legs against her will. A decent man will do it with her consent. Very different.
She lose a part of her soul each dick she takes making it harder to connect & love
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 so if she says yes or no it makes a difference? Golly gee. So i bet it makes a difference too if she says "i do" first too!
@Darksign losing your virginity doesn’t mean you sleep around, and that statement is false. @bamesjond0069 C O N S E N T. go ask your mommy to explain since the word is too big for you to comprehend.
That went over your head i see. *facepalm*
@bamesjond0069 yes it does a big difference between raping someone and just having sex. It's scary that you don't know it.
Guess I'm talking to a bunch of bricks. Where do these people even come from on GAG? 😂
@bamesjond0069 funny I was wondering the same thing.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 im not the one arguing with you about something we agree about. 😂
@bamesjond0069 I don't think we agree on much.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 well obviously we both agree if a woman says yes before sex or not makes a huge difference about a mans character. So why dont you think if a woman says "i do" before she has sex it doesn't say anything about her character?
He meant physically they are the same act.
@bamesjond0069 I think it means a lot if a women rapes a man. That's what you described to men it was rape. If a woman, or a man say yes to sex there is nothing wrong. It is wrong when they act without consent.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 so if he acts without consent first doesn't it say something about his character?
@bamesjond0069 if he acts without consent, not just at first, always, yes it says something about his character.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 so why does his past say something about him but hers does not? Makes no sense
@bamesjond0069 because the past that you describe is a crime. An awful crime forcing himself into another. Have sex is not a crime as long as is consensual.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 so what if his past was to always skip plans and never show up on time and not even care. She shouldn't assume that has anything to do with the future? Smh.
@bamesjond0069 if anyone makes mistakes in the past, those are indicators of that person's personally yes. But sex is not a mistake! That's what you are not getting. A girl or a guy can have all the sex she wants and none of it be a mistake. If what happened in the past is not a mistake then I have no reason to judge them as having a bad personality.
just saw this. I need to make an apology because i once had a misconceived notion of you that clearly was not true so I'll just apologize for it. Dont be offended by I used to think based on some of your posts that your heart was in the fight place but that you were likely a fuckboy. Sorry XD
@Sarahr123 I respectfully disagree. I don't think it's based on age. A woman who has a hookup to lose her virginity at 26 is no different than a woman who has a hookup to lose her virginity at 16.
@Jamie05rhs most women who choose to remain virgin until that late don’t have hookups because they’re not cheap skanks. Usually if she’s a cheap skank she’ll have it popped very young and she’ll be very loose by the time she’s 20.
Women divorce because of sexual frustration, though. A woman will stay in an extremely toxic relationship as long as he's fucking her good.
@Jamie05rhs Its the other way around my friend. If he is toxic she will leave no matter how good the fuck. Unless she is a low level woman.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 Are you being serious right now? Or do you just not get out much?
@Jamie05rhs I am being serious. Like I said only low level women stay in toxic relationships.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 I don't think it's right to victim-blame those women.
@Jamie05rhs the argument was that they stayed in toxic relationships because the sex was good. There are many reasons why women stay in toxic relationships like fear, love, dependance, etc. Good sex is not one of the valid reasons.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 I disagree.
@Jamie05rhs For you good sex would be a good reason to stay in a toxic relationship?
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 Do you mean for me personally?
@This_Is_My_Opinion. Hmm. That's a really tough question. ... Though, let's look at it this way: If my woman was treating me badly, I don't think I would want to have sex with her. That would put me out of the mood.
@Jamie05rhs Out of the mood, but you would stay in the relationship? Let's address something, when you say toxic what do you think off? Just loud, judgmental, rude and manipulative? Or also physical and mental abuse to the point of leaving scars?
I would stay in the relationship, yes. Because I don't believe in divorce.And I would try to fix things.
Toxic? Hmm. I guess the first set of characters that you listed. She could try to be physically violent, but I don't think it would affect me. I'm a pretty big guy, and I have a high pain threshold.
@Jamie05rhs regardless if you can take it or not if she get physical you should leave. But that's my take on things.
1. Why never loving someone before is valuable? 2. Why never had a hookup before is valuable? That just means she is inexperienced and doesn't know how to be in a relationship and how to fuck.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 Go ahead and be with someone that sleeps around and has ex drama. You can deal with the consequences.
fool *I* have ex drama. wtf are you talking about? You act like people dont have a past. You act like only women have baggage. if you want to have women like that stick to blow up dolls.
That has nothing to do with your virginity, and everything to do with the fact that you deal poorly with setbacks in life.
@NicoletteXO That's not fair at all. That was a big deal to her. You can't minimize her pain.
@Jamie05rhs I'm not minimizing her pain. I'm saying it is not caused by losing her virginity, but by the fact she deals poorly with setbacks in life. Rachel794 agrees with me. Most other people who get their hearts broken, even from those who they lost their virginity to, do not - years after the fact - become (in her own words) "harsh", "not nice" and selfish. This is an indication of someone who does not deal well with setbacks. Getting ones heart broken is a very difficult, but normal part of human life.
@NicoletteXO. It's actually not normal, even though it is common. It's quite a traumatic experience for many people. You should try to be more compassionate.
Says the person who responded rudely when I posted my confidence as a virgin here earlier
But hey! That’s ok. I still respect you :) I love that Girls ask Guys is filled with all kinds of different people and views.
@Rachel794 did i say something rude? if i did let me know. my view is simply your virginity doesn't make you more or less of a human being. If you read through the post of who i was talking to dude was literally referring to non-virgin women as rusty cars. Sorry i dont play that game. All are born with intrinsic value and they still have value after they lose their virginity.
yeah apparently these guys it makes you worth less of a person
It isn't right to turn a girl down just because she has had sex.. i mean its different if she's sleeping around with lots of guys left and right but if she has had sex in the past and her body count is low that is wrong to try to define her.
Not every guy is insecure like that. Almost all men date and marry women who are not virgins.
