Am I unattractive to women or something?

[boomstheory]

I have been single for 5 years. I've met a few women but nothing worked out. I'm starting to get frustrated and lonely now and the more I look for someone, the more discouraged I become. I don't know why I can't find a girl who is interested in me. I've really not let it bother me too much but i really can't continue to shrug it off anymore. Like why can't I find a girl? I don't think I'm ugly. I'm in decent shape. I'm easy to get along with and treat women with respect.
I am worried I'm going to never meet someone and it really takes a toll on ya after so long. Like I see plenty of lame dudes with good women. Everyone I know is in a relationship. Are some people just ment to be alone? I don't believe in luck really, but other than bad luck I can't conclude a plausible reason as to why I seem to be invisible to women. Any advice

[tilmyheadblows]

I just typed a novel of an answer and accidentally backed out.. it was mostly going into how to construct a dating profile.

▪︎dont use topless pics. most women don't care that much about your body or if you have ads and topless pics are often seen as fuckboy material so they will get avoided by many women. Wear what you'd wear in day to day life, your body shape is still easy to make out and thats all that matters really.

▪︎ someone commented tattoos. Most women won't care about your tattoos at all. Maybe mention you're inked in bio if you're worried about it being an issue later, but its not that.

▪︎ if you want a good selection of pics, start with a clothed selfie where you're smiling genuinely. other than that I'd primarily use photos of you with friends/family, pets or photos friends/family took of you. If you do want to throw in a topless pic, throw in a beach or pool pic that you didn't take yourself. Somewhere towards the middle to end of the gallery.

▪︎ dont use your bio to emphasize what you're looking for. I'd go as far as expressing the longevity I want from the connection; long term/short term/hook up etc. Use your bio to talk about you, but don't be self depreciating and don't be overly cocky. Just talk about what you like, maybe your taste in music if music is important to you, talk about what you want out of life and what your hobbies and activities are etc. Maybe put in disclaimers at the bottom (I. e. mention you're inked in case people don't like tats, if you drink/smoke mention that etc)

I personally think you shouldn't stress too hard about it; the right person will come into your life eventually. Just enjoy the ride for the time being, man. You got this. :)

[DaveJord]

That's what I was going to say, Google how create a good online profile and dos and don't of profile pics.

[boomstheory]

Well I mean as for the tattoos, I ain't really trying to act like I don't have them. Lol. And I don't use topless pics. Unless I'm at the beach or something. I posted here cause fuck it. It doesn't matter what I wear. And I'm not the type to be excessively materialistic.

[tilmyheadblows]

@boomstheory all good, I just know I saw someone comment that the tattoos would be the cause, but thats just a dumb theory lol.

[devilish-cutie]

Just know that you are normal and not alone. Plenty of us are in the same boat. People often lie about their relationships and just know things are not as they seem. Why do you think there are so many divorces? Many settle and put up with something a lot of us wouldn't. If you had no standards youd find someone in no time, so you are not alone cause you can't find anyone but cause you actually have standards cause probs you couldnt accept less than your standards and if you would youd be unhappy. Its just hard to find someone you really click with. If true love was easy wed all have it. I also struggled with accepting that its not all up to you, but it really is that way. You can only do so much, shouldn't kill ysf over it or go nuts. just keep trying, take care of ysf, take breaks, do what you love and hang with friends and family.

[WindAtMyBack]

You post pictures of abs and tats. That tells me that you think it matters. Well it doesn't.

I don't know why you aren't getting a girl. ( I'm not going to make it plural because you only need one. )

While abs and tats could make a small difference, they are extremely minor. What really matters is what comes out when you open your mouth. You need to have something to say. I don't know why you aren't getting a girl. But I know that you need to pay attention to conversation. If you can carry on a conversation about a variety of topics, that goes a long ways. Start there. Then worry about the rest.

[NetSapien]

ok... I have a question

"Like I see plenty of lame dudes with good women." is this how you normally speak about others? If so this may be indicative of why you may be having problems. You don't necessarily elaborate on what makes these guys lame or the women good. Do you know these individuals?

I mean, I've lived with a girl currently for a couple of years and we enjoy a 24 hr Dom/Sub lifestyle. She voluntarily considers herself my property and I her Master. Am I lame? And personally I consider myself ugly as fuck.

[OlderAndWiser]

Dude, all those tattoos are a major turn off for many women. What were you thinking?