Not "bad", just not as preferred as virgins, and this gets progressively worse with each partner until you're seen as promiscuous, which is the other extreme, and obviously most people consider that as quite bad.
Most guys aren't too worried about that^
Pretty sure the trend is for most guys not to like promiscuity and to have more favor toward inexperience.
@AllThatSweetJazz your definition of promiscuity is off buddy especially if I only gave myself to one guy before
Promiscuity is sleeping with lots of guys and I haven’t.. I slept with one guy before big deal oh boo hoo but yet it’s okay for a guy no matter what even if he’s fucked a few girls? He wants a high five and a trophy?
It’s called being insecure so if most guys don’t expect girls to not feel insecure I’m gonna expect a guy not to either, this society can’t be one sided nor a relationship or it’ll never be healthy. Everyone’s life and experiences are different people need to learn to just let it go if someone had an experience already , it should be about his or her personality not whether or not they have did the deed.
“It’s called being insecure”You *like* to call it “insecure”. But of course people who are bothered by it are going to say things like that. We know it’s a silly thing to say because of how no other possibility is even considered and how being dismissive was the default reaction instead of indifference. So let's just rein it in.“this society can’t be one sided nor a relationship”It depends on your definition. There’s an interpretation in which pretty much any relationship is “one-sided” so it’s not worth caring about. Just focus on making it work, not on the hang ups of those external to your relationship.“people need to learn to just let it go if someone had an experience already”We can say that about lots of things, but you like what you like and not going to change and neither is anyone else. We reconcile through compromise. Telling other people to let something go would be having a “one-sided” expectation.“it should be about his or her personality not whether or not they have did the deed.”It’s about both. Have sex with 10000 people and that’s going to be a pretty gross no matter what. Sorry that’s just how people are, that’s just plain old disgust, not insecurity.
I would argue that there's a sweet spot and it's not at "virgin". I don't really wanna rehash it in detail right now, but experience, self discovery, life experience, relationship experience, experimentation and more are factors. Virgins are a lot of work in that respect because you have to "catch them up". I feel that the pros of dating a virgin are benefits that would mostly be attractive to insecure or religious people and frankly many arguments I've heard are not that strong. Arguments around things like faithfulness, and "ability to pair bond", not comparing, etc. Let alone a religious belief that virgins are morally superior and haven't "given in to depravity".It just seems like a lot of bullshit that doesn't matter, whereas a woman who's had some experiences before will bring a somewhat mature and sophisticated psycho-sexuality to the table.
yeah apparently redemption and change aren't a possibility. and apparently if you had sex before marriage it was obviously in a mindless threesome in the back of a night club with randoms. These people are so ass backwards
@AllThatSweetJazz that is not the trend. Most guys like a girl with experience.
If I like you I would not care if its one or 100 guys, thought i would be interested how you got 100 guys at the age of 22 xD. On the other side I dont really want to date virgins, I think its too much hassle to deal with. Or at least ones who declare to entire world. Look at me im fucking virgin...
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 Not from what the stats have always told us. Seems like a lot of the reasoning from those that disagree isn't that they've actually more fundamentally attracted to the idea of experience itself, rather it's a bunch of contextual disadvantages that sound like "I would like it, but in practical terms..." or "it's too much effort/hassle". Those types of positions aren't really arguing against virginity as an ideal though, more like arguing about tangential problems.
@AllThatSweetJazz can you give me those stats? Did a quick search and couldn't find them, but most links say the idea that men prefer virgins is an overated stereotype. Which makes sense since virginity is not looked at socially as a sacred thing anymore. As far as to why that is changing it's obvious, non virgins are better in bed. While a virgin brings nothing to the table that a non virgin doesn't.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 Surprisingly I have nothing to a high standard on the topic. Meaning like peer-reviewed, good methodology, and published within the last 5 years. It's like people won't research this stuff anymore or that it's buried under weird keywords.Like there's this, but it's old."Inshort-term mating contexts more than long-term mating contexts, men expressed a particular dislike for women who have alow sex drive, are prudish, and who lack sexual experience,although low sex drive and prudishness are also disliked bymen in long-term mates. In contrast, lack of sexual experienceis mildly valued by men in a long-term mate. These findings support the hypothesis that men's short-term mate preferencesfunction to solve, at least in part, the problem of identifyingwomen who are sexually accessible."Sexual strategies theory : an evolutionary perspective on human matingBUSS, D. M ; SCHMITT, D. PSo we have nothing conclusive on that level. But I mean, I think the mere prevalence of the idea, it's long history, and all the guys expressing that they prefer inexperience shows there's *something* there. Do some polling.You say most say it's overrated, I see a lot of people confirming it's real."As far as to why that is changing it's obvious, non virgins are better in bed. While a virgin brings nothing to the table that a non virgin doesn't."That's a poor excuse because obviously inexperienced girls become experienced when they get with you. It's very strange to me to prefer that some other guys have had sex with her first so that she's "better in bed", like... or I just do it myself -- and that has the plus side of the whole teaching/learning experience along with the bonus of simply not having been with other dudes in itself. What they bring to the table is that they have straight up had fewer experiences with other men.
@AllThatSweetJazz I actually would like to see such a study today I think people would be surprised by the results. It also depends on what people consider a lot of sexual experience. The average partner a person has today is 7. That is already far from a virgin, but not very experienced for today's standards. Yes but the first few times will never be as food as they would be with an experienced one? Why chose someone that you know won't be as good in bed as another. She won't be as comfortable doing some things. She will be in pain. She won't more, touch or suck as well. Nothing. You say that she will learn, yes she will but that's like buying a guidance dog that needs you to train it or buy an already trained one. He will eventually do what you want, but while he doesn't it will be very frustrating. But with you and all guys here that prefer virgins the main point is what you just said "What they bring to the table is that they have straight up had fewer experiences with other men."It's ego. It's the feeling that you are the first. They somehow makes you feel special just because they didn't had another before. I don't understand why that knowledge translates into mental satisfaction. More só since you are compromising amazing sex for average to mediocre on your first times in exchange for that.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “That is already far from a virgin, but not very experienced for today's standards.”That’s very “experienced” and it isn’t an explanation for anything.“Yes but the first few times will never be as food as they would be with an experienced one?”Firstly. So? Am I to base my relationship on the few times I have sex with the person? There’s obviously a bigger picture than that.Secondly. The teaching/learning experience makes it good. I think it’s perfectly reasonable to say it’s at least comparable to being with someone experienced, and by the time she’s “experienced” with me, she now is both more capable in bed and had minimal contact with other dudes, that’s better than the averaged “experienced” girl to me.“He will eventually do what you want, but while he doesn't it will be very frustrating.”In that context, you also get to build a relationship with the animal. But that lacks a comparative aspect to sexual history. I would prefer to train an animal to build a personal relationship with it, but I’m also not grossed out by other people training my animal. That’s a different context than sex.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “It's ego. It's the feeling that you are the first.”In part. But so is any validation in a relationship. The fact that they like you feels good.In the case of inexperienced girls, it feels more meaningful. But it’s not just that. It’s also disgust at the alternative. Like, I wouldn’t call it an ego thing if something about a person just grosses you out regardless of what it is. I have a much more severe line I draw than inexperience: I completely refuse to be with someone who’s kink is poo stuff. Luckily that’s very rare to be into, but me disliking it in a person is not an ego thing, it’s a disgust thing. So with girls I see the inexperience appreciation to be a mixture of a normal wholesome kind of valuing of someone special (you can call it ego, but that doesn’t make it bad or abnormal) and disgust at the alternative. I think you can trace it all back to evolutionary adaptations.“I don't understand why that knowledge translates into mental satisfaction.”Good for you. I don’t understand why it wouldn’t.“More só since you are compromising amazing sex for average to mediocre on your first times in exchange for that.”Again, I think there’s aspects to that circumstance which more than make up for sexual competence. But regardless, it would still seem like a minor annoyance compared to everything else in a relationship. Sounds like the smallest of small potatoes.If the first few times is that much of hinge for you on the satisfaction of a relationship, then you do you. I’ll prioritize the inexperienced girls and if it doesn’t work out you can have sloppy seconds. It’s probably better that we don’t all like the same thing, otherwise the things we want would become scarcer.
@AllThatSweetJazz My point was that you need to clarify what is a lot of experience today. Many men might prefer some experience to a virgin. But not a lot of experience.So? So you are exchanging good sex for nothing. You gain literally nothing from a virgin that you don't have from a non virgin. You also get a learning/teaching experience with a non virgin, but this time you both learn and teach. She can make you better too. A virgin can't. No one is saying to base your relationship on the first times you have sex. To base your decision on how many partners a girl had before you, 100 or zero, will never be a good idea. Her personality is what matters the most for it to work long term. But you can build a relationship with a trained animal anyway. That doesn't make the bond any less strong. Specially since you both always have to somehow adapt to each other and learn what the other likes.
@AllThatSweetJazz In part no my friend. Is the entire deal. It feels more meaningful with less experienced girls? How? They have no point of compassion! Makes much more sense to feel important because you got chosen between many. I call it ego and I would also call it a kink for some. No judging. If virgins are your thing fine have at them, but call it a kink. Don't try to justify that's because they are inherently better. About the experience in bed, answer me something. Which will also go into the ego point. You talk about the teaching and learning process. But you you feel good at being the student? What if you both have something to teach and something to learn? Don't you both have to adapt and meet the new partner that you are with? I agree that is good we all like different things. I had a total of two virgins before and one was a serious relationship, I don't think they are not relationship worthy. My only point is that calling an experienced girl "sloppy seconds" makes no sense since they have some advantages over virgins. And they can call out dicks "useless milked meat" by the same logic.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “My point was that you need to clarify what is a lot of experience today.”I don’t think we do, the median experience is different from preferred experience.We should define “experience”. Everyone frequently switches between what they’re talking about. We should stipulate what we mean though. “Experience” is not a super useful term on its own, so let’s break it into the parameters people actually care about. Partner count. The number of sexual partners you’ve had, although this can subjectively be extended to different acts or even just romantic connections, intimate touching, etc.Amount of sex. A kind of experience that can vary independent of partner, so should be treated independently.Ability. A person’s ability to satisfy a partner through skills.“So you are exchanging good sex for nothing. You gain literally nothing from a virgin that you don't have from a non virgin.”I’m trading good sex with a girl who has had previous partners for good sex with a girl that has had fewer previous partners.“You also get a learning/teaching experience with a non virgin”But it’s obviously not the same thing, is it? That’s a person who has already had a bunch of experiences.“To base your decision on how many partners a girl had before you, 100 or zero, will never be a good idea.”I’m not basing my decision on that. It’s a just a preference.“But you can build a relationship with a trained animal anyway. That doesn't make the bond any less strong.”I disagree. But it’s also less satisfying. It’s not ideal.“Specially since you both always have to somehow adapt to each other and learn what the other likes.”And doing it with the less experienced girl would be my preference.
“Makes much more sense to feel important because you got chosen between many.”But isn’t that ego? I thought we didn’t like that.In this context, I don’t relate to that at all. Anything to do with other guys is going to be turning me off. As her partner count increases, I don’t feel any more important, I just see her value decreasing as partner count increases. At high count and low value I just don’t really care about her opinion of me in the same way anymore. It’s flattering to have that interest, but I’m not moved by it.“ If virgins are your thing fine have at them, but call it a kink”All depends on how you define kink I guess. E. g Liking women is a kink. Liking anything can be a kink. Same for liking other guys to have had a turn with her first, that’s a kink.“But you you feel good at being the student? What if you both have something to teach and something to learn? Don't you both have to adapt and meet the new partner that you are with?”Depends what you mean by student. I always consider myself a student. I enjoy learning best through doing and exploration, and that’s what I would be doing. I see myself learning about a partner and helping them learn too.“My only point is that calling an experienced girl "sloppy seconds" makes no sense since they have some advantages over virgins.”Sure, they can have advantages and some people are into that. But they’re definitely not advantages that outweigh the alternative for me when it comes to picking a long term partner. "sloppy seconds" is kinda mean, I just wanted to say it because it’s a snappy line, but I do find it quite gross so it’s somewhat apt. Having side benefits doesn’t really change that.