[techguy36]

Plenty of women have over twice as many as he has and even more with full sleeves with a lot of coverage and they're super into it. I don't think it's a complete turn off like it used to be back in the day. I'm sure some still prefer clean cut though.

[OlderAndWiser]

@techguy36 I think less than 50% of all girls will consider such a guy for anything more than a ONS, but it would make a good subject for a poll.

[techguy36]

You could be right. A Poll could help gather a bit more data to know for sure. Appreciate the feedback

[OlderAndWiser]

@techguy36 Girls, does a guy having tattoos make him more attractive, less attractive, or neutral/it doesn't matter? ↗

[techguy36]

Good stuff, learned quite a bit with that one. Thanks for the follow-up

[OlderAndWiser]

My pleasure. That is one of the great benefits of this site!

[Loveydove]

Aww don’t beat yourself up. You will find someone one day. It takes time. A few pointers
1. Where are you going to meet people? Maybe try different places that you haven’t tried before
2. If you have a type try expanding that. Maybe your “type” is just not that into you. But there are more women out there than just your type.
3. Patience it will happen. Just love your life and don’t be sad. You don’t know what those “lame” guys have to go through to keep their women

To answer your question you are nor unattractive. You’re a pretty handsome guy.

[JohnPrestwick]

I suggest building up your social life. It's ironic, but the men best suited to finding and having a girlfriend are those who are best suited to life without a girlfriend. Look for activity/hobby groups, meetup groups, voluntary work, churches, evening classes, your workplace and other options. Ideally look for places where you can meet both men and women in your peer group. Make some non-romantic female friends – they can advise you and introduce you to new people.

Confidence is what makes men attractive. It also helps to be a good person to have conversations with, to have a good social life, good prospects and having hobbies that you are keen on.

The main thing you have to avoid is being desperate, because that is a turn-off.

[MrJMM]

Ok, answer me this. What do you value more personality or body on a woman? Do you show off your body to women without saying anything but your body doing all the work? If you do have social media is just filled with you being shirtless or being in the gym?

[qwert1234]

Do you lack confidence? Or confuse confidence with arrogance?
Do you know how to talk to women? Can you keep them engaged in a conversation but keep some mystery so they would always have something to look forward to?

[UCantBlockMe101]

The results of your approaches. And your high rejection odds, means that yes... To most woman you are unnatracrtive... Now that doesn't mean to all.. you are most likely attractive to some girls out there... Jus gotta find them... But yes your result say that to the majority of. girls. you are unnatracrtive unfortunately

[UCantBlockMe101]

I'm a unnatracrtive to girls and get rejected a lot too

[lisaleib]

Maybe because you don’t know how to spell.

[genericname85]

if you present yourself like that on a dating site, that's quite unattractive. not cause you look bad but cause those pictures don't exactly show you in a way that makes you seem desirable as a person.

[DaveJord]

Most things I read, say women don't want to see shirtless mirror photos of dudes. So if thats what your using and a profile pick... rethink it.

[WowwGirl]

Do you live alone , are you driven, are you boring much more than looks matter.

[boomstheory]

I don't live alone I am well driven and nobody is going to say they're boring but I know for sure I ain't boring. I'm definitely unique but I've been told I have a sense of humor and I'm always trying to feel my sense of adventure and I'm very open-minded and I'm into a lot of different things. I'm an open book

[WowwGirl]

I don't know man

[horsenrhinounicorn]

Nice abs. Having a positive attitude and lighting up others lives goes a long ways.

[PuNishant]

I don't think you are ugly.
I think it's just badluck
How about you strop trying and wait for better opportunity. You will get someone better.

[AviatorTom]

What do your tats say about you? What do you think they say to a woman?

[DWornock]

You should look for a big girl. Hot girls are out of your league.

[H3LLBRING3R]

You look decent mate, you just gotta change how you go at it.

[Anonymous]

Because your penis is 2 inches long moron not to mention your ugly as fuck and nobody wants to have kids with you. Girls can actually have guys that are sexy and nice; if all dudes were like you, I would be FULL lez for sure!!

[pmoore1805]

I'm here for a serious relationship that would leads to marriage

[bones_20]

Awww this broke my heart 😣

[Hangry06]

It's the tattoos i believe

[joeldalton]

What are you passionate about?

[Anonymous]

Yeah a lot of women don’t like white supremacists