“And they can call out dicks "useless milked meat" by the same logic.”It doesn’t operate on logic though. In this social landscape of feeling and sensing, if they don’t feel that way then it’s not real – or at least it’s only as real as the number of people that feel it. It goes both ways, there’s plenty of other things that women typically feel which men typically don’t, but we accept as just the way things are nonetheless.
@AllThatSweetJazz So the average is considered a lot? That will be a problem for those who enjoy virgins. The girl with no partners will not give you a sex as good. But as we talked you can overlook that and it's fine. No it isn't the same thing. To me is better. When I spar with someone my preferred partners are the ones who know as much as me. Someone who knows much less I have to hold back and isn't as fun. With equal skills we both can give our best while learning with the other. This is me making an analogy between fighting and sex. It's not the same thing to you as far as forming a bond. I don't see what's preventing you to make that bond. The teaching? It's different for sure, but the only difference is you also learn. You also have to adapt. Sorry I am trying to get your point here, but I am about to fall into the "ego" issue again. Nothing wrong with having preferences.
@AllThatSweetJazz I am just trying to understand why you would feel more special with someone with no point of compassion than with someone with it. But to you what matters is just the BIG choice she makes when giving her virginity. I just can't understand the value that has. The same way you teach a virgins things, so will an experienced girl teach you. And learn from you also. Find out together what the other likes. I respect that people prefer virgins. I came here to this question as a guy who doesn't because I honestly felt like non virgins and people who like them were being shamed.
@AllThatSweetJazz It is social conditioning. We agree. But I have made an anonymous poll once asking girls if they would ever be in a relationship with a male pornstar. Vast majority said no. Girls like experience, but they appear to have a limit too.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “So the average is considered a lot? That will be a problem for those who enjoy virgins.”Sure, there’s no reason that it couldn’t simply be the way things are. But I also think that just looking at the “average” is an oversimplification, because there’s demographics and location etc to think about. The median of girls in their 20s is going to be a less than the average taken from ages 20-45, and then you would also have to know the standard deviation to figure out the actual probabilities. But yes, it could be as you described, and people often make compromises.“The girl with no partners will not give you a sex as good. But as we talked you can overlook that and it's fine.”I think you’re interpreting it as me saying that she would have the same ability. What I’m saying is that I would fine it at least as equally enjoyable because of the inexperience. So from my perspective nothing is sacrificed but things are gained.“This is me making an analogy between fighting and sex.”Well good for you, but I don’t relate to that at all. There’s a few aesthetics in sex I can appreciate, but I wouldn’t consider “fighting” to be one of them. I suppose it depends on who you happen to meet to find what aesthetics can be present in a sexual encounter, but I guess this is me confirming I wouldn’t be as interested in such girls. So there we go.“The teaching? It's different for sure, but the only difference is you also learn. You also have to adapt.”Not sure what you’re getting at here. I already said I feel like I am adapting, so this just seems off the rails.“But to you what matters is just the BIG choice she makes”No, actually I’d say mostly it’s not that. I’d say the disgust factor I described before plays the bigger role.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “The same way you teach a virgins things, so will an experienced girl teach you. And learn from you also. Find out together what the other likes.”So there’s a few things there. The things the experienced girls teaches is different from the inexperienced girl. I’d enjoy starting from scratch, the fundamental and everything. And the things the experienced girl has is “ways how I’ve pleased other guys” to my ear. Doesn’t seem like something I want to learn like that. Assuming strictly single partner scenarios, I’d rather have it explained and then explore it with the person I’d prefer to do it with.“I came here to this question as a guy who doesn't because I honestly felt like non virgins and people who like them were being shamed.”Sure, to some extent I’m sure that’s happening but shaming is the preferred way a culture corrects undesirable behaviour, people might take it to a toxic place but I wouldn’t call encouraging people to be a particular way to be crossing that line. I’m sure a lot of people hear opposition and immediately get bent out of shape about it and get all defensive, but that doesn’t necessarily mean they’ve been shamed. But consider the initial reaction of those disagreeing with my perspective, they *immediately* default to “these men must be insecure”. Doesn’t that sound like a toxic level of shaming? It gives people away as just getting defensive.“ But I have made an anonymous poll once asking girls if they would ever be in a relationship with a male pornstar. Vast majority said no. Girls like experience, but they appear to have a limit too.”I know, but that doesn’t really have anything do to with men’s preferences in women. by the way, I find women who like experience to be just as odd, but it falls under what I described before about men and women having different preferences and it none of it needs to be logical, it’s just feelings people have and we have to deal and try to get along with the other sex.
@AllThatSweetJazz We certainly will not reach common ground at least for the most part so let me just address a few points. “Ways how I’ve pleased other guys”. I know she used what she does with me on others but I don't care. Even a virgin girl might have kissed a few guys before and when she kisses you I am sure you won't be thinking "this tongue was inside another dude's mouth at some point". No one actually thinks that. We just enjoy the result. I personally don't enjoy teaching from scratch. I have done it and honestly I prefer to discover each other while already knowing what we are doing. But that is my preference. And in no way shape or form one should be shamed for their preferences. You like this? Good! You like that? Also good! A few generations ago girls virginity was considered scared, more than anything thanks to religious beliefs. Today? There is no reason to shame people for it. None whatsoever. The same way I don't agree in shaming men who prefer virgins. I stand on my belief that it mostly comes from phycological satisfaction, but to each their own.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “Even a virgin girl might have kissed a few guys before and when she kisses you I am sure you won't be thinking "this tongue was inside another dude's mouth at some point".”It would bother me, yes. And it’s the same factors at play.“And in no way shape or form one should be shamed for their preferences.”People should be shamed for things you disapprove of and want to discourage. It’s literally how we deal with all sorts of undesirable behaviour, and we do it *constantly* -- even the people who claim to be anti-shaming. If anything, they do it more than most people.“There is no reason to shame people for it. None whatsoever.”People prefer it. That’s a reason.“I stand on my belief that it mostly comes from phycological satisfaction”Are other types of satisfaction superior?
@AllThatSweetJazz It would bother you? You would think of the people she kissed before and not just enjoy the moment?If we are talking about crimes or taste for underage people I understand. Shaming people for not being a virgin I don't understand. Shame something only because they don't prefer it? Now that is an action that deserves to be shamed. Superior? No. Depends on what your preference is.
@AllThatSweetJazz today if you shame non virgins you are shaming pretty much everyone. Never was humanity more liberal towards sex than today.
@AllThatSweetJazz you know you CAN get an experienced woman whose not going to be a bitch about your inexperience or small size, right? Some of the more experienced ladies can actually be the most down to earth and reassuring. You might actually find their company extremely stimulating. Especially with their more mature personalities and conversation skills. Dont knock what you haven't tried.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “You would think of the people she kissed before and not just enjoy the moment?”Of course I try to enjoy the moment, it would just be better if there wasn’t that history.“If we are talking about crimes or taste for underage people I understand.”We also shame people for basic things like being rude, it’s utterly basic and everyone does it constantly.“Shaming people for not being a virgin I don't understand.”It’s simple, I and what is at the very least a sizable minority of men (if not the majority in my opinion) prefer less/no experience in a girl, so I voice the idea and encourage it. It’s also hard to go wrong with that advice as well: better to err on the side of too little than too much.“Shame something only because they don't prefer it? Now that is an action that deserves to be shamed.”See? Everyone shames constantly, it’s utterly mundane and normal. It’s not the exaggerated shaming and people like to complain (shame others for) on the internet. What I’m doing is regular “hey, don’t be mean to people” type of shaming. It’s function is to correct undesirable behaviour by expressing disapproval. It’s a good mechanism for society to use.“today if you shame non virgins you are shaming pretty much everyone. Never was humanity more liberal towards sex than today.”That’s not an argument against it, but sure.“you know you CAN get an experienced woman whose not going to be a bitch about your inexperience or small size, right?”@This_Is_My_Opinion8 See what I mean? There’s that toxic shaming I was talking about. That’s the shaming you’re actually interested in – people just go off and vomit words to insult others to cue dismissiveness. That’s what most people think of when they hear the word “shaming”, not the normal shaming (which you and everyone else does all the time but just doesn’t like to call shaming).
@AllThatSweetJazz Her history is not something I am concerned with when I am kissing or fucking her. I only think if she is good or bad. We should shame people for things that make sense to shame them for. I don't think it's the majority of men, but let's say it is. So what? You are basically shaming them to make them fit into what you want. That is beyond selfish and immoral. I mean that if society today is more liberal with sex makes zero sense to shame anyone for it. If it wasn't ridiculous before...Like I said before shaming people for bad actions is valid. For a person not fitting into what you want isn't.
“Her history is not something I am concerned with when I am kissing or fucking her. I only think if she is good or bad.”Good for you.“We should shame people for things that make sense to shame them for.”Right, and if you reflect on it you’ll notice you do it all the time, even for mundane things.“You are basically shaming them to make them fit into what you want.”I’m sharing with them how I feel and what I like. They do the exact same thing and expect men to hear and conform to the things they want in large part. We either have to change our desires or compromise and find a way to live together, and trying to force people to change their desires has gone very poorly – most of our sexual desires are part of reproductive instincts rooted in biology, people don’t just change that stuff. We have to tell each other what we want and hopefully satisfy each other’s expectations.So spare me the “That is beyond selfish and immoral” nonsense. You’re just exaggerating what “shaming” means.“I mean that if society today is more liberal with sex makes zero sense to shame anyone for it.” Makes plenty of sense, if you want to discourage that behaviour then you express it to them. It doesn’t matter how many or how few do it – if you think it’s bad, then discourage it.“Like I said before shaming people for bad actions is valid. For a person not fitting into what you want isn't.”But it’s not just “what I want”, it’s good advice. I’m discouraging a bad action.So when you described the poll where women didn’t want to get with men who are porn stars, if a bunch of women say “I’d prefer you not be a porn star”, that’s unacceptable shaming is it? Sounds entirely valid to me.
@AllThatSweetJazz Depends on what your goal is. If you are just sharing what you like fine. Everyone can do that and all the other must respect. If you goal is to shame people to be the way you want... now that's a hole new issue. No. We shouldn't compromise. We can't live our lives thinking "I will/won't stay a virgin because my future partner might like/dislike virgins." We have to be "I will/won't be a virgin because I feel like it and I have to find a partner who is fine with it." It's an individual choice. And yes shaming people for it in order to get your way is imoral and selfish. People should be encouraged to make their own choices. You can say "I think this". Not "everyone should think this". When regarding personal choices that affect only the individual of course. You are not discouraging a bad action. Having sex is not a bad action. In fact very far from it. It is healthy physically and mentally and it feels good. Regardless if it's with someone you married or not.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “Everyone can do that and all the other must respect.”They aren’t obligated to respect it.“No. We shouldn't compromise.”They have to compromise all the time. People make a decision about the things they want and will give up things they care less about in order to have things they care more about. Saying never compromise is idealistic nonsense. Realistically, people weight up their options and make a decision about whatever it is that’s on the table. That’s life.“People should be encouraged to make their own choices.”They are making their own choices. A society expressing disapproval and advising good courses of action is influencing that.“You are not discouraging a bad action. Having sex is not a bad action.”Yet, we’ve already discussed the preferences on the upper limits of partner count. That and other factors can make sex a bad action, sometimes it’s not healthy or wise. So clearly, it’s not so cut and dry. Society warning people about trends in behaviour and preferences is healthy shaming.
@AllThatSweetJazz People compromise time of fun in order to get a degree, for example. Things that matter. Honestly if having sex will make some people in the future not want me, they are also not the kind of people I want. So I am not compromising anything. Thankfully society today more and more doesn't shame people for having sex. In fact thanks to teenage popular shows like "Sex Education" they even encourage it.As long as you take the proper precautions sex has zero repercussions regardless of the number of partners you have. There is the change of STD and pregnancy, but if all precautions are taken the odds of it happening are slim at best.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “Honestly if having sex will make some people in the future not want me, they are also not the kind of people I want.”Realistically, you’re only going to do it insofar as it’s practical, just like everyone else. E. g if *no one* wanted you if you did that then you wouldn’t. “In fact thanks to teenage popular shows like "Sex Education" they even encourage it.”Shit’s toxic.“As long as you take the proper precautions sex has zero repercussions regardless of the number of partners you have.”Except for the partner count itself and the behaviour being engaged in.
@AllThatSweetJazz And that is the moment shaming becomes imoral and selfish. The moment people shame in an attempt to make most people be a certain way. Just for the purpose of making sure they have can find what they want and nothing else. Actually is not. It reaches how important it is to embrace sexuality, not be afraid if it. Of course also teaches the importance of good information and safe sex.Those things are not bad consequences.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “And that is the moment shaming becomes imoral and selfish.”On the contrary, shaming is the only way a free society enforces morality and maintains any cohesion.“Just for the purpose of making sure they have can find what they want and nothing else.”But don’t we want people to get what they want, so why wouldn’t I give them advice to help them do that? Shouldn’t we warn people that the stove is hot, or that they’ll get fat by eating too much, or that they should be polite to people? It’s all the same shit. We want people to be equipped to deal with the world in a healthy way, be able to integrate into society, and to have access to all the opportunities they can have the things they really want. That’s way *I’m* telling them to do.“It reaches how important it is to embrace sexuality, not be afraid if it.”Embracing sexuality doesn’t mean fuck everyone you can. I’m telling people to embrace it in a healthy way.“Those things are not bad consequences.”Of course they are, we see it reflected in the culture in people who’ve grown toxic because of such destructive behaviour. We see people who can’t get what they want today because indulged in bad advice yesterday. People end up compromising more now than the otherwise would have if they were encouraged in the right things and discouraged in the wrong ones.
@AllThatSweetJazz Read what I said. The goal is not morality or any other social benefit. In this case the goal is personal benefit. Because social benefits in shaming non virgins are zero. Society is better if we look at sex like a simple and natural thing.Your freedom end where the others begin. Yes, we want people to have whjat they want, but not at the expenses of other not having what they want. You are not warning people of danger, like the stove. You are just pushing them to fit into what you want, with no regard for what they might want. But you can fuck many people in a healthy way. No they are not! You call it destructive behaviour. In what way does having sex destroys anyone? Is just sex! You are encouraging them to do the right thing, you are scaring to do somthing they have the desire to. You are not saying "be careful of the sea" you are saying "don't ever go to the sea!".
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “In this case the goal is personal benefit.”That’s what I’m giving people.“Because social benefits in shaming non virgins are zero. Society is better if we look at sex like a simple and natural thing.”We can do both. The benefits are plentiful.“Your freedom end where the others begin.”That’s why a free society uses shaming.“Yes, we want people to have whjat they want, but not at the expenses of other not having what they want.”That’s what *I’m* saying.“You are just pushing them to fit into what you want, with no regard for what they might want.”On the contrary, I’m helping them get what they want. And you not noticing the hot stove is exactly the reason people need guidance. They focus on the short term and don’t think about the future of themselves or others.“But you can fuck many people in a healthy way.”Oxymoron.“In what way does having sex destroys anyone?”Toxic changes in attitude, behaviour, culture. Ultimately it seems harmful on both a personal and societal level. We tried it, it didn’t work out very well, naturally we’re going to shame destructive behaviour. It’s not even like anyone is stopping people, if they really want to do it then they will. Only people who feel absolutely dedicated to that life choice should go down it.“You are encouraging them to do the right thing, you are scaring to do somthing they have the desire to.”I tell people they shouldn’t do drugs either, but I also thing they should be legal if people what to do them. This is no different.“You are not saying "be careful of the sea" you are saying "don't ever go to the sea!".”Nope.I’m telling them to be careful. I think you’re just hearing the opposition you want to hear.
@AllThatSweetJazz No. You are pushing into others what is best for you.I don't see any benefits in remaining a virgin. Literally none.That doesn't makes sense here. Because in this case you are shaming someone to take away their freedom of choice. And you are doing it out of ego.That's not what you are saying. You want others to not do what they want, so that you can.People need guidance? No. People need information and then do their decision. You are talking about making their decisions for them. Because what? Because you think you know better than them what they want? Please let's not fool ourselves. Not only you don't know better what they want you are also not doing it for them. You are doing it for yourself. No it isn't. It's 100% possible to fuck a lot of people in a healthy safe way."Toxic changes in attitude, behaviour, culture. " what toxic changes? As far as I see it those changes are exactly the opposite of toxic.
@AllThatSweetJazz It's completely different to say "don't do something that we know is 100% bad for your health" and say "don't have sex". Sex is actually good for your health. I am the one saying "do it but be careful". You are saying "don't do it at all"No. You are pushing into others what is best for you.I don't see any benefits in remaining a virgin. Literally none.That doesn't makes sense here. Because in this case you are shaming someone to take away their freedom of choice. And you are doing it out of ego.That's not what you are saying. You want others to not do what they want, so that you can.People need guidance? No. People need information and then do their decision. You are talking about making their decisions for them. Because what? Because you think you know better than them what they want? Please let's not fool ourselves. Not only you don't know better what they want you are also not doing it for them. You are doing it for yourself. No it isn't. It's 100% possible to fuck a lot of people in a healthy safe way."Toxic changes in attitude, behaviour, culture. " what toxic changes? As far as I see it those changes are exactly the opposite of toxic. It's completely different to say "don't do something that we know is 100% bad for your health" and say "don't have sex". Sex is actually good for your health. I am the one saying "do it but be careful". You are saying "don't do it at all"
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “No. You are pushing into others what is best for you.”Clearly you aren’t open to hearing otherwise. So no u.“I don't see any benefits in remaining a virgin. Literally none.”We’ve already discussed this stuff, besides I never said people should stay virgins. Again, I think you’re hearing what you want to hear.“ Because in this case you are shaming someone to take away their freedom of choice. And you are doing it out of ego.”Someone telling you that you shouldn’t stuff your face lest you become obese is in no way a removal of your freedom to do so, nor is it for their ego. But I am starting to think that your ego needs me be to be flatly wrong at all costs.“That's not what you are saying. You want others to not do what they want”I want people to enjoy food, I don’t want people to suffer for being fat and they should know the consequences if they’re going to commit to such a lifestyle.“People need guidance? No. People need information and then do their decision.”That’s the same thing. You’re just disagreeing for no reason at this point.“Because what? Because you think you know better than them what they want?”Because of they have to exist in a world external to themselves, there is an objective reality to content with.“No it isn't. It's 100% possible to fuck a lot of people in a healthy safe way.”Mostly not. I think you’re only willing to look at direct physical repercussion like pregnancy or diseases, and are unwilling to consider impacts on the mind, personality, relationships, and social cohesion.“It's completely different to say "don't do something that we know is 100% bad for your health" “The analogies for this are limited because you can’t unfuck people."don't have sex"Never said that. So again, you might want to reflect on whether you’re hearing what you want to hear.
@AllThatSweetJazz Alright let's try to address everything in one topic.In the last reply you talked about giving people freedom of choice. In the same post you talk about giving them guidance. You might think it's the same thing, but when you shame someone for doing an action you are not just giving guidance, you are actively influencing their decision. And it's not the same thing as shaming someone for being fat because being fat is bad for your health, while safe sex has close to no repercussions. In fact is healthy. And the reality of the world today is much more liberal than it was. In the past women didn't had sex because they had to get married, since they couldn't get a decent income on their own and due to ego men wanted them as virgins. Today, not only that kind of men is more rare, but also women have financial freedom and it's much MUCH more socially acceptable to have multiple partners over your life. You can say that it makes society worse. I disagree. Sexual liberation is great for both men and women. About the impact on "mind, personality, relationships, and social cohesion". What impact? Better sex? Happier and more stable people? More social acceptance? You are saying "just have sex with that one person". Just one partner. Or else what? What exactly collapses if a person has many partners?
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “You might think it's the same thing, but when you shame someone for doing an action you are not just giving guidance, you are actively influencing their decision.”Yes, it’s offering good advice about what people ought to do, but not infringing on their freedoms by forcing them to do it like some authoritarian government.“And it's not the same thing as shaming someone for being fat because being fat is bad for your health, while safe sex has close to no repercussions.”Like I said, it’s about more than physical health. Both have plenty of repercussions beyond physical health.“due to ego men wanted them as virgins.”That’s *your* ego talking, much like the toxic shaming I described earlier – intended to belittle and dismiss opposition out of hand.“Today, not only that kind of men is more rare”I disagree. But that wouldn’t invalidate my argument anyway.“women have financial freedom and it's much MUCH more socially acceptable to have multiple partners over your life.”But as we’ve already established there are limits and contexts to it. So you’d have to be arguing against yourself to go hard into that position.“Sexual liberation is great for both men and women.”Positives and negatives. I’m saying to mitigate the negatives.“What impact? Better sex? Happier and more stable people?”Unhappy, less stable people.“What exactly collapses if a person has many partners?”On a small scale their mental health and the outcomes they want in life. On large scale, society, as that damage leads people to further damage each other. You yourself have already revealed that there’s such a thing as too much sexual experience. But when you express your preference it’s apparently not shaming… obviously it is, but you’re all up in huff about it anyway as if it’s awful.And so what "collapses" if we advise women that they’ll probably have better outcomes if they focus more on investing in serious committed relationships over flings?
@AllThatSweetJazz You are just giving an advice. But why are you giving that advice? Is because you want to make the world full with what you want? How was that my ego talking?Society is changing for more liberal views on sex, you can't deny that. People raised under that society will of course consider a non virgin something normal. "But as we’ve already established there are limits and contexts to it" Did we? We clearly disagree on the effect it has on people and society. People's menta health doesn't go down because they had sex. In fact it goes down if they don't. In what way do people damage each other more? Because they can't take a no? I have my preferences, but I will never shame anyone for not fitting into my preference. I don't say don't focus at all in relationships. They can. But if they don't want one at the moment, why not have fun? Boys and girls. Let me try to resume where we don't agree. - It's wrong to shame people for not wanting to be a virgin or not. It's their call.- The effect it has on people and society. - That people view sex today as a more normal thing, is not such a big taboo, as it was a few generations ago. Right?
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “But why are you giving that advice? Is because you want to make the world full with what you want?”Yes, happy, fulfilled, responsible, liberty-minded people.So you would specifically not tell people anything about the world and push them out into the world blind and unarmed?“How was that my ego talking?”Why wouldn’t it be? It’s dragging other men down and thus attempting the elevation of self via contrast. It’s at least equally as valid as any claims you’re making about ego.“Society is changing for more liberal views on sex, you can't deny that.”I’m not, but that doesn’t have any bearing on what I’m saying. Since when does that mean that people can do no wrong? Since when does a trend in attitude always reflect virtue? I think we’ve found the limit and we’re reigning it in to a better place and that change in attitude has been growing over the last few years – but again, not that it matters.“under that society will of course consider a non virgin something normal”Yet, even there we find that fucking absolutely anyone and everyone still grosses people out. Having limits doesn’t that it isn’t normal.“Did we?”Yes.“Many men might prefer some experience to a virgin. But not a lot of experience.”--You“People's menta health doesn't go down because they had sex. In fact it goes down if they don't.”Depends on how the go about it. Given the state of the culture and a lot the attitudes present in it such as yours, it does seem to trend toward toxicity in personality. It also affects other people. I think you’re looking at this with a very short-sighted “if it feels good, do it” mindset. It’s part of compounding effects that results in such things as all the “where have all the good men gone?” articles. Women in those situations would appear to be experiencing some decline in mental health.
“I have my preferences, but I will never shame anyone for not fitting into my preference.”Yet, you’ll tell them that not having sex isn’t as healthy and other such things. That’s shaming dude. Everyone does it, you’ve just got a weird stick up your butt when it comes to saying it aloud.“But if they don't want one at the moment, why not have fun?”Because of the attitude that breeds. Because of the people who don’t like that which make it a struggle to find a partner later on. Say the majority of men share your view, and all women act as you say. If 100% of women act like that and only 60% of men appreciate it, then that’s going to create a problem in the grand scheme of things. And it’s the fools who act idealistically by demanding the other 40% change to suit instead of everyone compromising as appropriate. Seems reasonable to expect people to adapt to the world, but instead, on top of the toxic attitudes, we find women’s desires enforced --with not only shaming but *toxic* shaming -- and men who express different interests being shamed for such interests (but for some reason we can’t use the word “shaming” to describe that shaming).“- It's wrong to shame people for not wanting to be a virgin or not. It's their call.”Nope, I both said it’s their call *and* you are shaming people.“- The effect it has on people and society.”Correct.“- That people view sex today as a more normal thing, is not such a big taboo, as it was a few generations ago.”No, I never said that. That was more of that stuff you just wanted to hear.1 out of 3.You’re still just making assumptions and leaping to conclusions, instead of asking the right questions.
@AllThatSweetJazz I also believe in telling people everything. The main difference here is that we will tell people different things on the advantages and consequences of sex. Other men down? Not at all. I always said everyone can chose whatever they want. It does matter because if society in general is accepts something, then that something becomes more common or at least done more in the open. Is already happening.This phenomenon is not always good, I agree. But in this case it is. Oh that limit in body count? Like I said I have my preference. But my limit is not another's limit. To some the limit is zero. Again let them do whatever they want and then find someone whose limit matches the number they have. But even if there is zero slut shaming the average body count will never be pornstar level. Me saying having sex is healthy isn't shaming. Just like "eating salad is healthy" is not shaming.Number one got me confused since you clearly advocated for shaming.Number 3 is indeed my opinion. I was stating the main points we disagree one and I believe it to be one of them.
@AllThatSweetJazz I believe the consequences is the main point where we disagree. You talked about them in your lastest responses. And I understand your individual and social concern now. That most men will be put off by the women and that causes a social crisis. First like I said there men care less today about that. But let's say that most still do... So what? People don't have to be perfect. My wife is not perfect. Still my wife.An example... If a women wants a men who makes 6 digits. And she finds one she likes a lot, but he only makes 5. If she turns ends thing I will call her dumb and good luck finding someone who you like as much as him. Same way if a man can't be with the potential love of his life because she had a few dicks before his... honestly his fault. I was happy to know my wife wasn't a virgin. Her body count? No idea. Didn't ask.
listen not trying to be rude here but you guys are talking on a 12 day old post and still going at it. I keep getting notifications on here constantly for this dead horse. Can you kindly take it to PM? It's just a friendly request please. I can't ignore the post. Gag hasn't added this feature yet... again just a humble request from a humble man with a lot of notifications going off on his phone constantly while waiting for his PMs to come through.
@t-8900 you are right. Sure.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 ty i appreciate it
@t-8900 It doesn’t let you mute the thread, but you can mute the question. Sorry, but I’m not interested in PMing, I want it to be public.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “Other men down? Not at all. I always said everyone can chose whatever they want.”So did I. But when it’s me, for some reason I’m being called “immoral” and I’m accused of it all coming from my ego – implicitly feeding the whole “insecure” narrative used to thought-terminate.“Is already happening. This phenomenon is not always good, I agree. But in this case it is.”Like I said, that doesn’t mean they can do no wrong. The good and the bad aspects are happening. People need to reign in the bad aspects and be more responsible. It’s obviously poisonous to the culture.“But even if there is zero slut shaming the average body count will never be pornstar level.”So it’s not that shaming is actually immoral, it’s that the way things are aren’t a problem for you, so shaming is only bad as long as things are going your way? Because that’s what that sounds like.“Me saying having sex is healthy isn't shaming.”But again, when I say something, it is shaming?“Just like "eating salad is healthy" is not shaming.”I don’t think the body positive crowd would agree.You must be a bigot because #HealthyAtAnySize.You’re engaging in shaming, just like everyone else. You just don’t like the connotations of the word.“Number one got me confused since you clearly advocated for shaming.”As I’ve pointed out, that’s due to your sematic struggle with the word. To you, it’s clearly loaded up with a bunch of connotations and context from where you’ve heard it used. But it seems to haven’t stopped to dissect the term before.
@This_Is_My_Opinion8 “People don't have to be perfect.”Never said they had to be, I said many times that people often compromise. I have an ideal and but what I accept isn’t a binary, it just diminishes as the circumstances move away from ideal. People need to reconcile their ideals with reality. Instead, what I see is mostly women holding ideals and paying little heed to reality, if not damning it – that’s toxicity.To your point, about women who want 6 figures, yes this is in the vein of things I was referring to. but that’s one example. Again, it’s not a binary. Women will have a range of preferences that trend in that direction or similar aspects. In other words the ideal would be alone those lines, so wouldn’t we then encourage that in men? Obviously there’s no way change that sense of attraction in women. Can I just label women with such expectations “insecure” and call it a day? No, and it doesn’t work the other way either. So the advice men need, especially younger men and boys, needs to be driving them toward the aspects which make them attractive to women. Is that bad to give them that “guidance” or “influence”? Is it bad to tell them that making 6 figures is probably going to help them romantically? I’m trying to have men and women find what they want in each other that’s point to all this.
@AllThatSweetJazz I will reply as a private message to you.